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Anxiety/depression

Forum area for all things that are non-football.
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Tomshardware
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Anxiety/depression

Post Tomshardware »

"Been through bad time lately with suffering with this. Dark thoughts as well. I know some posters on here suffer with this. Anyone come through the other side of this shit?

"A number of posters have been yellow carded and told to stay off this thread unless they have anything constructive to add.This is a thread that has been very useful to so many, for any other posters with scores to settle, argue on another thread. This thread is sacrosant.Thank you"
only1billybonds
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post only1billybonds »

"Cheers Norm. Mrs Bonds is doing great. Little bit to great,does my nut in half the time,preferred life when she had the full time ump. Joking,both of us dont ever want to get anywhere near her dark days again."
normannomates
Posts: 103

Re: Anxiety/depression

Post normannomates »

"only1billybonds You are what I class as a proper man.respect to you and hope your missus is doing okay. Driz.. As others said, stick in there pal."
only1billybonds
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post only1billybonds »

"Driz. Feel for you,my Mrs went through a big depression and it was awful feeling so helpless. Best advice i can give you is make sure you give yourself space (mentally) to keep on being yourself as its the real you that she loves and she'll need to know that you're still there. We talk about it now and my Mrs said the one thing that kept her hanging on was knowing that the bloke she loved was still there,walking around the house singing and generally being the same as always. Not easy to do at times but absolutely necessary. Stay strong. Be lucky."
White Pony
Posts: 46

Re: Anxiety/depression

Post White Pony »

"Driz Feel for you mate. This may not sound helpful, but in some ways you are helpless. You can do everything in the world, but the person suffering had to take the first step themselves. This is coming from someone on the other side of the things. I was going to ask if she has family that can support, but you’ve answered that just now. You can’t help her on your own, she needs a support network and professional help. Best of luck mate. Now she’s taken the first step, she is much more likely to get through it."
normannomates
Posts: 103

Re: Anxiety/depression

Post normannomates »

Mike Oxsaw Well said mate..
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Mike Oxsaw
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post Mike Oxsaw »

"Driz 6:51 Thu Feb 4 Best of luck, fella. I can't even begin to imagine what you're going through. After reading and re-reading your original post, all I could think of is that you take up a trivial, personal hobby, such as doing a jigsaw and see if she shows any interest (without being invited). If she throws it all on the floor, well, it's only a jigsaw... Guess that simply shows how little I understand about the situation."
Driz
Posts: 11

Re: Anxiety/depression

Post Driz »

"Thanks fellas, yesterday was a big day as she's finally been able to talk to her family about it and is now talking to her health care assistant and doctor. Looks like meds are the way forward in the short-term and we take each day as it comes."
arsegrapes
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post arsegrapes »

"Driz, sorry to hear mate. Don't know much about it, being a bloke an all, maybe one of the Ladies on hear might know about post natal depression, it's common apparently? This NHS link might help, if your Lady has it sounds like she will need help, therapy or other to help her get through it. https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/post-natal-depression/symptoms/"
Driz
Posts: 11

Re: Anxiety/depression

Post Driz »

