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New Limerick Thread
Posted: 30 Aug 2014, 19:44
by les marteaux
Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 18 Jan 2018, 12:57
by Helmut Shown
"An eye for an eye screamed a tramp When on his mates groin he did stamp ""You've pissed my sleeping bag You dirty fucking slag Now its permanently damp"" As he prepared to go down on his girl Both a cock and a cսnt did unfurl"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 18 Jan 2018, 09:51
by Kaiser Zoso
Here was a fake Turk called Nick Who got on everyone’s wick His bird was a model He thought it’s a doddle But he just makes everyone sick
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 18 Jan 2018, 09:43
by HairyHammer
At an inopportune time I farted And couldn't stop once I had started An embarrassing bane I was on a packed train Next stop rudely off I was carted. An eye for an eye screamed a tramp When on his mates groin he did stamp
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 18 Jan 2018, 05:50
by Far East Hammer
A man trav'lling the DLR Dropped a huge turd in the front car An ungodly sight Quite late at night And with a stench carrying far At an inopportune time I farted And couldn't stop once I had started
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 18 Jan 2018, 03:48
by arsene york-hunt
"A doctor who lied for the Trump Said he's fitter than Forrest Gump, He did it in hope, Of a brown envelope, The sum to be all in one lump. A man trav'lling the DLR Dropped a huge turd in the front car"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 18 Jan 2018, 00:43
by HairyHammer
I used to turn left on the plane. I don't think I'll do it again. The pilots go mental As they want to fly central So now I will hijack a train. A doctor who lied for the Trump Said he's even fitter than Forrest Gump
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Jan 2018, 22:37
by Mike Oxsaw
"A lady from the Shetland isles Tried a new cure for her piles A serious go, On a massive dildo; The squelching could be heard for miles. I used to turn left on the plane. I don't think I'll do it again."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Jan 2018, 22:19
by Helmut Shown
"Walking in from Hackney Wick, I saw something that made me sick. In a public place She pissed on his face And he cleaned her off with a lick A lady from the Shetland isles Tried a new cure for her piles"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Jan 2018, 18:06
by arsene york-hunt
"Now. Can we advance in the cup? Or will the club sell us a pup? Based on tonight's show You'd have to say no, They only care about staying up. Walking in from Hackney Wick, I saw something that made me sick."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 16 Jan 2018, 21:19
by Mike Oxsaw
"I can not make any sense of it, When playing shit teams we play shit As long as we play The old West Ham way The fans really don't mind a bit Now. Can we advance in the cup? Or will the club sell us a pup?"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 13 Jan 2018, 16:05
by arsene york-hunt
"I can not make any sense of it, When playing shit teams we play shit"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 13 Jan 2018, 16:00
by arsene york-hunt
"A milf eyed a donkey's big shlong Her mind in place oh so wrong, Playing Animal Farm Now caused her alarm, She had fear while removing her thong. I can not make any sense of it, When playing shit teams and we play shit"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 13 Jan 2018, 10:38
by HairyHammer
Her mind in a place oh so wrong
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 13 Jan 2018, 04:16
by HairyHammer
A working girl from San Diago Suffered quite a bit from Lumbago So she;d just wank and suck As No way she could fuck And for extras made dildo's from playdough. A milf eyed a donkey's big shlong Her mind in place oh so wrong
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 13 Jan 2018, 03:29
by arsene york-hunt
"This transfer they won't be too tight The best of the best in their sight. If you think that my friend, You're a total bell end, In bullshit, I think, you delight. A working girl from San Diago Suffered quite a bit from Lumbago"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 13 Jan 2018, 02:34
by HairyHammer
"A prostitute in Pattaya, Was picked up by a bricklayer. She had big hairy thighs And a touch strong and wise But her Cock meant no go for this player. This transfer they won't be too tight The best of the best in their sight."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 12 Jan 2018, 21:28
by arsene york-hunt
"You know when Trump's talking shit His lips are moving a bit A very strange man, Daft hair and fake tan, He looks quite a bit of a tit. A prostitute in Pattaya, Was picked up by a bricklayer."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 12 Jan 2018, 10:31
by Helmut Shown
Our owner loves the sound of his voice. From he's posh mansion close to Theydon Bois But his teenage son Jack Tweets a load of old cack He should be told to go back to his toys You know when Trump's talking shit His lips are moving a bit
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 12 Jan 2018, 10:31
by Helmut Shown
Our owner loves the sound of his voice. From he's posh mansion close to Theydon Bois But his teenage son Jack Tweets a load of old cack He should be told to go back to his toys You know when Trump's talking shit His lips are moving a bit
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 12 Jan 2018, 04:33
by jfk
Our owners a dwarf and a half jew. Produced rude things for me and for you. Made their sons oh so rich whilst paying a bitch. A good run of wins overdue. Out owner loves the sound of his voice. From he's posh mansion close to Theydon Bois
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 12 Jan 2018, 03:59
by arsene york-hunt
"One owner is an old duffer, The other a lying old bluffer, They've both made their choices And come in Rolls Royces We walk from Stratford, it's tougher. Our owners a dwarf and a half jew. Produced rude things for me and for you"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 12 Jan 2018, 01:03
by Hermit Road
"Our owners resemble the devil, With all of their talk of ""Next Level"". No wonder we’re glum, We’re taken for dumb, While in profits from us they do revel. One owner is an old duffer, The other a lying old bluffer,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 12 Jan 2018, 00:53
by Mike Oxsaw
"The window is open hooray But who are we buying today? No purchase or loan? Let's all have a moan And then we can go on our way. Our owners resemble the devil, With all of their talk of ""Next Level""."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 12 Jan 2018, 00:40
by Helmut Shown
There was a young man from Mauritius. Was eating a golden delicious But the apple I fear Caused a bout of diarrhoea It could hardly be called nutritious The window is open hooray But who are we buying today?
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 08 Jan 2018, 21:18
by arsene york-hunt
"A Fakir had three beers in Aswan Gave him powers through burqa's to scan, But the first in 'her' splendour Was a bloke who's transgender, And the next one was like a caveman. There was a young man from Mauritius. Was eating a golden delicious."