West Ham vs Spurs | PL | 4.5.25 | Predictions and Match Thread

[stubbo-admin]

There won't have been too many matches this season where we go in as relatively strong favourites with this bookies, but the game this weekend is one.

Big Ange and his mates come to town, in a game that is most notable (as a footballing spectacle) for being between two teams that can lay claim to having had the most disappointing seasons across all of European football.

Few would have predicted either would be languishing where they are before a ball was kicked, but we go into this game as the 'worst of the rest' with the relegation places sewn up (thank fuck) and all that's left to play for the worst kind of bragging rights.

Let's hope at the end of this one we can be claiming whilst we might be shit, we're not as shit as the Lilleywhites from North London.

Team I'd like to see:

Areola

Wan Bissaka Mavropanos Todibo Scarles

Soucek Alvarez Paqueta

Bowen Fullkrug Kudus

I'd have Kilman out for this one. He's made some high profile cock ups in recent weeks, and Mavropanos is deserving of the start. JWP has been an ever present non-entity so I'd have the fight brought by Alvarez back for this one in a game where we're likely to be on the counter, with Paqueta looking his best in games when he's dropped back to make the play.  Soucek remains our second most likely goal threat so has to play, and the forward line looks so much more functional with the big German in.

It feels an easy team to pick, with the only real conundrum Scarles or Emerson...but I'd bring the home grown talent in for this one...quite simply it will mean more to him.

Prediction: 1-1

Feels like this will be a game with added meaning this season purely for the lack of other interest. Spurs of course are still fighting in Europe, but whilst their fans claim it's our cup final not theirs, they always seem pretty bothered when we fuck them over.

But continuing the theme of an unsatisfactory season, I'm going for an unsatisfactory result that helps no one, leaves ol' Cock Piss firmly mired in the critics sights, and sees us continue to limp towards the 24/25 finish line. 

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Match Centre:

Odds:
West Ham: 6/5
Draw: 13/5
Spurs: 2/1

Pre-Match Press Conference:
Official Press Conference

Tactical Preview: 
Babbling Irons

Watch-along:
Hammers Chat

Streams:

SportHD 

(With all live streams be mindful they can carry viruses etc.  Don't click on any ads and use a VPN).
  

[Ladysmith]

On a slightly different note there are a shit load of tickets up for sale.

If you are one of those not going then absolute shame on you.

If your reason for non attendance is financial then on the basis we are all masters of our own destiny then shame on you.

If your reason is that you no longer live in the area then hang your in shame for moving away.

It’s a biggest game of the season and we need a complete show!
 

[Fauxstralian]

I’m hoping Potter was hoping not to give them any ammunition 
Ideally we beat them & he comes out after & says I really meant I hope they get battered on and off the field next week

[GBHammer63]

I don’t want us to beat a second string Spurs team and crow, I’d want them playing their best and we beat them well. Either way if Potter sets up to contain them for a half, we’re done, and if he doesn’t start with Alvarez and Fullkrug we’ve got no bite. Many are losing faith in Potter and this is a big game for him, as for wishing Spurs well in the cup - do your homework you lazy cսnt.

[Mad Ferret]

1-3

[Massive Attack]

I'm slightly more positive we'll get a result now. Some good news at last.

[stubbo-admin]

Sounds like Spurs are to play their reserve team for this one, fully resting their first choices for the game in midweek.  Be very embarrassing if they turn us over.

[Massive Attack]

As I was explaining to my therapist: I'm expecting a rip-roaring 3-0 victory with goals from Kilman, Todibo and Coufal

You dreamer, the last time one of our Defenders scored a goal was 12 games ago, Emerson at Villa Park.

We're basically good at fuck all now. Well apart from specialising in Crab Football.  

