Your Ten 2024 Football Predictions

[Billy Blagg]

"Here's mine: 1/ More black referees and women officials (I genuinely want to see if it changes players' attitudes toward officials) 3/ A booking for knee-slides as goal celebrations return to a ruffling of the hair. 4/ The first sending-off when a player punches a teammate for messing up his hair. 5/ A sending-off for anyone who puts their fingers to their lips after scoring 6/ A ten-match ban for anyone stuffing the football up their shirt, pretending they are pregnant while sucking their thumb. 6/ West Ham celebrating a win in Dublin (Bowen's last-minute knee slide celebration will be exempt from /3) 7/ Arsenal finishing behind anyone. 8/ Riots in the streets as Sin Bins combined with VAR give Premier League football its first abandoned game as nobody is left to kick a ball. 9/ England win the European Championship 10/ David Moyes is knighted"

[Nutsin]

6) we do the treble over Arsenal this season*

[Nutsin]

1) Paqueta stays 2) Moyes gets his new contract 3) city win the Prem 4) West Ham win another trophy 5) we finish top 6 6) we do the treble over Arsenal this year 7) vexed and Daveyg will continue to be wrong 8) Leicester win the Championship 9) West Ham end up with their highest point total ever 10) 49ers win the Super Bowl!

[Eastside surge]

"1. Saudi Arabia buy the premier league and re name it The "" if you moan you English pig dogs we'll chop your fucking hands off "" league 2 erm that's all ive got!"

[Gary Strodders shank]

"1) Eddie Howe Sacked 2) Ten bob Hag Sacked 3) Vincent Kompany Sacked 4) Mikel Arteta Sacked 5) Sean Dyche Sacked 6) Roy Hodgson Sacked 7) Mauricio Pochetino Sacked 8) Chris Wilder Sacked 9) Unai Emery resigns and joins Chelsea and is subsequently sacked 10) David Moyes is handed a new 4 year contract,wins PL manager of the year (by default) and is knighted for services to football Moyeball is officially recognised and adopted into a training module by the fa school of excellence at Lilleshall. No 11 Tottenham are still shit."

[Steady]

"West Ham to sign a 6’4 trans wonder striker called Carol Andy, good start to his/her/its career but turns out to be injury prone"

[Briano]

1. Liverpool to win the PL (after watching the game at Anfield last week. 2. Southampton to win the Championship (Flynn Downes doing the business) 3. Derby to win L1 4. Stockport to win L2 5.Bromley to win Conference 11 bags to 1 (thank me later)

[RM10]

No women commentators and refs in the men’s game.

[claypole]

The league to have no 2nd position but two 6th positions instead

[,]

1 England to win European Nations trophy. 2 WHU to win another European trophy 3 The rich to get richer. 4 Moyes leaves in the Summer. 5 Suella and Priti emigrate to Rwanda. 6 Another record breaking year climate wise. 7 Khan re elected as Mayor of London. 8 ULEZ price rise. 9 Fulsome praise on here for new manager’s style of play. 10 Moyes returns in the autumn.

[charleyfarley]

When we reach the FA Cup Final and the final of the Europa Cup and finish 6th in the League. Vexed will still be calling for Moyes's head

[wils]

"Great list Billy. 1. Moyes to rest players in the Dublin final citing the forthcoming league game against Luton which will determine 13th place in the league. 2.First Asian Trans referee in a mobility scooter in the premier league 3. Declan Rice telling the arsenal fans he never wanted to leave West Ham anyway when they criticise him for the team finishing below his former club 4. Avram Grant is spotted in the stands Moyes hits his 8th consequetive home defeat. 5. Goal music comes to West Ham with ""My old man's a dustman, he wears a dustmans's hat"" and the whole stadium do mimes to the words before slapping there thighs laughing. 6. Gary Lineker sacked after he is spotted exchanging fascist salutes with Di Canio in his local Tescos. 7. Antonia scores a goal in a one on one situation and Moyes criticises Fabianski for not making enough effort to stop it. 8. Sullivan dies and leaves his share of the club to teenage porn stars who bringing pole dancing for half time entertainment. 9. Danny Ings scores a goal on Fifa and the whole game crashes. 10. West Ham compete in the champions league for the first time after winning the Europa leage final against Liverpool with the youth team."