"Hey guys, Don't really know why I'm writing anonymously in a forum, I guess it is an outlet in a world where I don't really have many and my closest have their own problems. My world is crumbling at the foundations and I'm fumbling around like a rabbit in headlights. The depression isn't mine, it's my partners and for the last six months I've tried to be the glue to hold everything together but even I feel the cold glare of the abyss as everything I love and everything I have built is dying. We had the perfect relationship and we moved in together a day before the first lock down. I've always been fortunate enough to work through but she worked in leisure and that all quickly went tits up. We'd planned to have a child and as I write, mum is upstairs and I have a beautiful 8 week old new hammer sleeping on my chest. The move and lock down has stripped everything from her. Shitty no good friends have shown their colours and left her. I love how she looks but she's consumed by the fact she's lost her body to pregnancy. She's had a difficult abusive past and has always run from her problems. Her grandfather is on end of life care right now with covid and my ex of five years ago (psycho) just got a job as a placement officer for her course at uni for September. It's a fucking shit show. I try to find the strength each day. I build her up sometimes but it doesn't last long. She's lost the fight, consumed by monotonony and this Ray of sunshine no longer sees the goid in anything. She's triggered by the screaming baby. Bless the lad he's had lots of problems and it took 7 weeks to find a lactose I tolerance. Her son from a previous relationship talks to her like she's shit and he's somewhere on the autistic scale. When she's triggered and rock bottom it's our relationship she targets. I'm not good enough. It's me that makes her like this. It's not. It's circumstance. I give up everything to be the best father and partner I can be but she don't see it. She tells me she wants to run. Leave both the bots with me and disappear. There's no talking to her, she shuns physical contact and I just feel low and rejected. I'm so tired of fighting for my family that part of me wants to call her bluff and tell her to go.. But I want her here, I want to support her through it. I want us to flourish and cherish our world. She has no fight. Just a blank vacant stare.. I know our relationship is founded on good, it is not bad. Her issues are circumstantial but she won't provide solutions and my solutions are never good enough. I'd do anything for this woman. I love her and I know she loves me. She's given up though lads and it is breaking my heart."
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MaryMillingtonsGhost
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post MaryMillingtonsGhost »

"White Pony 9:35 Really sorry to hear this fella. Fingers crosed for you, and all those going through shit times at the moment."
one iron
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post one iron »

"We are all down at this time in our lives, try walking ,i find this helps.everyday i walk around earlswood lakes in redhill surrey, great place its one mile round both lakes, its got a cafe loos if your at rock bottom, talk about it,dont keep it in,ive been to hell and back, without my mates ,i dont think i would have wanted to go on."
Mace66
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post Mace66 »

"Debs 11:33 I feel the same, kunt son but without the kid. Workload and not having time to get out the house."
boltkunt
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post boltkunt »

"In STRUGGSVILLE at the moment with my head, feel so lethargic and no motivation to do anything. Not sure if it's just tiredness though as work is so busy and with little sleep due to the little one it's taking it's toll at the moment."
Darlo Debs
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post Darlo Debs »

Sortyto hear that WP. Hope things turn round fot you. Have my bits crossed .
White Pony
Posts: 46

Re: Anxiety/depression

Post White Pony »

"My business is on the brink and that in turn is tipping me over the edge. It’s been doing really well but fallen off a cliff these last few months. Was in a really bad way about 2-3 years ago and managed to sort my head out then, but seeing worrying signs that I’m heading back down the black hole. At least I recognise the signs this time but anyone that’s been there will tell you, it’s doing something about them that can be the hardest part when you suffer from depression."
Billy Blagg
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post Billy Blagg »

Stevethehammer 3:15 Wed Jan 20 Good to hear. I don't think you can underestimate how much having something else to think about and working alongside other people can get you out of yourself.
Billy Blagg
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post Billy Blagg »

Stevethehammer 3:15 Wed Jan 20 Good to hear. I don't think you can underestimate how much having something else to think about and working alongside other people can get you out of yourself.
Darlo Debs
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post Darlo Debs »

"Good news Steve, good luck wirh tbe new job"
Tomshardware
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post Tomshardware »

Good to hear things are better Steve. 👍🏽
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Bungo
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post Bungo »

"Steve Good to hear that things are looking better currently. One bit of advice I would give is to try to have a plan ready for what you will do in case things take a downward curve. I don't know what that plan might look like for you, but better to pre-empt it than have to start dealing with it from scratch if it happens when you least feel like dealing with it. Hope it's unnecessary but even just having a plan in place might give you some more reassurance and stability now. Good luck."
wanstead_hammer
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post wanstead_hammer »

"Welcome back Steve! Blimey, we nearly sent the search party out for ya. Good to hear you’re doing ok and looking forward to good things as well now. A change is as good as a rest! Keep busy and keep well."
Mace66
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Re: Anxiety/depression

Post Mace66 »

"Hackney Marsh 11:12 Tue Jan 19 Re: Anxiety/depression I’ve suffered in the past , my advice is try to eat healthily, cut out alcohol, get outdoors and talk to people, That last bit especially. The problem is, when you are feeling as low as a snakes belly, it is the hardest thing in the world to do."
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