West Ham Online

My vote goes to a song sung at Arsenal to the tune of Rule Britannia:

Good old Arsenal,
We're proud to sing that name.
While we sing this song,
We'll win the game.

Arsenal were playing in a big final, and because they didn't have a song. The Big Match had a competition for fans to write the words to Land of Hope and Glory. They were prevented from this by the Elgar Society, and in the absence of sufficient time, Jimmy Hill wrote the above songs lyrics.

The sad thing about this is that it is still being sung, as I heard it watching some Arsenal highlights last week.
 

So, how did chants suddenly spring into life in the pre-internet/pre-mobile phone days?

Almost every week large sections of the crowd would come out with a topical corker, often generating an instant, equally topical retort.

It seems that now, on-line, every suggestion is shit, even before it's been posted up.

I can't believe no one has mentioned " on the ball city " sung by  Norwich fans! The height of cringe!

SurfaceAgentX2Zero wrote: ↑28 Mar 2025, 15:22 Any song sung about Chelsea when we are playing someone else.

You might as well wear a hat saying, 'Chelsea are bigger and more famous and more successful than us and they really boil our piss'.

Songs about Fat Frank are OK, of course.

Pav BML" wrote: ↑28 Mar 2025, 14:43 Unfortunately, been a while since we've had any good new ones. Big fucking German? Jesus christ..

 

Any song sung about Chelsea when we are playing someone else.

You might as well wear a hat saying, 'Chelsea are bigger and more famous and more successful than us and they really boil our piss'.

Songs about Fat Frank are OK, of course.

'insert any town here 's a shithole, I wanna go home. Boring, shit song. Same applies for how shite must you be we're winning away/ at home. Oh when the spurs boring slow version that they tried to make a club anthem. North London forever, cringey. 
You could pretty much pick any Arsenal or Spurs song, all a poor rip off version of other teams. Palace just a weird monotonous European song selection. 
I think Man Utd are the only one that come up with decent new ones on a semi regular basis. 
Unfortunately, been a while since we've had any good new ones. Big fucking German? Jesus christ..

Council Scum" wrote: ↑28 Mar 2025, 14:06 Us singing the Ludo song, it never made sense, we are nearer to Moscow than where he was born.

He played for us, we sang it, he left, we never sang it again.
He came back as a coach, we sang it, he left in 2010 and we still sing it now.....

For me is sums up just how shit our support is these days, that we have to go back to songs like that. 

Us singing the Ludo song, it never made sense, we are nearer to Moscow than where he was born.

He played for us, we sang it, he left, we never sang it again.
He came back as a coach, we sang it, he left in 2010 and we still sing it now.....

For me is sums up just how shit our support is these days, that we have to go back to songs like that. 

The what do you think of Tottenham chant is terrible, but I’ve never heard it chanted by West Ham fans. I heard it in the Arsenal end during the FA Youth Cup final.

Swiss. wrote: ↑28 Mar 2025, 10:07

chevy chase" wrote: ↑28 Mar 2025, 09:41 I’m forever blowing bubbles to the tune of chitty chitty bang bang.   fuck sake

Love that song and Chevy Chase was never funny. 

You need to take care when reminiscing about traditional football chants from earlier days (that, from personal experience, were always accepted as terrace baiting & banter whether for or against you).

The wokerati won't like those memories one bit and you (YOU) could end up cancelled (CANCELLED) for having them.

Swiss. wrote: ↑28 Mar 2025, 10:07

chevy chase" wrote: ↑28 Mar 2025, 09:41 I’m forever blowing bubbles to the tune of chitty chitty bang bang.   fuck sake

Love that song and Chevy Chase was never funny. 

chevy chase" wrote: ↑28 Mar 2025, 09:41 I’m forever blowing bubbles to the tune of chitty chitty bang bang.   fuck sake

Russ of the BML" wrote: ↑28 Mar 2025, 08:30 I like alot of the traditional songs. Yes, they are a bit naff but they come from a different era and do have a romantic innocent charm about them. 

But, going back to the thread, without a fucking shadow of a fucking doubt the most fucking shit song is that fucking Mauled by the Tigers by Hull City. Grown men doing clawing actions as well. Fuck me, they all deserve to be thrown into a mass grave and buried alive. 

I’m forever blowing bubbles to the tune of chitty chitty bang bang.   fuck sake

Rubble again" wrote: ↑27 Mar 2025, 20:17 Not the worst, probably the best for me although I wasn't there to hear it ...

Your crap
Your broke
Your manager's had a stroke
Going down, going down ...

Birmingham away 2003

 

I like alot of the traditional songs. Yes, they are a bit naff but they come from a different era and do have a romantic innocent charm about them. 

But, going back to the thread, without a fucking shadow of a fucking doubt the most fucking shit song is that fucking Mauled by the Tigers by Hull City. Grown men doing clawing actions as well. Fuck me, they all deserve to be thrown into a mass grave and buried alive. 

Mauled by the tigers would get my vote too.

although the most ridiculous with the context, was being in a Bristol pub that had the Bristol City vs Rovers derby match on the TV and some City fans singing ‘over land and sea’, when the ground was a 30 minute walk away and far from sold out.

I seem to remember a chant about putting Johnny Owen in a box . Someone I’m sure will enlighten me . 

The rent boys singing Chelsea Chelsea Chelsea.

Not the worst, probably the best for me although I wasn't there to hear it ...

Your crap
Your broke
Your manager's had a stroke
Going down, going down ...

Birmingham away 2003
 

honky cat" wrote: ↑27 Mar 2025, 13:59

Gary Strodders shank" wrote: ↑27 Mar 2025, 13:22 Leeds fans "Jimmy Saville he's one of our own" must be up there.



 

 

Was it west ham singing 'you'll never catch the rip-per" up there?

I think most of the songs mentioned are ok - the naff ones are ironic or self deprecating humour. Only a man completely comfortable in his own skin can support Hull, have a few pints and do the tiger claw thing.

There was a few ripper songs going about up there back in the day.

On a similar note Watford fans used to sing about Fred West to my old mate Derek Payne who bore a striking resemblance.

Bizarrely he seemed to embrace this even doing a digging action as a goal celebration.





 

Gary Strodders shank" wrote: ↑27 Mar 2025, 13:22 Leeds fans "Jimmy Saville he's one of our own" must be up there.


 

Was it west ham singing 'you'll never catch the rip-per" up there?

I think most of the songs mentioned are ok - the naff ones are ironic or self deprecating humour. Only a man completely comfortable in his own skin can support Hull, have a few pints and do the tiger claw thing.



 

This is pretty naff, and it's been nicked from the sporting wing of the IRA (Celtic)

All the shit teams that sing "by far the greatest team, the world has ever seen".

It's quite comical when you hear the likes of Bristol City singing it.