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New Limerick Thread
Posted: 30 Aug 2014, 19:44
by les marteaux
Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 01 Aug 2024, 23:04
by Helmut Shown
"Mum and Dad's out, we can be crude, And say all the words that are rude. you've alighted upon Some Flanders and Swann Plagiarism! I must conclude There was a young man callled Jack Who fingered his girlfriend's crack **Sorry MO you didnt leave the next two lines"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 31 Jul 2024, 12:23
by Mike Oxsaw
"Mum and Dad's out, we can be crude, And say all the words that are rude. Like ""Golly!"", and ""Gosh!"", ""What you looking at, Tosh?"" Can't handle those? You're a prude."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 30 Jul 2024, 16:39
by arsene york-hunt
"There was a young bloke from Milan Concerned by the spattered pan, ""I really must stress, You must clean up your mess."" He said loudly to his old gran. Mum and Dad's out, we can be crude, And say all the words that are rude."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 30 Jul 2024, 16:39
by arsene york-hunt
"There was a young bloke from Milan Concerned by the spattered pan, ""I really must stress, You must clean up your mess."" He said loudly to his old gran. Mum and Dad's out, we can be crude, And say all the words that are rude."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 29 Jul 2024, 23:17
by Helmut Shown
"When I walked in the door I deduced, That my bathroom was smelling of foost Behind the bath panel Was a rotting old flannel Or was it the shit I just loosed? There was a young bloke from Milan Concerned by the spattered pan"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 29 Jul 2024, 18:38
by arsene york-hunt
"Bob Ballard was telling the truth, And the wokers have gone through the roof Many think it's OK. To talk in this way. Though some say that he was uncouth, When I walked in the door I deduced, That my bathroom was smelling of foost"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 29 Jul 2024, 15:23
by Mike Oxsaw
"Did you watch last night's bummer fest? The ceremony failed to impress But, please let me know, When we see camel-toe I cannot be arsed with the rest. Bob Ballard was telling the truth, And the wokers have gone through the roof"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 28 Jul 2024, 19:13
by arsene york-hunt
"There was a young man from Algiers Arrested for consorting with queers They gave him a chance Was deported to France, Where he's free to pound other blokes rears. Did you watch last night's bummer fest? The ceremony failed to impress"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 28 Jul 2024, 15:51
by Helmut Shown
"Next month it is August, at last, Then Christmas will soon come up real fast It’s really a bummer We’ve waited for summer One month and it’s a thing of the past There was a young man from Algiers Arrested for consorting with queers"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 25 Jul 2024, 19:55
by Mike Oxsaw
"An Austrian man called Fritz, Joined a club full of old gits And, down un the basement, Found his daughter's replacement. The old coot was chuffed right to bits. Next month it is August, at last, Then Christmas will soon come up real fast"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 25 Jul 2024, 13:05
by arsene york-hunt
"A fat German man called Hans Sat watching telly in his pants, He liked watching Bullseye, Loved The King and I His favourite the song Shall We Dance. An Austrian man called Fritz, Joined a club full of old gits"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Jul 2024, 23:34
by Helmut Shown
"An Italian vet'ran from the war Found his army plimsoles in a drawer As his mob got defeated Fleet footed he retreated Saying ""fuck this I don't like it anymore"" A fat German man called Hans Would sit watching telly in his pants"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Jul 2024, 12:30
by arsene york-hunt
I've been trying for a couple of hours to post. then this Take your pick.
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Jul 2024, 12:29
by arsene york-hunt
"It was her first time in Dubai For dinner she was served a sheep’s eye, Picked it up then chewed She said something lewd, Then to the streets, her trade to ply, An Italian vet'ran from the war Found his army plimsoles is a drawer."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Jul 2024, 12:28
by arsene york-hunt
"It was her first time in Dubai For dinner she was served a sheep’s eye, Picked it up then chewed She said something lewd, The to the streets, her trade to ply, An Italian vet'ran from the war Found his army plimsoles is a drawer."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 23 Jul 2024, 23:09
by arsene york-hunt
"It was her first time in Dubai For dinner she was served a sheep’s eye, Picked it up then chewed She said something lewd, Then to the streets, her trade to ply, It's well known and axiomatic, That David Lammy is quite thick.."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 23 Jul 2024, 23:06
by arsene york-hunt
"It was her first time in Dubai For dinner she was served a sheep’s eye, Picked it up then chewed She said something lewd, The to the streets, her trade to ply, It's well know and axiomatic, That David Lammy is quite thick.."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 23 Jul 2024, 13:09
by Helmut Shown
In a packed tube a man called Cliffy Was cursed with an unwanted stiffy It caused quite a shock When he whipped out his cock Well in South Ken they can be a bit sniffy It was her first time in Dubai For dinner she was served a sheep’s eye
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 23 Jul 2024, 13:06
by Helmut Shown
In a packed tube a man called Cliffy Was cursed with an unwanted stiffy It caused quite a shock When he whipped out his cock Well in South Ken they can be a bit sniffy It was her first time in Dubai For dinner she was served a sheep’s eye
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 23 Jul 2024, 13:04
by Helmut Shown
In a packed tube a man called Cliffy Was cursed with an unwanted stiffy It caused quite a shock When he whipped out his cock Well in South Ken they can be a bit sniffy It was her first time in Dubai For dinner she was served a sheep’s eye
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 23 Jul 2024, 13:02
by Helmut Shown
In a packed tube a man called Cliffy Was cursed with an unwanted stiffy It caused quite a shock When he whipped out his cock Well in South Ken they can be a bit sniffy It was her first time in Dubai For dinner she was served a sheep’s eye
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Jul 2024, 23:58
by arsene york-hunt
"A disgusting young man from Crete Arrested for shitting in the street, And, so I have heard, When he choked out his turd, It landed in his trouser seat. In a packed tube a man called Cliffy Was cursed with an unwanted stiffy"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Jul 2024, 13:05
by Helmut Shown
"With big money transfers brewing, Will we end up with Calvert-Lewin I fear the stench Of the physio’s bench And myriad injuries ensuing A disgusting young man from Crete Arrested for shitting in the street"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Jul 2024, 03:04
by arsene york-hunt
"Now Biden has fin'ly said ""Bye"" And many I guess will now cry., He was asked by a rep, Why he's taken this step, Said: ""Search me, I just don't know why."" With big money transfers brewing, Will we end up with Calvert-Lewin"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Jul 2024, 03:04
by arsene york-hunt
"Now Biden has fin'ly said ""Bye"" And many I guess will now cry., He was asked by a rep, Why he's taken this step, Said: ""Search me, I just don't know why."" With big money transfers brewing, Will we end up with Calvert-Lewin"