[John Drake]

As I was explaining to my therapist: I'm expecting a rip-roaring 3-0 victory with goals from Kilman, Todibo and Coufal

[nychammer]

We really fucking better give this Lot a game tomorrow. None of this “blanket can only cover half of the body” malarkey from potter you make that it stretch and have the team put in a shift 

[F 129 Row66]

Spurs fans = Cunts

[Westham67]

Spurs will have one eye on the second leg of the semi-final and play a second team. I predict we are 6-0 up at 90 minutes and lose 6-7 from conceding goals in injury time time

[scott_d]

We need to start fast, none of this sideways passing and getting the feel of the game, go for their throats from the whistle.Then get stuck in hard and play full on for 90+ minutes. They'll be scared of picking up injuries. It's not rocket science.

 

This has been our biggest problem under all of our recent managers.

Fuck getting a feel of the game against the bottom teams at home.  Make the game and force the other team to have to get a feel of the game.

It's the negativity that is boring us.

[scott_d]

re-posted above with quotes.

[XKhammer]

I think the worst approach to your club is not caring what happens, and it's got to this stage with this manager. I honestly couldn't give a shit. The midget has succeeded yet again in killing any hope those of us with a working brain had in the future

But you haven't a working brain as a flat earther!

[oioi]

We need to start fast, none of this sideways passing and getting the feel of the game, go for their throats from the whistle.Then get stuck in hard and play full on for 90+ minutes. They'll be scared of picking up injuries. It's not rocket science.
 

[simons]

I’m in Spain at the weekend, and any other season I’d be gutted to miss this. This season finished when we went out to Villa in the cup. Problem is, we’ve been spoiled by the three previous seasons of European football. Yes the league football was still mainly shit, but we had that to keep us interested. 

[fraser]

Apart from maybe Bowen I don't think we've got a player who gives a shit whether we beat that mob or not.

Same old story .
Bowen is  now reminding  me of the Paul Allen days.

Whenever we have a top drawer player or two.. instead of building on it..we shit on it.
luckily Brooking ..Dev.. stretch....Parkes..JULIEN..geoffrey ..Tonka all stayed loyal ...

The cunts running the club are and always have been the issue 

Temperature is dropping Sunday and I won't be turning up... Bored shitless with it.. 

[northbankboy68]

How many will we concede in the first 5 and last 5 minutes?

[Mex Martillo]

Even our group of bored holiday makers will raise their game for this and get a win.
Thanks Stubbo 

[Monsieur merde de cheval]

Apart from maybe Bowen I don't think we've got a player who gives a shit whether we beat that mob or not.

Same old story .
Bowen is  now reminding  me of the Paul Allen days.

Whenever we have a top drawer player or two.. instead of building on it..we shit on it.
luckily Brooking ..Dev.. stretch....Parkes..JULIEN..geoffrey ..Tonka all stayed loyal ...

The cunts running the club are and always have been the issue 

[Monsieur merde de cheval]

All I know.. is that fraser  won't require a jacket for this one..
 don't turn up in a vest though  ffs.

1-1

[F 129 Row66]

Definitely a Ratchet  Paquetta (pen) Bowen 2 and fulkrg... fuck it The German.

[Mike Oxsaw]

3-3, thank you please.

[Ladysmith]

0-0

We'll likely play a low-block of 5 at the back against many of their kids.

And if he does manage to lose heavily, the Press conference after will no doubt be littered with plenty of swear words, more raspberry blowing and a possible suicide attempt LIVE on Sky. At that point I just hope they manage to reach for the microphone first before he tries to choke himself to death with it, before giving him his P45 and the remaining cushy compensation.

were you on KUMB as CMR?

[Massive Attack]

0-0

We'll likely play a low-block of 5 at the back against many of their kids.

And if he does manage to lose heavily, the Press conference after will no doubt be littered with plenty of swear words, more raspberry blowing and a possible suicide attempt LIVE on Sky. At that point I just hope they manage to reach for the microphone first before he tries to choke himself to death with it, before giving him his P45 and the remaining cushy compensation.