Anxiety/depression

[Tomshardware]

"Been through bad time lately with suffering with this. Dark thoughts as well. I know some posters on here suffer with this. Anyone come through the other side of this shit?

"A number of posters have been yellow carded and told to stay off this thread unless they have anything constructive to add.This is a thread that has been very useful to so many, for any other posters with scores to settle, argue on another thread. This thread is sacrosant.Thank you"

[Sniper]

"Pents From what you’ve said, you won’t read this. But I just wanted to wish you all the very best. I do hope we’ll see you back on here at some point - it’s not right what’s happened to you, but 99.9% of the shit flinging on here isn’t really meant. I hope you’re ok and I genuinely wish you well"

[JonWHUFC]

Pents horrible read and much love to you mate. The West Ham family came together today and we all got the perfect tonic with today’s result. Live for these moments mate. COYI xxx

[JonWHUFC]

Pents horrible read and much love to you mate. The West Ham family came together today and we all got the perfect tonic with today’s result. Live for these moments mate. COYI xxx

[JonWHUFC]

Pents horrible read and much love to you mate. The West Ham family came together today and we all got the perfect tonic with today’s result. Live for these moments mate. COYI xxx

[Irish Hammer]

"Take care Pents I know you won’t read this but you post made me stop and think. And I’m sending you positive thoughts for your future and love, yes love, despite never meeting or speaking to you. And it’s nothing to do with West Ham, it’s simple decency and my wish in my life, to make the path for others as gentle as can be. Your a special person with unlimited potential. We all are. Don’t let yourself be judged, or be held back by others. What others think of us, is, and should not be, any of our business. Take care my friend. Phil, aka Irish Hammer."

[Pentonville]

"This will be my last post on this site. 6 weeks ago I decided my life wasn't worth a light. I decided, through depression and stress and something that triggered all my childhood abuse, that I was going to walk into the sea and not look back. I started drinking heavily to gain the courage to do this. I obviously didn't want to do it as, if I did, I wouldn't have told anyone. By shouting from the roof tops and threatening to do it, a cry for help was heard by many. A lot on here, a lot of West Ham mates who have not even heard of this site and of course other friends and family. Those west ham mates that don't come on here were calling my wife and family, sending money to her cos she has no access to our accounts and one of our accounts had been frozen. 3 people on here called and text me everyday and one has even sent a book. Alot of you who I've never met sent lovely messages also and all were read. That was roughly 6 weeks or 5 weeks ago. It's thanks to all of you that I came back from the brink. If I had succeeded in drinking myself to death ( I didnt sleep for 4 weeks straight more than 45 mins a day max, I didn't eat for those 4 weeks at all and I was going through a bottle of vodka, 3 bottles of Rose and countless beers eevryday), then people might have said that I got what I wanted. Except it wouldn't have been. Thanks to all of you and my family, an ambulance was called and the beginning of the end started. I thank everyone from bottom of my heart. That isn't the point of my post. The point is I want you to read the boxing thread. I want you to read my messages early on it stating that I was really enjoying talking about boxing as it was making my brain work again. I also said many times, let's not get personal or abusive as i was gently easing myself back into life. Sure the thread got passionate but it was gentle and informative. Then council scum comes on and abuses me. Now either he doesn't read the thread in its entirety or never reads threads like this and doesn't have the empathy to do so. He steams in and abuses. I walk away and will forever walk away now but shame on a lot of you that know what I've been through and say nothing. That cսnt is now my reason to get proper better. I dont like bullies and coming at someone when they are ill and have asked nicely not to is not west ham and not anything except bullying. I know this cos I've been guilty of it in the past. I also cannot stand the comment made to me by Northern Sold about ""he has walked the walk"". Well you don't know me at all all NS do you. Am I supposed to not have an opinion on boxing? Cos u disagree? you will know how silly a comment to me that is one day. Maybe keep watching YouTube up until January and u will find out once my story is out. My point is this. This thread saved my life and seemingly has done so for many others. That's amazing and I hope I helped in someway. It's my time to get back in real world now. Get better and find a new challenge. I think it will be something to do with getting behind online anti bullying campaigns and exploring the link to mental illness. Everyone please take a second before you write. Would I say it in real life. Will it hurt someone. Will it cause bad situations for me in the future. Everything online is recorded. Once said, rarely can you take it back. My mate Flack killed herself cos of it. Amy drank herself to death due to the pressure of it all. Many many people take their lives due to innocent words said or hurtful words said that the author has no idea what it does. Keep this site west ham, keep it civil. Start up slurps again and put faces to names. I'm sure the love and respect will grow again. I won't be reading or signing on anymore but I wish everyone of you and your families health and happiness and if you have neither reach out to someone on here as it helps, it really does. Hopefully see some of you in January when I feel ill be in a very good state if the rate at which I'm growing now continues. Toodlepip x"

[zico]

Yeah I do that now Tom until something else comes up. Hours aren't brilliant as they have a lot of drivers and it's not easy getting more hours with another company because of the driving regulations and getting the right shifts. Was hoping to find a pharmacy delivery one but very few openings around here.

