New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[arsene york-hunt]

"Her boyfriend kept insisting That she was in need of a fisting. The question just riles 'Cos she suffers with piles, But that didn't stop him persisting. Lineker's now back in the news, With the ire of the four be twos"

[Helmut Shown]

"So, Those marbles that Elgin did steal Belong to the Greeks, they do feel. Just a pile of rubble But wanted by the bubble Their envy they can't conceal Her boyfriend kept insisting That she was in need of a fisting"

[Helmut Shown]

"So, Those marbles that Elgin did steal Belong to the Greeks, they do feel. Just a pioe of rubble"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"A Chinaman called Wun Hung Lo, At night to the bingo he'd go He shouted out ""Rouse!"" In the style of a Scouse But still won a shit load of dough. So, Those marbles that Elgin did steal Belong to the Greeks, they do feel."

[arsene york-hunt]

"New Zealand will now not ban cigs I'm sure that's not good for the kids. The fags industry, Will make more money, Than when selling syrup of figs. A Chinaman called Wun Hung Lo, At night to the bingo he'd go"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"Thin toilet paper? Good for the planet? Personally I think they should ban it. There must be a word, For finger in turd, I think it might be digit-in-shit. New Zealand will now not ban cigs I'm sure that's not good for the kids."

[arsene york-hunt]

"Thin toilet paper? Good for the planet? Personally I think they should ban it. When your fingers go through, They get covered with poo, An arse spray would be much better than it. A Chinaman called Wun Hung Lo, At night to the bingo he'd go"

[Helmut Shown]

"The suits are all planning to fly To the Climate Change meeting, Dubai. While everyone smiles They gather air miles Their carbon footprint's sky high Thin toilet paper? Good for the planet? Personally I think they should ban it"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"Pete Townsend the dirty old get, Hasn't published his ""research"" yet. Little by little, It'll come in a trickle And still be quite damning, I'll bet. The suits are all planning to fly To the Climate Change meeting, Dubai."

[arsene york-hunt]

"On the subject of paedos, Gary Glitter In his gaol cell became very bitter, Jackson, Wyman, Townsend, Their fans still defend But mine have dropped me like their litter. Pete Townsend the dirty old get, Hasn't published his ""research"" yet."

[arsene york-hunt]

"On the subject of paedos, Gary Glitter In his gaol cell became very bitter, Jackson, Wyman, Townsend, Their fans still defend But mine have dropped me like their litter. Pete Townsend the dirty old get, Hasn't published his ""research"" yet."

[Helmut Shown]

"It is said that performer Rolf Harris, Was attracted to young girl's aris. Her mammary glands Met his wandering hands In the back of a Toyota Yaris On the subject of paedos, Gary Glitter In his gaol cell became very bitter"

[arsene york-hunt]

"In the bathroom shaving her quim She mistook the talc for the Vim Her sights not the best, She needs an eye test But she's also a little bit dim. It is said that performer Rolf Harris, Was attracted to young girl's aris."

[Helmut Shown]

"Her tits drooped right down past her knees, She thought ""These are bangers to please!"" She'd a cardiac arrest They punched below her breast she's now in a morgue deep freeze In the bathroom shaving her quim She mistook the talc for the Vim"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"A rent boys supporter called Jools. In the urinals peeped at blokes tools He gave a big grin At a floppy foreskin And a big pair of men's hairy gools. Her tits drooped right down past her knees, She thought ""These are bangers to please!"""

[arsene york-hunt]

"You Disagree? Then you are right wing! The twats on the left always sing, But your biggest sin Is hating Corbyn Then you're worse than Merciless Ming. A rent boys supporter called Jools. In the urinals peeped at blokes tools"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"He tells us that he has cut tax But energy costs stab us in our backs. My life is so dire, I can't light a fire So shiver at home on me jacks. You Disagree? Then you are right wing! The twats on the left always sing."

[Helmut Shown]

"It seems that many that lost do still cry, 'bout Brexit, but never say why. It gives them the shits ‘Cause we’re ruled by fuckwits Old Etonian, brexiteers and brainshy Football politics? I say enough Let’s have rhymes of tits arses and muff Let’s talk of old slags And soiled jamrags And men screwingbilly goat Gruff He tells us that he has cut tax But energy costs stab us in our backs"

[arsene york-hunt]

"It'll have to be one of those things Our forwards will be Mubama and Ings, But what ever you say, When were playing away Of shit displays, we are the kings. Football, politics? I say enough, Lets have rhymes of tits, arses and muff"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"It'll have to be one of those things Our forwards will be Mubama and Ings To avoid any drama, He'll leave out Mubama, And go with Cornet on the wings. It seems that many that lost do still cry, 'bout Brexit, but never say why."

[Hello Mrs. Jones]

"The Chancellor Jeremy Hunt Is not entirely upfront I know what you're thinking But that low I'm not sinking But if you insist, he's a cսnt It'll have to be one of those things Our forwards will be Mubama and Ings"

[Helmut Shown]

"A bloke that I know called Ray, Experimented being gay ‘Neath a hedge of privet He took the golden rivet He’s now not inclined that way The Chancellor Jeremy Hunt Is not entirely upfront"

[arsene york-hunt]

"There was an old man from Dover Famed for his excessive combover He sings from the Torah, Or at a Bar mitzvah And for feasts like the one at Passover. A bloke that I know called Ray, Experimented being gay."

[Helmut Shown]

"We're regressing, this once great nation, Is their no-one to stop mass migration? They let them all pass Refugees? My arse! The country's grand aberration There was an old man from Dover Famed for his excessive combover"

[arsene york-hunt]

"A policeman I know named Rick For a sex aid used his riot stick, Before they would cum He'd shove it up their bum. He said that it gave him a kick. We're regressing, this once great nation, Is their no-one to stop mass migration?"