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New Limerick Thread
Posted: 30 Aug 2014, 19:44
by les marteaux
Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 07 Aug 2016, 10:52
by Helmut Shown
"A hobo, a tramp and a drifter Now who do you think's a shirt-lifter? The one with a stiffy Near people so whiffy I think I'm in need of a snifter A Welshman round the farmyard would creep With the hope of trapping a sheep"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 06 Aug 2016, 13:27
by Mike Oxsaw
"A young man supporting M*llw*ll Really thought he'd seen it all Till a smelly old minge Possessed by a ginge Made him chuck up his guts in the hall A hobo, a tramp and a drifter Now who do you think's a shirt-lifter?"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 04 Aug 2016, 23:19
by Far East Hammer
A sp*rs fan a cabbie called Lou Was known as a tight fisted jew Giving back change Made him feel strange Passenger rows he'd had a few A young man supporting M*llw*ll Really thought he'd seen it all
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 04 Aug 2016, 13:53
by joe blob
"A box set is good for a thread, Though it always brings things to a head, But they're no good for me Cos on my TV. The sky box I bought is now dead. A sp*rs fan a cabbie called Lou Was known as a tight fisted jew"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 04 Aug 2016, 13:34
by Hermit Road
"There once were three bears in a wood Who fucked up whenever they could They went for a forage Then stirred their porridge, With a daring young girl from the hood. A box set is good for a thread, Though it always brings things to a head,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 23:32
by Mike Oxsaw
"A stadium needs lots of seats, And a do to play out some beats, So, what are the bets That some cսnt from Steps Is what the board pass off as ""streets"" There once were three bears in a wood Who fucked up whenever they could"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 23:10
by Hermit Road
"The washing is out on the line. I hope it don't rain but stays fine. 'Cos I'll creep like a mouse, Because I am a Scouse, And the neighbours new shirt will be mine. A stadium needs lots of seats, And a do to play out some beats,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 19:52
by Mike Oxsaw
"A lunatic escaped from the bin, And indulged in original sin. Balls-deep in some guy But had to say ""Bye!"" When they caught him and sent him back in. The washing is out on the line. I hope it don't rain but stays fine."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 17:26
by les marteaux
"A rather obese lass from Dorset Struggled to get into her corset... She succeeded, I think When she sat in the sink, But ripped open her cսnt on a faucet. The express then dived in a tunnel So the passenger got out his funnel And with his knob out, Shoved it up the clout, Of the great hurdler Sally Gunnel. A lunatic escaped from the bin, And indulged in original sin."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 17:13
by Mike Oxsaw
There was a old man called Rex Had a penchant for underage sex To fulfill his urge He thought he would purge On a zygote encased in perspex The express then dived in a tunnel So the passenger got out his funnel
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 17:11
by Mike Oxsaw
There was a old man called Rex Had a penchant for underage sex To fulfill his urge He thought he would purge On a zygote encased in perspex The express then dived in a tunnel So the passenger got out his funnel
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 15:16
by Helmut Shown
A poor young lady from Cheam Now on hard times it'd seem To keep wolf from the door She became a whore Every Rastafarian's dream There was a old man called Rex Had a penchant for underage sex
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 14:55
by Agent Scud
A poor young lady from Cheam Now on hard times it'd seem Much to her shame She went on the game Her cսnt now reeks like sea bream. A rather obese lass from Dorset Struggled to get into her corset...
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 14:19
by Far East Hammer
"There was a young lady from Fakenham, Lost her drawers as someone had taken 'em Stolen whilst dogging She's left with nothing To cover her now quite sore clam A poor young lady from Cheam Now on hard times it'd seem"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 12:39
by les marteaux
"There was a cute young lady With proclivities quite shady She spent several hours Doing golden showers, With our very own Baroness Brady. There was a young lady from Fakenham, Lost her drawers as someone had taken 'em"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 08:56
by Far East Hammer
"There once was a lady from Barnes, Who spent all her Friday's on farms, Making some income From what? Please keep mum It would have the vicar up in arms! There was a cute young lady With proclivities quite shady"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 01:03
by Hermit Road
"My last car was built by the French It handled just like a dumb wench, But my speech was impeded, So it must be conceded, The issue was misuse of wrench. There once was a lady from Barnes, Who spent all her Friday's on farms,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 00:56
by Mike Oxsaw
"Confucius say don't ever buy, Bog-roll that is single ply, What he say is true Your finger pop through And digit will smell very high. I refer the honoured member to my last ost."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 00:52
by Hermit Road
Oi
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 00:50
by Mike Oxsaw
"It's effective and it is quite fun, Washing you arse out with a bum gun Best make sure that it's not Set on ""Very Hot"" Else ring piece will feel like the sun My last car was built by the French It handled just like a dumb wench"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 00:50
by Mike Oxsaw
"It's effective and it is quite fun, Washing you arse out with a bum gun Best make sure that it's not Set on ""Very Hot"" Else ring piece will feel like the sun My last car was built by the French It handled just like a dumb wench"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 00:49
by Hermit Road
"It's effective and it is quite fun, Washing your arse out with a bum gun But I must confess, That it causes a mess, And you spend the whole day with the runs. Confucius say don't ever buy, Bog-roll that is single ply,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 00:28
by les marteaux
"It's effective and it is quite fun, Washing you arse out with a bum gun"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 03 Aug 2016, 00:28
by les marteaux
"The lefties would have us allow The immigrants tell us all how To treat Allah with awe, Bring in sharia law, And go back to the bronze age right now. It effective and it is quite fun, Washing you arse out with a bum gun"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 02 Aug 2016, 12:20
by Mike Oxsaw
"They elected Reagan before Will Trump get his foot in the door He won't have a clue On what he should do When he blunders, and starts the next war. The lefties would have us allow The immigrants tell us all how"