New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[Helmut Shown]

"A girl with a very pert arse, Sat next to me on the grass As she raised up her hips I saw pussy lips I think she's a bit of a brass Shoplifting a citywide trait If in Liverpool you colocate"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"Stories of Jesus on the cross, Considered these days to be dross, But the ones not to miss Are of him on the piss If you do, afraid it's your loss. A girl with a very pert arse, Sat next to me on the grass"

[arsene york-hunt]

"One night he awoke with a start He'd just dropped a very loud fart The consequence dire, Caused his wife to expire As she had a very weak heart. Stories of Jesus on the cross, Considered these days to be dross,"

[arsene york-hunt]

"One night he awoke with a start He'd just dropped a very loud fart The consequence dire, Caused his wife to expire As she had a very weak heart. Stories of Jesus on the cross, Considered these days to be dross,"

[Helmut Shown]

Its clear Paqueta will be barred All for a phony yellow card But if you're one of the six And their FFP tricks You have a free pass safeguard One night he awoke with a start He'd just dropped a very loud fart

[Hello Mrs. Jones]

Political donors are in the fast lane treasury coffers they're allowed to drain For all of my life Corruption’s been rife I think I’ll just fuck off to Spain Its clear Paqueta will be barred All for a phony yellow card

[Helmut Shown]

"The Chinese are very democratic The have election each day, automatic. Russians vote with their feet They fall to the street Being pushed from a hotel attic Political donors are in the fast lane treasury coffers they're allowed to drain"

[arsene york-hunt]

"Rishi while stood in the rain His speech drowned by a refrain, Thinking this job, it's shit Let fucking Kier do it. I'm off for a line of cocaine. The Chinese are very democratic The have election each day, automatic."

[Helmut Shown]

"Sorry, kept getting "" Bad Gateway"""

[Helmut Shown]

"Sorry, kept getting "" Bad Gateway"""

[Helmut Shown]

"A confused young man called Vance, Took it up the tradesman's entrance This poor young creature And a public school teacher I hear it's quite fashionable in France Rishi while stood in the rain His speech drowned by a refrain"

[Helmut Shown]

"A confused young man called Vance, Took it up the tradesman's entrance This poor young creature And a public school teacher I hear it's quite fashionable in France Rishi while stood in the rain His speech drowned by a refrain"

[Helmut Shown]

"A confused young man called Vance, Took it up the tradesman's entrance This poor young creature And a public school teacher I hear it's quite fashionable in France Rishi while stood in the rain His speech drowned by a refrain"

[arsene york-hunt]

"So. Sushi has called an election, And Starmer now has an erection. He seems a good bet, But with him you get, Lammy, Raynor, (ecconomic disaster, assorted islamists who want to take over, race baiters, people who want to flood the country with more illegals, people who think toerags have a right to disrupt ordinary peoples rights with violent demonstrations, antisemitism still going strong, a party of misfits who have contempt for white working people),and those of that complexion. Might have miscalculated the number of sylables there. A confused young man called Vance, Took it up the tradesman's entrance"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"Loppy has spring cleaned the gaff And sorted the wheat from the chaff. We've still got some stubble, That could cause us trouble, And that would be awfully naff. So. Sushi has called an election, And Starmer now has an erection."

[Hello Mrs. Jones]

"The doctor had no hesitation, Childhood reflex anal dilation His step father, Sid Had molested the kid In the toilets behind the bus station Loppy has spring cleaned the gaff And sorted the wheat from the chaff"

[arsene york-hunt]

"She wouldn't let it define her Low hanging flaps of her vagina So she went off to see, A bloke for FMG, What once looked a mess, now looks finer. The doctor had no hesitation, Childhood reflex anal dilation"

[Helmut Shown]

"His new cleaning lady Miss Parks, Refused to hand wash his skid marks The shit made a pattern Like the rings of Saturn And the piss like a school of sharks She wouldn't let it define her Low hanging flaps of her vagina"

[arsene york-hunt]

"So Chelsea now need a new boss. I must say...I don't give a toss. Despite all of their dosh, They've been under the cosh, The football was just fucking dross. His new cleaning lady Miss Parks, Refused to hand wash his skid marks"

[Mike Oxsaw]

A young man expelled from his school For walking round holding his tool. It's not a good feature If you are a new teacher But the young girls all thought he was cool. So Chelsea now need a new boss. I must say...I don't give a toss.

[Helmut Shown]

Was desperate for defaecation But nothing touched his constipation Donning my IPod I pulled on my rod And shat! You just need syncopation A young man expelled from his school For walking round holding his tool

[arsene york-hunt]

** Constipation

[arsene york-hunt]

"Now, a plane that was named the three sevens Decided to drop from the heavens. Nothing to see here It's routine, I fear, Boeing have not learned their lessons. Was desperate for defaecation But nothing touched his constipatin"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"Most women shot putters take drugs And definitely like to munch rugs Dildos up the shitter, To keep them much fitter And pussies that leave trails like slugs. Now, a plane that was named the three sevens Decided to drop from the heavens."

[Hello Mrs. Jones]

"There was a young girl called Patience, Could play tunes with her flatulence Although I’m a bard This rhyme is hard And not met with my normal complacence Most women shot putters take drugs And definitely like to munch rugs"