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There won't have been too many matches this season where we go in as relatively strong favourites with this bookies, but the game this weekend is one.

Big Ange and his mates come to town, in a game that is most notable (as a footballing spectacle) for being between two teams that can lay claim to having had the most disappointing seasons across all of European football.

Few would have predicted either would be languishing where they are before a ball was kicked, but we go into this game as the 'worst of the rest' with the relegation places sewn up (thank fuck) and all that's left to play for the worst kind of bragging rights.

Let's hope at the end of this one we can be claiming whilst we might be shit, we're not as shit as the Lilleywhites from North London.

Team I'd like to see:

I'd have Kilman out for this one. He's made some high profile cock ups in recent weeks, and Mavropanos is deserving of the start. JWP has been an ever present non-entity so I'd have the fight brought by Alvarez back for this one in a game where we're likely to be on the counter, with Paqueta looking his best in games when he's dropped back to make the play.  Soucek remains our second most likely goal threat so has to play, and the forward line looks so much more functional with the big German in.

It feels an easy team to pick, with the only real conundrum Scarles or Emerson...but I'd bring the home grown talent in for this one...quite simply it will mean more to him.

Prediction: 1-1

Feels like this will be a game with added meaning this season purely for the lack of other interest. Spurs of course are still fighting in Europe, but whilst their fans claim it's our cup final not theirs, they always seem pretty bothered when we fuck them over.

But continuing the theme of an unsatisfactory season, I'm going for an unsatisfactory result that helps no one, leaves ol' Cock Piss firmly mired in the critics sights, and sees us continue to limp towards the 24/25 finish line. 

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Match Centre:


Odds:
West Ham: 6/5
Draw: 13/5
Spurs: 2/1

Pre-Match Press Conference:
Official Press Conference

Tactical Preview: 
Babbling Irons

Watch-along:
Hammers Chat

Streams:

SportHD 

(With all live streams be mindful they can carry viruses etc.  Don't click on any ads and use a VPN).
  

A tough watch this. 

Are we respecting the point and issuing our invitation to the 4bees to feel free to have a go we'll all be in our penalty area?

This is so tedious it’s embarrassing.

Our best player......if you think Paqueta is our best player you must be fucking insane

Paqueta is absolutely nowhere near being out best player

The sooner our best player goes the better, well fuck me

Every time someone goes down the sodding ref can’t wait to whistle. Just stop start garbage. Modern day footballers are such a load of fucking nancy boys. 
You’d think we’d be busting a gut to go above these pricks so why aren’t we making use of our only striker

Bowen with a sweet right hook

Someone wake me up when this is over.

The sooner Paqueta fucks off the better

There is absolutely fuck all of positives here. What a shit team we have become 

Is Kilman trying to break the world record for the amount of fouls from behind 
he’s thick as shit 

Get behind the Team  

Pretty low on quality isn’t it? From both sides.

And a weak misplaced pass, and he completely gives up.
cսnt

How pathetic Paqueta is laying down like a right pussy 

claret on my shirt" wrote: ↑04 May 2025, 15:04 Anyone notice Kudus when we scored. He looked p-ssed off Bowen did not pass to him, did not seem bothered we scored and almost walked over to where the players were celebrating. It looked like a complete lack of interest!

Anyone notice Kudus when we scored. He looked p-ssed off Bowen did not pass to him, did not seem bothered we scored and almost walked over to where the players were celebrating. It looked like a complete lack of interest!

Fauxstralian thats been my thinking but the players we get in have to be the right ones. We cannot keep fvcking up recruitment. Athletic, pace, strong and with great attitudes. But the goal keeper, CBs and central striker area all need strengthening.  We are currently a relegation bound squad if nothing changes before next season.  Spurs at least have the excuse that its their Ressies but its our best 11 !!!

2nd half I would sub Cresswell or Emerson for Guilherme.

Soler hasn't been close to what's needed in the PL. He isn't a goal.threat and he isn't a defender, so good riddance.
Soucek is just slow and wank, and Paqueta is so fucking naive . All in all, won't miss any of those 

I must be watching another game, because I thought we played okay. We’ve been playing at a much higher tempo than normal and caused them a few problems. Their goal was against the run of play and came from a mistake. At 0-0 and with us on top, you could hear a pin drop on this thread. As soon as we go a goal down, suddenly everyone has something to say. It’s so negative on here. I know it’s been a shit season but you need to cheer up a bit.

Soucek tries his best but we all know we will lose the midfield if he is part of only 2 in there

Harsh reality is we desperately need 2 athletic, quick centre mids, a new goalkeeper who can use his feet, a top class CB because Kilman is another that’s just too slow and lumbering.  Another central striker also needed because we know Fullkrug is injury prone.

Sell Kudus, Aguerd, Soucek just to get some budget to spend but need to sell others obviously. Rodruiguez, Irvine and in all truth Paqueta too because what we need is about £150 million’s wirth if players if not more.

 

Need to get Kilman and Kudus off at HT. Both are a liability.

He's definitely fucked up starting soucek. Would love to have seen him on last 30 mins if we're looking for a goal. Should have started Soler (who id keep if the price is right and Rodriguez and Irving leave)