New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[Helmut Shown]

VAR said it wasn't handball From them we mostly get fuck all. Imagine the dismay Watching us play That cսnt Dean doing the trawl As our attack advances We get a shitload of chances

[arsene york-hunt]

"There was a young lady called Annie Cut herself shaving her fanny, An arterial gusher, Her death it would usher, The loss of her blood was uncanny. VAR said it wasn't handball From them we mostly get fuck all."

[Helmut Shown]

"Her bangers drooped down to her knees And swayed a fair bit in a breeze Her beau thought it witty To grab at her titty And the bastard never said ""please"" There was a young lady called Annie Cut herself shaving her fanny"

[Helmut Shown]

"Her bangers drooped down to her knees And swayed a fair bit in a breeze Her beau thought it witty To grab at her titty And the bastard never said ""please"" There was a young lady called Annie Cut herself shaving her fanny"

[Mike Oxsaw]

A middle aged lady called Brenda Liked fondling a young girls pudenda To show she had class She'd fist-fuck her arse And give the kid much to remember. Her bangers drooped down to her knees And swayed a fair bit in a breeze

[arsene york-hunt]

"Helmut Shown 9:34 Sun Oct 23 Ha ha ha! Best one on here for a long time. There was an old man from York Who was giving his missus a pork, It was his bad luck His priapic dick stuck So they prised it out with a fork. A middle aged lady called Brenda Liked fondling a young girls pudenda"

[arsene york-hunt]

"Helmut Shown 9:34 Sun Oct 23 Ha ha ha! Best one on here for a long time. There was an old man from York Who was giving his missus a pork, It was his bad luck His priapic dick stuck So they prised it out with a fork. A middle aged lady called Brenda Liked fondling a young girls pudenda"

[Helmut Shown]

"An Indian man Mr. Singh. Was caught shoving things up his ring. A squash, a potato The complete works of Plato But the scotch bonnet didn't half sting There was an old man from York Who was giving his missus a pork"

[arsene york-hunt]

"There once was a man from Peru Noticed he had shit on his shoe, It was just his Karma, As he kicked his pet llama When it refused him a scew. An Indian man Mr. Singh. Was caught shoving things up his ring."

[Helmut Shown]

"So fuck all the political classes, Let's have rhymes about tits, Twats and arses But when I think of a cսnt Boris Johnson's in front Presiding tge Conservative farces There once was a man from Peru Noticed he had shit on his shoe"

[arsene york-hunt]

"Rejection of democracy is wrong Why can’t we all get along, These words are right, And I will if I might, Use them as lines in a song. So fuck all the political classes, Let's have rhymes about tits, Twats and arses"

[Johnson]

Our system of representation Demonstrably ruins our nation But the people they voted And PR rejection was noted But that doesn’t stop comma crying Rejection of democracy is wrong Why can’t we all get along

[,]

"Now from this tory oligarchy, Will we have as PM our first darkie? Whoever they choose This country will lose Due to usual Tory malarkey Our system of representation Demonstrably ruins our nation"

[arsene york-hunt]

"He’s fucked up in every job For me Boris Johnson’s a knob, This gross indecision. Treat the plebs with derision, I'm off for a tea and hobnob. Now from this tory oligarchy, Will we have as PM our first darkie? ."

[Helmut Shown]

"Dawn Butler, Lammy and Rayner, Disaster awaits, nothing plainer. But public school twots In ministerial spots For me it is a no-brainer He’s fucked up in every job For me Boris Johnson’s a knob"

[arsene york-hunt]

"How do we get out of this mess? An idea? A thought? Just a guess? And the biggest fear, Is that prick Sir Kier, Cashing in on this fucking mess. Dawn Butler, Lammy and Rayner, Disaster awaits, nothing plainer."

[Mike Oxsaw]

"God help us if Bozo comes back To keep the decline back on track. But we are ALL far too busy, Which is how we got Lizzie And the rest at the Houses of Cack. How do we get out of this mess? An idea? A thought? Just a guess?"

[Helmut Shown]

"Now that Liz Truss has departed, The race for her job is half hearted As they rattle their sabre Its the fault of Labour Its taken twelve years to get started God help us if Bozo comes back To keep the decline back on track"

[arsene york-hunt]

"It is said that nude model Katie Price Shaved her fanny to combat the lice And Dwight Yorke you see, Is the dad of Har-vey But claims to have fucked her just twice. Now that Liz Truss has departed, The race for her job is half hearted"

[Helmut Shown]

"There once was a fellow called Roy, Who worked as a Kings Road rent boy. When he shits there's no strain On his seat a big stain On trousers of corduroy It is said that nude model Katie Price Shaved her fanny to combat the lice"

[arsene york-hunt]

"A man from The Elephant & Castle Had a boil on one cheek of his arsehole, On another note he, Hates his local MP, And once sent him shit in a parcel. There once was a fellow called Roy, Who worked as a Kings Road rent boy."

[arsene york-hunt]

"A man from The Elephant & Castle Had a boil on one cheek of his arsehole, On another note he, Hates his local MP, And once sent him shit in a parcel. There once was a fellow called Roy, Who worked as a Kings Road rent boy."

[Helmut Shown]

"I know an unorthodox man, Uses horseradish sauce on lamb Something he likes Sniffing saddles of bikes Once sat on by an eighty year old gran A man from The Elephant & Castle Had a boil on one cheek of his arsehole"

[arsene york-hunt]

"A poster who now lives abroad, Has done so 'cos he can't afford, He depends on on mummy, She took him and he, Can't cut the umbilical cord. I know an unorthodox man, Uses horseradish sauce on lanb."

[Mike Oxsaw]

"There once was a strange man from Fife, Who paid men to roger his wife. This might seem quite queer, But he's posted on here, And like most of us ain't got a life. A poster who now lives abroad, Has done so 'cos he can't afford"