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New Limerick Thread

Posted: 30 Aug 2014, 19:44
by les marteaux
Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 12 Aug 2024, 22:05
by Helmut Shown
"I once knew of a northern chap, Kept whippets and wore a flat cap But what made me laugh He kept coal in his bath So high it'd cover the tap A Babestation girl was so brash After midnight she'd flash the gash"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 12 Aug 2024, 19:27
by Mike Oxsaw
"I once knew of a northern chap, Kept whippets and wore a flat cap. Once worked down t'mine Would say ""Eyup, fine!"" But never liked hip-hop or rap. I must say I like it quite hot, But like this right now? Not a lot."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 12 Aug 2024, 14:46
by arsene york-hunt
"A hundred pound fine for swearing? How is Westhamonline preparing This arsehole of a thread,, Would be fucking well dead, I doubt any cսnt would be caring. I once knew of a northern chap, Kept whippets and wore a flat cap."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 12 Aug 2024, 12:12
by Helmut Shown
"Killer balls by Lucas Paqueta, Since Sir Trev. there's never been better But the FA conspires To thwart our desires Wouldn't happen to a big six jet-setter A hundred pound fine for swearing? How is Westhamonline preparing"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 11 Aug 2024, 18:28
by arsene york-hunt
"It seems traits of colour or sex Can make the same crimes more complex. In these violent times, The Chinese do most crimes, Follwed by the Swiss and the Czechs.. Killer balls by Lucas Paqueta, Since Sir Trev. there's never been better"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 11 Aug 2024, 10:37
by Mike Oxsaw
"Are the Hammers on the way up? A big win in the Betway Cup. As football games go, I found it quite slow In truth seemed a bit of a pup. It seems traits of colour or sex Can make the same crimes more complex."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 11 Aug 2024, 01:07
by arsene york-hunt
"If you get on the wrong party's side, You're in for a bumpy old ride Party Politics Is a game for pricks, And the working class they all deride. Are the Hammers on the way up? A big win in the Betway Cup."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 11 Aug 2024, 01:07
by arsene york-hunt
"If you get on the wrong party's side, You're in for a bumpy old ride Party Politics Is a game for pricks, And the working class they all deride. Are the Hammers on the way up? A big win in the Betway Cup."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 07 Aug 2024, 22:58
by Mike Oxsaw
"These riots we have every night, The MSM call them far right. They've been told to say that, So the senior site prat Can pontificate until it's daylight. If you get on the wrong party's side, You're in for a bumpy old ride"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 07 Aug 2024, 20:20
by arsene york-hunt
"In a lift I dropped a vile fart Causing everybody there to depart But my anal release Of some foul wet faeces Made the stench go right off the chart. These riots we have every night, The MSM call them far right"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 07 Aug 2024, 12:56
by Helmut Shown
"I'm having the Full English ""B"". Would feed an entire family You know what that means? A side order of beans! So later let your wind blow free In a lift I dropped a vile fart Causing everybody there to depart"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 07 Aug 2024, 12:49
by Helmut Shown
"I'm having the Full English ""B"". Would feed an entire family You know what that means? A side order of beans! So later let your wind blow free In a lift I dropped a vile fart Causing everybody tgere to depart"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 07 Aug 2024, 12:47
by Helmut Shown
"I'm having the Full English ""B"". Would feed an entire family You know what that means? A side order of beans! So later let your wind blow free In a lift I dropped a vile fart Causing everybody tgere to depart"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 06 Aug 2024, 23:10
by Mike Oxsaw
"A Dustman a tramp and two Vicars, In court for stealing girls knickers, They right got the horn As they were still being worn I'm told they were also arse-lickers. I'm having the Full English ""B"". Would feed an entire family"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 06 Aug 2024, 17:01
by arsene york-hunt
"I think it might just be a thriller, When we play at home to the Villa. There will be mishaps As too many gaps, We can't plug with Polyfilla. A Dustman a tramp and two Vicars, In court for stealing girls knickers,"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 05 Aug 2024, 19:24
by Mike Oxsaw
"Are the old players too set in their ways To play like Lopetegui plays? There's little/no doubt, We're soon to find out In only a matter of days. I think it might just be a thriller, When we play at home to the Villa"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 05 Aug 2024, 18:42
by Helmut Shown
"We did not look too good last night, In fact, I'd say we're fucking shite, You can always tell When left back's Cresswell there's no chance of a win in sight Are the old players too set in their ways To play like Lopetegui plays?"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 05 Aug 2024, 18:40
by Helmut Shown
"We did not look too good last night, In fact, I'd say we're fucking shite, You can always tell When left back's Cresswell there's no chance of a win in sight Are the old players too set in their ways To play like Lopetegui plays?"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 04 Aug 2024, 15:13
by arsene york-hunt
"The young girl just flicked up her skirt, Believing that is how you flirt. She'd learned from her Mum Who would flash her bum, When visited by Uncle Bert.. We did not look too good last night, In fact, I'd say we're fucking shite,"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 04 Aug 2024, 10:05
by Mike Oxsaw
"A sixteen stone boxer did state: ""I identify as a fly weight"". And so, as it goes I shall punch on the nose, All who do not think that's great. The young girl just flicked up her skirt, Believing that is how you flirt."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 03 Aug 2024, 16:41
by arsene york-hunt
"When you give a Tory donation You get contracts, enoblement and station If to Labour you give, Yourself you won't forgive, You'll get woke shit and mass immigration. A sixteen stone boxer did state: ""I identify as a fly weight""."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 02 Aug 2024, 20:59
by Helmut Shown
"So, what now can anyone do, To drag us all out of the poo? For a start, I would say Put the grifters away And freeze their bank accounts too When you give a Tory donation You get contracts, enoblement and station"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 02 Aug 2024, 15:18
by Mike Oxsaw
"The English, the English are are best, Not worth tuppence, all of the rest, They know what to do, Good manners and patient to queue Our ""leaders"" have ALL failed the test. So, what now can anyone do, To drag us all out of the poo?"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 02 Aug 2024, 14:58
by arsene york-hunt
"Just outside my window I've seen Something completely obscene. A Tom on a trick Sucking a bloke's dick, And rinsing out with Listerine. The English, the English are are best, Not worth tuppence, all of the rest, Lifted from Flanders and Swann again"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 02 Aug 2024, 08:56
by Mike Oxsaw
There was a young man callled Jack Who fingered his girlfriend's crack It was slimy and moist Just like Ally McCoist.... ....I may have to take that bit back. **Sorry MO you didn't leave the next two lines . Absolutely MY bad. Just outside my window I've seen Something completely obscene.