[Tomshardware]

Yeah I can understand that Zico. Was going to say there's a lot of delivery jobs about. I did it for a while some years back when I was struggling for other work and I used to quite enjoy it.

[zico]

"Tom, yeah although I couldn't at the time. My job is driving but must confess I hate the evening shifts now as I get older I struggle in the dark more than I did when I was younger."

[bruuuno]

"*day, my dad already existed"

[bruuuno]

Steve! Seeing you pop on this thread has made my dad. Good to hear things are improving mate. Hold fast x

[Tomshardware]

Yo able to drive Zico?

[Westham67]

My brother has murders with them he has to threaten them with court every years and then they fold. His back is so bad he cannot walk and on tramadol. Just persevere and get what you are entitled to

[zico]

PS my main problem was that it was and is a variable illness so I might be okay for months and then it hits. Even had help from the CAB to complete the form but to no avail. I'm in a calm period at the moment but forever will not be able to move my head sideways or up and down without things moving.

[zico]

"Good luck westham. Oh I know the health pro (use the word loosely) lied about several things, allegedly. The tribunal dismissed my GP as a liar and mixed up reports from different doctors etc. And I had a new tribunal because I found out the doctor on the panel was no longer registered with the GMC. Me being a smart arse finding that out didn't help my cause. Sadly I was only fully diagnosed after the event when I saw a brilliant consultant in London. Prior to that all the MRIs and tests only pointed to either vertigo, migraine assisted vertigo or unknown cause. The thing that worries me now is the episode's ban be triggered by stress and its difficult not to be at the moment."

[Westham67]

"The company who deal with PIP or ESA claims are US companies and denying those benefits is there bonus, Go to your GP ask for all you medical records by law they must give them to you with 20 working days. Its a long road but you have to start somewhere you should not be going through what you are going through as you have a debilitating illness. I have all my medical records and an MRI brain scan coming soon. Its looking like my kids will be here in 3 weeks and then I will see how I feel and some lighter work. I have my GP on my side"

[zico]

"And now my freezer has condensation on it! FFS. I knew this would happen. I suffer with vestibular hypofunction, which is basically buggered balance organs in my ears. Every few years or so I get major vertigo for months on end where my head spins several times daily. My last major episode in 2015 was so bad I was made redundant and couldn't work for quite sometime. The delightful people at the DWP thought otherwise so lost my case at a tribunal, even though the judge admitted no one would employ me. So with no Employment Support Allowance I had to live on the savings I had and that dwindled, so knew it would catch up in the end. There is a small private pension which isn't enough for retirement but it would get me through this shit but if I touch it before 55 you get hammered with tax. So few options but I'll talk to the CAB, thanks."

[Westham67]

"It does it seems like its endless at times but for me its a state of mind I get myself into and sometimes I am the only one who who thinks it a big deal, Citizens advice will open a case file for you see if you can apply for any support with costs"

[zico]

"Thanks westham, and now my PC has gone into a start/stop loop so lord knows how much that will cost. Never rains but pours."

[Westham67]

There is no worse of better positions when it comes to depression and mental illness zico. Go to citizens advice and they can advise you how to manage dept. If you have a 9 to 5 job there is some seasonal work about now sorting office weekend work etc. I know how you feel mate sometimes its overwhelming

[zico]

"Must confess this last week or two is the worst I have ever felt worry wise. I live pretty much bill to bill as that's all my income allows me to and now today I've received my energy tariff prices from Octopus as I was put with them after Avro went bust. Put it this way I could only just afford the Avro prices and jesus the increase is savage in comparison and that's nothing on what could happen next year. What with fuel, council tax going up by potentially 5%, my car is 15 years old, my boiler 20 and I have crossed fingers both will survive a while longer I'm in a right state of worry on how I can cope with the price of living on my wage. A change of job may be the only option but in my early 50's with no Liam Neeson specialist set of skills that's not going to be easy. More clothes with the heating off is my only plan at the moment and it's only October. It was bad enough dealing with mum for the last few years as dementia left her in care, where she still is but now all these money worries is a real concern. Christmas is definitely cancelled and I'm literally hoping on a lottery miracle like millions of others. Sorry, I know many are in a wors4e position but just needed tp get it off my chest."

[Lee Trundle]

"1st thing anyone should do if they're feeling down is get off social media. Have a read of this from Fake Carlton Cole. It's brilliant. I was almost tempted to create a new thread on it, but that's not my style. https://medium.com/@_CarltonCole9/twitter-mental-health-and-me-b0b8e820edac"

[Tomshardware]

"Yes it's great to hear you are well Steve, best wishes."

[Tomshardware]

"Yes it's great to hear you are well Steve, best wishes."

[Block]

"Steve, so glad to hear you're doing well mate."