New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[BRANDED]

There was a young man from Wilmslow whose balls hung decidedly low So circus it was to display all the fuss Of the bollocks of poor old Zero Some cսnt from the Welsh Town of Rhyl Showed his arse to a girl on the pill

[SurfaceAgentX2Zero]

"arsene york-hunt 10:25 Tue Jun 5 'There was once a young 'person' from Rheims Had a cock and a fanny, it seems. His arse was quite tight for a hermaphrodite So (s)he looked not too bad in blue jeans There was a young man from Wilmslow whose balls hung decidedly low"

[arsene york-hunt]

"I sat with a lady from France Who took a big dump at the dance, The outpouring of shit Caused her a grand mal fit, Now she's walking around in a trance. There was once a young 'person' from Rheims Had a cock and a fanny, it seems."

[arsene york-hunt]

"I sat with a lady from France Who took a big dump at the dance, The outpouring of shit Caused her a grand mal fit, Now she's walking around in a trance. There was once a young 'person' from Rheims Had a cock and a fanny, it seems."

[SurfaceAgentX2Zero]

"Mike Oxsaw 1:37 Tue Jun 5 My hedgerow exhibits a bustle, Two maidens are having a tussle. A groan and a grunt and a strong smell of cսnt It sure wasn't winkle or mussel I sat with a lady from France Who took a big dump at the dance"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"A brash young lady from Stoke A divorcee in need of a poke So, she jumped on a plane And fucked off to Spain. Now. Somewhere in there is a joke... My hedgerow exhibits a bustle, Two maidens are having a tussle."

[Helmut Shown]

"There was a girl from Santa Fe, Who worked teaching kids in the day At night she would hop On a glass table top And shit for those willing to pay A brash young lady from Stoke A divorcee in need of a poke"

[arsene york-hunt]

"My current girl is a top model. This ""pulling fit birds"" is a doddle, She comes from Peru, Advertises shampoo Her last bloke was fucking Glen Hoddle. There was a girl from Santa Fe, Who worked teaching kids in the day."

[Mike Oxsaw]

"There was a young lady called Chloe No morals and awfully showy If you gave her enough She's whip out her muff. Bit more and she'd give you a blowie. My current girl is a top model. This ""pulling fit birds"" is a doddle"

[Alfie]

Tits of the owl Bollocks of the ocelot I appreciate That really is a fucking Lot of animal genitalia To consider: Vulva of the goose Even bigger animal Visions Naughty bits Squirrels risen.

[Helmut Shown]

A woman in the sex industry Gave a topless relief once to me. Then opening her flower Gave a golden shower I went home smelling of pee There was a young lady called Chloe No morals and awfully showy

[arsene york-hunt]

"Do we sell before we can buy? As purchases go often awry Kick out the dead wood, Bring in those who are good, Fingers crossed, we can only but try. A woman in the sex industry Gave a topless relief once to me."

[Helmut Shown]

There once was a rentboy called Sid. Gave blow jobs for less than ten quid He had syph on his gums Through rimming of bums With a forward from Real Madrid Do we sell before we can buy? As purchases go often awry

[arsene york-hunt]

"Like so many other whores She went on the street with no drawers, She was part of a faction, Who were ready for action, When they plied their trade out of doors. There once was a rentboy called Sid. Gave blow jobs for less than ten quid"

[Helmut Shown]

There was a young man from Diss Had drunk far too much Guinness He had to submit To a follow-through shit As he stood while taking a piss Like so many other whores She went on the street with no drawers

[arsene york-hunt]

"After a particularly violent cough He had to take his underwear off, Then this Chelsea slag Put his pants in a bag. Too much bumming I fear, had this toff. There was a young man from Diss Had drunk far too much Guinness."

[Helmut Shown]

There once was a young man called Gus Shit himself upstairs on a bus After dropping his chips Donned bicycle clips 'cause he didn't want to make a fuss After a particularly violent cough He had to take his underwear off

[arsene york-hunt]

"Some of our team outbound? With the vultures circling around, They're after the thrill, Of snapping up Hugil, In the transfer merry go round. There once was a young man called Gus Shit himself upstairs on a bus"

[Helmut Shown]

"A Ritalin victim named John, His arse'ole virginity gone The poor boy's deflated His anus dilated With a cushion he's sat upon Some of our team outbound? With the vultures circling around"

[arsene york-hunt]

"Where are the players with flair All disappeared in thin air, This gaping schism Leads to dour pragmatism, Entertainment? They just don't care. A Ritalin victim named John, His arse,ole virginity gone"

[Helmut Shown]

"Pity for Steve Bruce, just a bit? No fuck him the mouthy fat shit He spoils our enjoyment And needs unemployment A manager? A total counterfeit Where are the players with flair All disappeared in thin air"

[arsene york-hunt]

"The mickeys have fuck all to show Kiev was a long way to go. I know an old fool Supports Liverpool Who was born and brought up in Bow. Pity for Steve Bruce, just a bit? No fuck him the mouthy fat shit"

[Mike Oxsaw]

There once was a geezer called Parkes Looked in his pants and saw skid marks This product of fart Was like modern art In patterns of straight lines and arcs The mickeys have fuck all to show Kiev was a long way to go.

[arsene york-hunt]

"A young man from north of Nebraska Used to stuff his face with baked Alaska, He's too fucking fat, To play with the cat, And sits round drinking ayahuasca.* *An hallucinogenic tea. There once was a geezer called Parkes Looked in his pants and saw skid marks"

[arsene york-hunt]

"A young man from north of Nebraska Used to stuff his face with baked Alaska, He's too fucking fat, To play with the cat, And sits round drinking ayahuasca.* *An hallucinogenic tea. There once was a geezer called Parkes Looked in his pants and saw skid marks"