New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[Mike Oxsaw]

"Why is it, one supposes That middle eastern men have big noses Quite simple. You see, The air there is free At least that's what this bard proposes. Now Biden has fin'ly said ""Bye"" And many I guess will now cry."

[Helmut Shown]

"So, Reardon has made his last break, For some that is quite hard to take Some women he'll enslave When he rises from the grave Count Dracula, get a wooden stake! Why is it, one supposes That middle eastern men have big noses"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"On the front bench sat on her arse, That Rayner tart shows little class. An absolute whoosie Debates with her pussy Equality? An absolute farce. So, Reardon has made his lasy break, For some that is quite hard to take"

[arsene york-hunt]

"The unemployed knife thrower with only one eye Was depressed that he'd not learnt to cry, Was told by the chimps, ""Crying is for wimps, So why not just fuck off and die."" On the front bench sat on her arse, That Rayner tart shows little class."

[Alwaysaniron]

"A young zookeeper called Deborah Was caught doing things to a zebra Close your eyes, join in It's no longer a sin wanging your wand shouting abra cadabra The unemployed knife thrower with only one eye Was depressed that he'd not learnt to cry"

[Helmut Shown]

"This new geezer they call J,Lo Will it be worth starting to go. He's on the right track For us to attack No Moyesball to give us more woe A young zookeeper called Deborah Was caught doing things to a zebra"

[arsene york-hunt]

"There once was a young girl called Claire, Who left a snail trail on a chair. Some bits of it Had small flecks of shit, With random bits of pubic hair. This new geezer they call J,Lo Will it be worth starting to go."

[Mike Oxsaw]

"There was an old man from Strathclyde Liked putting things up his backside Tomato or plum, Guitar or bass drum, Insisting that God was his guide. There once was a young girl called Claire, Who left a snail trail on a chair."

[Helmut Shown]

"So. Taffy the First has resigned, I'm thinking ""Now, what is behind?"" He'll be able to console Ex MPs drawing dole Or is that me being unkind? There was an old man from Strathclyde Liked putting things up his backside"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"You'll wonder where the yellow went, If you brush your teeth with Pepsodent. If your strokes are too fast, It will leak out your arse To produce...an unpleasant scent. So. Taffy the First has resigned, I'm thinking ""Now, what is behind?"""

[arsene york-hunt]

"So as the season approaches we pray That we'll get back to the 'old' West Ham way What that means, who knows? But the punter who goes, Knows pain, disappointment, dismay. You'll wonder where the yellow went, If you brush your teeth with Pepsodent"

[Alwaysaniron]

"Gibraltar is back in the news, As the Spanish team sing out their views. But none of us cares Cause it's our and not theirs So they can complain to whoever they choose. So as the season approaches we pray That we'll get back to the 'old' West Ham way"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"This Vance bloke's a small minded runt To the right of the National Front. He says we're Islamic A typical Yank panic His language of choice is to grunt. Gibraltar is back in the news, As the Spanish team sing out their views."

[Helmut Shown]

Now Southgate has a decision to make It had better be right for fucks sake He's now cut the cord And fell on his sword Now fuck off and jump in the lake This Vance bloke's a small minded runt To the right of the National Front

[Helmut Shown]

Now Southgate has a decision to make It had better be right for fucks sake He's now cut the cord And fell on his sword Now fuck off and jump in the lake This Vance bloke's a small minded runt To the right of the National Front

[Alwaysaniron]

Now Southgate has a decision to make It had better be right for fucks sake

[Alwaysaniron]

Van der Vaart thinks that Declan is shit The sour graped Netherlands tit Whilst the Gooners have ruined the lad He's still not half bad Better than you've ever been you Dutch git. No Southgate has a decision to make It had better be right for fucks sake

[Helmut Shown]

"In a sane country they would dump, Both Joe Biden and Donald Trump The geriatric pair Don’t have a prayer Of remembering their last stiffened stump Van der Vaart thinks that Declan is shit The sour graped Netherlands tit"

[arsene york-hunt]

"If he'd died there would be no dispute 'bout his gun laws on the statute, The right to be armed Loads of schoolkids it's harmed, But he gets just blood on his suit. In a sane country they would dump, Both Joe Biden and Donald Trump"

[Helmut Shown]

The US election draws near. Donald Trump's been shot in the ear Should he be reelected with this organ affected He'll listen to no one I fear If he'd died there would be no dispute 'bout his gun laws on the statute

[Helmut Shown]

The US election draws near. Donald Trump's been shot in the ear Should he be reelected with this organ affected He'll listen to no one I fear If he'd died there would be no dispute 'bout his gun laws on the statute

[arsene york-hunt]

"I'm sitting here, as the sun rises, Just waiting for today's surprises. Thinking of football, We will win fuck all, And be beaten by Spain, one surmises. The US election draws near. Donald Trump's been shot in the ear"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"There was a young man called Billy Who was born with a micro willy Whilst only a stump, He still got the hump: For it vanished completely when chilly. I'm sitting here, as the sun rises, Just waiting for today's surprises."

[arsene york-hunt]

"He decided what to have for dessert Was high up inside a girl's skirt When he got past her knee He could smell anchovy, Her minge looked caked with yoghurt. There was a young man called Billy Who was born with a micro willy ."

[Helmut Shown]

So. MPs - out-voted old knobs Are scrambling around for new jobs With their penchant for buggery And financial skullduggery They could sell their bums to the nobs He decided what to have for dessert Was high up inside a girl's skirt