The Ashes.

[only1billybonds]

Just been announced that Josh Hazlewood will miss the first test due to start in Perth next Friday. This is a big blow to the Australians as they will already be without their captain and no.1 pace bowler Pat Cummins.

Englands preparations for the tour has been questioned by many as they have opted to play no warm up games aside from a one off against the English lions. 

Many are saying that its crucial that we get of to a good start in Perth which basically means we cant afford to lose seeing as the 2nd test in Brisbane is a day/night game ( fucking ridiculous) where the Aussies are strongly fancied.

Looking forward to this now but really unsure of how it will play out, I guess I'd still make them slight favourites due to home advantage. Going to be a few all nighters in the coming weeks for me, let's hope it'll be worth it.

[Fauxstralian]

Oliver Peake played in the previous winning u19 World Cup as a 17yo
Wouldnt be surprised if he is in the 2027 Ashes squad
Along with Campbell Kellaway & at least one of the fast bowlers who played in the 2024 u19 tournament .. Mahli Beardman & Callum Vidler

[violator]

Tom REW leads the yoot to a semi final victory over the convicts 

[Takashi Miike]

[Far Cough UKunt]

Yes five times.

[Nutsin]

Has England won a match yet? 


How about this Century, have they won the Ashes this Century?

[Fauxstralian]

Perth Scorchers win their 6th Big Bash title by 6 wickets in front of 55,000 at Optus Stadium
Steve Smith & Mitchell Starc in the Sydney opposition?
No problem for the Kings from the West

[Westham67]

Forgotten that Wright was selector
Always appeared that McCullum & Stokes picked the squad and stuck with it through thick & thin
Didnt have a fielding coach (& dropped endless catches) & think Saker was added at the last minute
Think they may have gone back to Troy Cooley now. 

Sri Lanka beat England by 19 runs in first ODI
Not quite sure why they are playing 3 ODI’s before 3 t20’s 
Its the t20 World Cup next so maybe 5 t20’s would be more use
As would leaving Sam Curran at Sydney for the rest of the t20 Big Bash finals

The three ODIs are a contractual obligation; those were the ODIs that were cancelled during Covid 19

[Fauxstralian]

Forgotten that Wright was selector
Always appeared that McCullum & Stokes picked the squad and stuck with it through thick & thin
Didnt have a fielding coach (& dropped endless catches) & think Saker was added at the last minute
Think they may have gone back to Troy Cooley now. 

Sri Lanka beat England by 19 runs in first ODI
Not quite sure why they are playing 3 ODI’s before 3 t20’s 
Its the t20 World Cup next so maybe 5 t20’s would be more use
As would leaving Sam Curran at Sydney for the rest of the t20 Big Bash finals

[Westham67]

The Ashes repercussions, starting with Luke Wright standing down to spend more time with family. More like falling on his sword. Shoaib was selected, having not played much red-ball cricket over the summer, and then did not get selected to play in a test match. Betthell was selected for the tour at number three without a  first-class 100, and then selected for a test match after the series was lost. 

The most riling thing for me and many others, I assume, was that throughout that Ashes series, they learned nothing about how bat in a test match when the game needs a batsman to hold up one end until the opening bowlers get tired and then start scoring or even wait for the first change bowlers to start. Brooks was the most gauling as a vice captain

[Eerie Decent]

Crawley has never needed to score any runs to stay in the team.

[Westham67]

Crawley is gone cheaply again. Hopefully, some newcomers for the summer series against New Zealand and Pakistan 

[Fauxstralian]

First of three ODI’s between Sri Lanka & England starts at 9am
D/N match so the England captain probably leaving the nightclub about now

[violator]

Thomas Rew will be annoyed at missing out with the bat, but he pouched 4 behind the timbers

[Fauxstralian]

U19 ODI World Cup going on in Zimbabwe at the moment 
Though you wouldn’t know it with the minimal coverage compared to say women’s cricket 
The next generation of international players …

England playing Scotland 
404/6 in 50 overs , which Scotland won’t make 
Ben Mayes of Hampshire 191 off 117 with 8 sixes 
 

[Fauxstralian]

Good to see most of the Australian Test players going straight back into the Big Bash
Khawaja 78 off 48 balls yesterday 
Alex Carey 71 off 39 today

Starc having a rest after playing all 5 Tests & Travis Head still in the pub

[Fauxstralian]

The multi millionaire Test cricket player Khawaja with wife & children in Australia?
Think he will play on for Queensland then probably get a media or coaching job
Or maybe use his pilots licence in some way
No, not aware that his plans involve moving to a country he hasn’t lived in for 30 years to keep goats

About as likely as Ben Stokes moving to NZ & opening a gay bar with a bo

[Eerie Decent]

Khawaja seems like he's gutted that he lives there.

I doubt he'll move back home though, weirdly?

[Fauxstralian]

All of those Australian players migrated as children with their families
Do you think 6yo Khawaja should have refused to leave Pakistan
The likes of Archer & Brydon C Arse were adult economic migrants recruited
Less said about the cultural appropriaton of BLONDE West Indian Bethell the better

[Takashi Miike]

[Westside]

My main criteria is we shouldn't have an Aussie coach/selector. 

The bragging ights are important on these things, and if the story is 'an Aussie wins the Ashes no matter what' then that doesn't feel a very tenable position.

Given that the convicts have to import Pakistanis, Saffers and Poms into their playing staff, to help them win the Ashes, I'm not bothered what nationality our coach is.

[Fauxstralian]

Got the impression Justin Langer was throwing his hat in the ring the other day
Sacked by London Spirit so think he still has an IPL job plus doing a bit of tv

[stubbo-admin]

My main criteria is we shouldn't have an Aussie coach/selector. 

The bragging ights are important on these things, and if the story is 'an Aussie wins the Ashes no matter what' then that doesn't feel a very tenable position.

[Fauxstralian]

They tried a South African in Mickey Arthur but not sure the cultures aligned
Asking the players to hand in homework assignments didn’t really fly

England don’t seem to trust English coaches.
Mens & womens  football , cricket
Must be demoralising for local coaches 

To be honest I’m not a fan of Andrew McDonald as coach & George Bailey as selector despite smashing the dopey Kiwi 
Id prefer Jason Gillespie & maybe Ponting as selector 
 

[Westside]

"England should have an English coach who gives a shit about winning the Ashes and is devastated when they don’t."

Every England Ashes series win this century (home and away) has come under the guidance of a foreign coach. One of those coaches, Andy Flower, lead England to the number 1 test ranking in 2011 (the last time England achieved that feat). He was never devastated when England lost an Ashes series though, as he had a 100% win ratio, in the Ashes series he was in charge for (series, not individual Ashes tetsts).

He even threw in a series win in India and  England's first limited over trophy (T20 World Cup), for good measure.

Maybe Australia should try a foreign coach. They then might win The Ashes in England again.

[Fauxstralian]

Was reading that the TMS woman who was challenged about being grumpy revealed that she was on her period
Cant recall that ever happening when Johnners Blowers & CMJ were in the box (so to speak)
The only women involved were delivering cakes to the chaps