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Leonard Hatred 7:11 Wed Oct 16
Accent jokes
*Glaswegian*

What's the difference between Bing Crosby and Walt Disney?

Bing sings...but Walt DISNAE.



Fuck off. That's a good joke.

Furnish me with some more accent jokes.

Replies - Newest Posts First (Show In Chronological Order)

easthammer 8:49 Mon Oct 21
Re: Accent jokes
Two Scottish ducks on a tamdom bicycle.
One turns to the other and says
"Quack Quack!"
The reply comes back
"Och I canny go no Quacker!"

Far East Hammer 8:07 Mon Oct 21
Re: Accent jokes
Whenever a Brummie opens their mouth, all I can think of saying is "You need Tunes!"

Gavros 11:54 Sun Oct 20
Re: Accent jokes
Bloke walks into the bar with a beautiful lush shiny head of hair. One girl says to her mate "whos he?" Her mate goes "oh him? Irishman. Goes by the name of Tim O'Tai".

Gavros 11:51 Sun Oct 20
Re: Accent jokes
Bloke furiously strides into a Chinese takeaway.

"Oi, these chips you sold me five minutes ago are fucking RUBBERY!"

Man behind the counter replies "Oh, thang you very much!"

eswing hammer 10:52 Sun Oct 20
Re: Accent jokes
Seeing as some real old ones are poppping up ,a white bloke walks onto the beach and sees a black fella sitting just by the water ,he asks him what is the water like mate? to which the black fella replies ,”it’s Luke warm” so the white fella dives in but gets back out and says “that’s freezing,l thought you said it was Luke warm ?”and the black fella says “well it look warm to me!”

Mad Dog 9:53 Sun Oct 20
Re: Accent jokes
And I notice I'm not the first to write the kipper tie joke

Mad Dog 9:50 Sun Oct 20
Re: Accent jokes
I didn't say it was a good one.

However how much will a cockney pay for shampoo?

Panten

Mad Dog 9:49 Sun Oct 20
Re: Accent jokes
Brummie walks into a Taylor's shop.

"Alroite mate have yow got a 70s suit I could buy"
"Certainly sir, would you like a kipper tie?"
"That would he great mate, 2 sugars please"

mallard 9:39 Sun Oct 20
Re: Accent jokes
Not heard that one, enlighten me

Mad Dog 9:08 Sun Oct 20
Re: Accent jokes
Anyone done the brummie kipper tie / cup of tea joke yet?

FruityBoots. 7:10 Sun Oct 20
Re: Accent jokes
(In a brummie accent)

What’s the difference between a buffalo and a bison?

You can wash your hands in a bison

Briano 6:56 Sun Oct 20
Re: Accent jokes
Glaswegian dwarf in the Savoy bar when a leggy blonde walks in
Looking up at her he say ' can I smell yer faanny?'
She replies ' certainly not you disgusting little man'
So he says 'must be your arse then'

147man 5:21 Sun Oct 20
Re: Accent jokes
In a Tea shop in Edinburgh

Q: Is that a cake or a Meringue?

A: No your right it's a cake

mashed in maryland 11:00 Sat Oct 19
Re: Accent jokes
No a totally different one. Erm...

*moonwalks out of thread*

Far Cough 10:50 Sat Oct 19
Re: Accent jokes
mashed, you mean the one that is 3 posts down from yours?

mashed in maryland 10:46 Sat Oct 19
Re: Accent jokes
2 brummies at a train station

One asks the other how to get to London

"You need to get the Slough train"

"No I'd rather get there quickly please"


And there's also one about a kipper tie but i can never tell it right

Moncurs Putting Iron 9:39 Thu Oct 17
Re: Accent jokes
Queen Mother visiting a hospital during the war comes upon a badly injured Anzac soldier.

Overcome with compassion She says quietly you didn't come here to die.

Soldier replies that's right I've bin 'ere since las' Tuesd'y

Boycie 9:37 Thu Oct 17
Re: Accent jokes
dya lark dargs?

nychammer 8:59 Thu Oct 17
Re: Accent jokes
Oldie......

Brummie walks into a tailors.
"Alroit, mate. I'd like a 70s suit, please."

The tailor says, "Certainly sir, and would you like a kipper tie?"

Brummie says, "Thanks mate, two sugars please."

eswing hammer 4:45 Thu Oct 17
Re: Accent jokes
Liverpool lad goes into an animal skin shop and asks to see some coats, shop owner says “certainly sir ,what fur?” Scouser replies “fur me Judy outside”.

BRANDED 4:04 Thu Oct 17
Re: Accent jokes
Pickle Rick 3:13 Thu Oct 17

Do you need to agree with people?

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