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Knocking Van
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Whilst 'off-topic' means all non-football topics can be discussed. This is not a free for all. Rights to this area of the forum aren't implicit, and illegal, defamator, spammy or absuive topics will be removed, with the protagonist's sanctioned.
Whilst 'off-topic' means all non-football topics can be discussed. This is not a free for all. Rights to this area of the forum aren't implicit, and illegal, defamator, spammy or absuive topics will be removed, with the protagonist's sanctioned.
Knocking Van
Back in the day , early 80’s when I just left school I use to go out in the knocking van. We would usually meet up outside the Princess Alice boozer in Forest Gate and drive all over London selling household items, such as ironing board covers, pegs, dusters, dish’s clothes etc.
we had some dodgy fake ID from the “youth employment scheme” we would pull out and use as our pitch. There’d be about 10 of us and did we get into some shit. Some fucking hilarious stories. Did it for a while, more for a laugh than for the money but we use to make a few bob.
I remember we kicked off with some Tottenham fans in Broxbourne. we also threw a few punches at the Elephant and Castle with a little firm we ran into.
we were out of control back then.
Anyway, a different world back then, couldn’t get away with anything like that now. Not with all the camera’s everywhere.
Anyone else on here ever go out on a knocking van?
we had some dodgy fake ID from the “youth employment scheme” we would pull out and use as our pitch. There’d be about 10 of us and did we get into some shit. Some fucking hilarious stories. Did it for a while, more for a laugh than for the money but we use to make a few bob.
I remember we kicked off with some Tottenham fans in Broxbourne. we also threw a few punches at the Elephant and Castle with a little firm we ran into.
we were out of control back then.
Anyway, a different world back then, couldn’t get away with anything like that now. Not with all the camera’s everywhere.
Anyone else on here ever go out on a knocking van?
- Mad Ferret
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- BillyJenningsBoots
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Re: Knocking Van
easthammer wrote: ↑19 Dec 2024, 18:18 The subject matter of this thread "Knocking Van" has really taken me by surprise. As this is WHO I fully expected sordid stories of sexual adventures in the back of a roughly converted Transit. Failing that it was to be about the pitfalls of using cheap red diesel in the modern fuel injection engines.
What is happening to the standards on WHO![]()
They were out of control!!!
- easthammer
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Re: Knocking Van
The subject matter of this thread "Knocking Van" has really taken me by surprise. As this is WHO I fully expected sordid stories of sexual adventures in the back of a roughly converted Transit. Failing that it was to be about the pitfalls of using cheap red diesel in the modern fuel injection engines.
What is happening to the standards on WHO
What is happening to the standards on WHO
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Re: Knocking Van
Did come across like that, although I'm sure it was a recreation of what that actually did, ie ripping off old ladies and shouting "willies" out the van at passing girls. Was that one of your hilarious stories Nutsin?
- charleyfarley
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Re: Knocking Van
Dick Shaftsbury" wrote: ↑18 Dec 2024, 12:50
They must have shit a brick when you all piled out the back of the van armed with dusters and tea towels.
I heard they proper cleaned them right out.
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Re: Knocking Van
They must have shit a brick when you all piled out the back of the van armed with dusters and tea towels.
- WHU(Exeter)
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Re: Knocking Van
You gets teams of scousers coming down doing that now. Horrible, horrible cunts who give old people and women shit if they don’t buy anything but won’t say a word to a bloke. The line now is that they rehabilitated offenders raising money for a charity for rehabilitated Offenders. On reflection, its probably a fair description if you don’t use the legal definition of ‘charity’
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Re: Knocking Van
"Some fucking hilarious stories"
"....But I'm just going to tell you the boring bits"
"....But I'm just going to tell you the boring bits"
- BillyJenningsBoots
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Re: Knocking Van
Nutsin wrote: ↑18 Dec 2024, 00:13 Back in the day , early 80’s when I just left school I use to go out in the knocking van. We would usually meet up outside the Princess Alice boozer in Forest Gate and drive all over London selling household items, such as ironing board covers, pegs, dusters, dish’s clothes etc.
we had some dodgy fake ID from the “youth employment scheme” we would pull out and use as our pitch. There’d be about 10 of us and did we get into some shit. Some fucking hilarious stories. Did it for a while, more for a laugh than for the money but we use to make a few bob.
I remember we kicked off with some Tottenham fans in Broxbourne. we also threw a few punches at the Elephant and Castle with a little firm we ran into.
we were out of control back then.
Anyway, a different world back then, couldn’t get away with anything like that now. Not with all the camera’s everywhere.
Anyone else on here ever go out on a knocking van?
What a load of old bollocks!!! There's no way you had 9 mates....
To pretend that you and your camp friends were mincing around taking on "little firms" is absolutely laughable! Your ability to write stuff and make it sound like the gay ramblings of Charles Hawtry though commendable is utterly pathetic - but then you are just a sad lonely attention seeker and will make up anything to get it!
Tell us some of the "hilarious stories" and the shit you got in to - hmmm I am pretty sure there aren't any!!!
This should line in particular should go down as WHO Gold - "I remember we kicked off with some Tottenham fans in Broxbourne. we also threw a few punches at the Elephant and Castle with a little firm we ran into."

Did you write this standing in your drawing room, wearing your smoking jacket, whilst sipping a sherry? Who even talks like this........
"we were out of control back then." Oh stop it please my sides are aching......
To pretend that you and your camp friends were mincing around taking on "little firms" is absolutely laughable! Your ability to write stuff and make it sound like the gay ramblings of Charles Hawtry though commendable is utterly pathetic - but then you are just a sad lonely attention seeker and will make up anything to get it!
Tell us some of the "hilarious stories" and the shit you got in to - hmmm I am pretty sure there aren't any!!!
This should line in particular should go down as WHO Gold - "I remember we kicked off with some Tottenham fans in Broxbourne. we also threw a few punches at the Elephant and Castle with a little firm we ran into."
"we were out of control back then." Oh stop it please my sides are aching......
Last edited by BillyJenningsBoots on 18 Dec 2024, 11:26, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Knocking Van
It was around '83 we did it, there wasn't much work around in them days. The documentary on it a few of them were ICF. Yes there was a follow up on it. Something along the lines of' whatever happened to the knockers' which featured an interview with Andy.
Found it
Found it
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Re: Knocking Van
fraser wrote: ↑18 Dec 2024, 02:09 Yeah I did.
There was a documentary about in the 80s 'a knockers tale' I think it was called? with Andy Swallow and a couple of others I knew.
Ironing board covers where the best to sell.. Oven gloves, pegs, dish cloths, tea towels Christmas cards, dusyers. Could earn some decent money. Could also get nicked.
Bob Mills featured extracts from that knockers documentary on his In bed with me dinner show in the nineties including the fight with convenient sticks scene when they come across some muggy boneheads knocking on their patch.
I think there was also a follow up documentary ten years on.
I think there was also a follow up documentary ten years on.
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