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New Limerick Thread
Posted: 30 Aug 2014, 19:44
by les marteaux
Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 21 Nov 2014, 02:11
by Saul Bollox
"Scouse gobshite Tony Bellew Is the ""star"" of this weeks pay per view, Hardly A lister's club, If met in a pub, I'd ask him ""Who the fuck are you?"" Everyone from Liverpool's a prick, A neutron bomb may do the trick"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 20 Nov 2014, 19:52
by tiddingtoniron
"Away to scouse cunts we are next Our record against them makes me vexed Since first Devonshires prance Then Franks corner dance We really do seem to be hexed Scouse gobshite Tony Bellew Is the ""star"" of this weeks pay per view"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 20 Nov 2014, 17:37
by Saul Bollox
"This weekend, it's back to the league, Those internats. give me fatigue, All the shit about Blatter, Whom I'd like to batter, For his crookedness and his intrigue, Away to scouse cunts we are next Our record against them makes me vexed"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 20 Nov 2014, 15:26
by Joke Whole
"There once was a young nerophile, (???) When he saw a dead body he'd smile. 'twas Saville, not Young, (But he may too have been one) In true BBC DJ-like style. This weekend, it's back to the league, Those internats. give me fatigue"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 20 Nov 2014, 14:33
by les marteaux
"I've got a fucking awful cold It's making me feel really old I'll give you a tip Take a glass of Lemsip, And wash your old hankies with Bold, There once was a young nerophile, When he saw a dead body he'd smile."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 20 Nov 2014, 14:33
by les marteaux
"I've got a fucking awful cold It's making me feel really old I'll give you a tip Take a glass of Lemsip, And wash your old hankies with Bold, There once was a young nerophile, When he saw a dead body he'd smile."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 20 Nov 2014, 03:22
by Far East Hammer
"This Limerick thread is incredible The effect on one frankly , indelible And if they're too hard You're mentally scarred All-in-all most regrettable I've got a fucking awful cold It's making me feel really old"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 19 Nov 2014, 23:56
by Son of Sam
"In the jungle, the whining fat tart she's found the need to depart those opening three words got me strumming some chords and singing ""Wimoweh""s made me to start This Limerick thread is incredible The effect on one frankly , indelible"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 19 Nov 2014, 23:13
by Helmut Shown
"A young man from Canary Isles Had problems retaning his piles The solution to the dilemma Was a young girl called Emma He appears now in the Local police files In the jungle, the whining fat tart she's found the need to depart"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 19 Nov 2014, 13:28
by les marteaux
"Robs lad, young Elliott Lee Was sent out on loan, by the sea... He was shocked to the core When he walked in and saw, The changing rooms he said ""Fuck me!"" A young man from Canary Isles Had problems retaning his piles."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 19 Nov 2014, 13:15
by tiddingtoniron
"So Winston will be on his bike Is there something that he doesn't like We`ve been dropped in the pooh By our own "" number 2"" Wanting a whopping great salary hike Robs lad, young Elliott Lee Was sent out on loan, by the sea......"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 18 Nov 2014, 18:07
by Helmut Shown
Big Fat Sam's lazing in the sun with his moose-faced wife's wrinkled bum When viewed from behind Without being unkind Just like Steve Bruce just ready to come So Winston will be on his bike Is there something that he doesn't like
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 18 Nov 2014, 09:27
by easthambull
While painting a small model plane I got the hues all wrong - again! Howard or Hef (was one of them deaf?) You can tell that I don't have a brain Big Fat Sam's lazing in the sun with his moose-faced wife's wrinkled bum
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 18 Nov 2014, 04:16
by Joke Whole
A lady I know has a cat Which she always makes lick her twat As time she did pass It moved onto her arse Which did not resemble a mat While painting a small model plane I got the hues all wrong - again!
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 18 Nov 2014, 01:20
by Saul Bollox
"A young girl with very long hair Would tuck it in her underwear Her long auburn locks Excite the local cocks, Most of whom don't have a prayer. A lady I know has a cat Which she always makes lick her twat"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Nov 2014, 20:57
by Helmut Shown
"Fuck! I heard something that caused me to laugh, A bloke had a fit in the bath His wife, (very cold) Poured a scoop of Bold Not a full load but a half A young girl with very long hair Would tuck it in her underwear"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Nov 2014, 20:57
by Helmut Shown
"Fuck! I heard something that caused me to laugh, A bloke had a fit in the bath His wife, (very cold) Poured a scoop of Bold Not a full load but a half A young girl with very long hair Would tuck it in her underwear"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Nov 2014, 20:52
by Helmut Shown
"There once was a German called Schoen Who played football with ""Uli"" Hoene What he liked best by far Was his chocolate star Such behaviour we couldn't condone A young girl with very long hair Would tuck it in her underwear"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Nov 2014, 20:51
by Saul Bollox
"There once was a German called SchÔøΩn Who played football with ""Uli"" Hoene But when he retired His interest expired Now posts lim'ricks and has the odd moan. I heard something that caused me to laugh, A bloke had a fit in the bath"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Nov 2014, 18:12
by easthambull
"When sitting here having a shit The water'd splash back quite a bit It ran down my crack Then dripped off my sack It's lucky I don't have a clit There once was a German called SchÔøΩn Who played football with ""Uli"" Hoene"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Nov 2014, 17:54
by Helmut Shown
There was once a WHO poster named Saul Through the Limerick thread he would trawl When our poetry's lax He would check our syntax Out of ten he'd give us fuck all When sitting here having a shit The water'd splash back quite a bit
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Nov 2014, 17:30
by easthambull
A thread has been started elsewhere One poster is causing despair Oh who can that be? I can't fucking see Quite frankly I'm having a mare. There was once a WHO poster named Saul Through the Limerick thread he would trawl
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Nov 2014, 17:23
by Joke Whole
"Easthambull and Joke Whole, sure enough Are writing some pretty good stuff You posted in haste... Mine's all cut & paste The lines of my own are quite rough. A thread has been started elsewhere One poster is causing despair"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Nov 2014, 17:10
by Saul Bollox
"My bog roll is on the last sheet How, now, can I make my arse neat? The answer my son, Is to use a bum gun, Keeps tho old natal cleft nice and sweet. Easthambull and Joke Whole, sure enough Are writing some pretty good stuff"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Nov 2014, 17:07
by Saul Bollox
"A nan with a prolapsed fat cսnt Was accosted whilst out on a hunt She shouted: Good Heavens, When raped by Ched Evans Who bent her and gave a rear shunt. Easthambull and Joke Whole, sure enough Are writing some pretty good stuff"