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New Limerick Thread

Posted: 30 Aug 2014, 19:44
by les marteaux
Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 11 Apr 2024, 12:34
by Helmut Shown
"Bombed the east end and thereabouts, Now we must play more fucking krauts Will we counter the German threat? Or give as good as we get With Moyesball I have my doubts It is said that the Duke of York Was looking for teenagers to pork"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 10 Apr 2024, 15:55
by arsene york-hunt
"An influencer writing his blog Did so while sat on the bog, Discussing hair dyes, And lining his eyes, While curling out a big log. Bombed the east end and thereabouts, Now we must play more fucking krauts"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 10 Apr 2024, 15:55
by arsene york-hunt
"An influencer writing his blog Did so while sat on the bog, Discussing hair dyes, And lining his eyes, While curling out a big log. Bombed the east end and thereabouts, Now we must play more fucking krauts"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 10 Apr 2024, 14:25
by Helmut Shown
**writing

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 10 Apr 2024, 14:25
by Helmut Shown
A pop star put on the nonce wing. For the other perverts would sing But a tone deaf old lag In need of a shag Bent him over and punctured his ring An influencer wrinting his blog Did so while sat on the bog

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 09 Apr 2024, 20:55
by arsene york-hunt
"There's Brooking, Payet & Devo And Tevez and Di Canio.. Then there's Arnautovic, And the great Keeble (Vic), But lots of stiffs too don't you know. A pop star put on the nonce wing. For the other perverts would sing."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 09 Apr 2024, 17:41
by Mike Oxsaw
"One thing that gets my Juices to flow Is the sight of a plump camel toe. But I'm not a big fan, Of one owned by a tran. If you see one then please let me know. There's Brooking, Payet & Devo And Tevez and Di Canio..."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 09 Apr 2024, 17:13
by Hello Mrs. Jones
"A tug on the vicar's bell rope, The best that a choirboy could hope But his aim was to boff All the ranks of the cloth Until he finally bends over the Pope One thing that gets my Juices to flow Is the sight of a plump camel toe"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 09 Apr 2024, 14:51
by Mike Oxsaw
"After sex she was feeling quite bitter As he'd done her up her Gary Glitter. without any lube. And a long metal tube Him thinking her screams were a titter. A tug on the vicar's bell rope, The best that a choirboy could hope"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 08 Apr 2024, 19:01
by arsene york-hunt
"After bringing her off with his fingers He ducked down and gave cunnilingus' Munching on her clit, He thought her quite fit, As they listened to some Charlie Mingus. After sex she was feeling quite bitter As he'd done her up her Gary Glitter"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 08 Apr 2024, 16:04
by Helmut Shown
A young rent boy called Horatio. Earned his crust doing felatio Shunned by society For outrageous impropriety After being exposed on the radio After bringing her off with his fingers He ducked down and gave cunnilingus

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 07 Apr 2024, 23:05
by arsene york-hunt
"I just saw a really fit piece In France on the Harbour in Nice, But it made me cringe When sniffing her minge, Was an unruly gaggle of geese. A young rent boy called Horatio. Earned his crust doing felatio"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 07 Apr 2024, 21:34
by Hello Mrs. Jones
I fancy this girl in my class Long legs and a real sexy arse But I'm sure she's a tranny With more cock than fanny You know. I think I'll just pass I just saw a really fit piece In France on the Harbour in Nice

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 07 Apr 2024, 17:01
by Mike Oxsaw
"No matter how hard that I look, I've never found Pete Townsend's book It's really not hard, Use the right credit card... ...at once, become pervert and crook. I fancy this girl in my class Long legs and a real sexy arse."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 05 Apr 2024, 22:40
by arsene york-hunt
"A singer, right well off his tits Decided he could do the splits. On the way down he slipped, His tendon's were ripped. And crushed the poor bloke's naughty bits. No matter how hard that I look, I've never found Pete Townsend's book"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 05 Apr 2024, 17:06
by Mike Oxsaw
"A young girl who came from Beijing. Every night in a bar she'd sing. For twenty-five Yuan She'd suck your old man. She was right into that sort of thing. A singer, right well off his tits Decided he could do the splits."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 05 Apr 2024, 13:36
by arsene york-hunt
"Her knickers fell down to the ground Revealing a big, hairy mound. It was not like a V, But shaped more like a T. Accessible for 40 pounds. A young girl who came from Beijing. Every night in a bar she'd sing. ."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 04 Apr 2024, 23:03
by Mike Oxsaw
"There was an old dog called Rover, Looking to get his leg over, He found a lamp post Would please him the most Like men in small boats seeing Dover Her knickers fell down to the ground Revealing a big, hairy mound."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 03 Apr 2024, 23:32
by arsene york-hunt
"A gnome by a pond sat there fishing At least let one bite, he was wishing, The silly old goat, Sat watching his float, Unaware that himself he was pishing. There was an old dog called Rover, Looking to get his leg over,"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 03 Apr 2024, 16:34
by Mike Oxsaw
"The was a young man called Bob Tried to give himself a blow job But, not double-jointed, Was left disappointed (So) like Bill & Ben, went ""Flob-a-lob"". A gnome by a pond sat there fishing At least let one bite, he was wishing"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 03 Apr 2024, 14:08
by Helmut Shown
"A lad of particular bent, Got dressed and then outside he went He wore tight shorts to school To accentuate his tool As it poked out in front like a tent The was a young man called Bob Tried to give himself a blow job"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 03 Apr 2024, 13:52
by Mike Oxsaw
"I look at my limericks sometimes, And I think what fucking shit rhymes But, easy it's not, Like blowing out snot Or sucking on lemons and limes. A lad of particular bent, Got dressed and then outside he went"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 02 Apr 2024, 16:09
by arsene york-hunt
"I wish the rich six would fuck off And take the refs with their snout in the trough, The top 5 teams corps Spurs too shown the door Now I'm off for some beef stroganoff. I look at my limericks sometimes, And I think what fucking shit rhymes* *see above"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 02 Apr 2024, 16:09
by arsene york-hunt
"I wish the rich six would fuck off And take the refs with their snout in the trough, The top 5 teams corps Spurs too shown the door Now I'm off for some beef stroganoff. I look at my limericks sometimes, And I think what fucking shit rhymes* *see above"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 02 Apr 2024, 13:40
by Helmut Shown
"I'm sick to the teeth of this VAR, The game it has started to mar. Watching Moyesball is tough And that's bad enough Bent refs and decisions bizarre I wish the rich six would fuck off And take the refs with their snout in the trough"