New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[HairyHammer]

There was a young girl called Fabia Had a very low hanging Labia No man would go near For It gave them such fear So she left on a boat to Arabia. A great dreamer from Azerbaijan Thought democracy a quite noble plan

[Helmut Shown]

"Another season draws to a close What to do over summer, who knows? Will our move up the road See our progress slowed? Or the West Ham way we impose? There was a young girl called Fabia Had very low hanging labia"

[Far East Hammer]

"Those Manure supporting scum, Didn't join up to be also run. They say it's not fair If they have a 'mare They'll cry all the way to their mum Another season draws to a close What to do over summer, who knows?"

[Saul Bollox]

"Everyone on here is delighted Once again fucking up Man United. With their heaven sent. Sense of entitlement The Dutch cunts exit's expedited. Those Manure supporting scum, Didn't join up to be also run."

[Helmut Shown]

"The doctor said ""Right! Drop your pants!"" ""And take up the requisite stance!"" With a hand on each shoulder The doctor got bolder An unprofessional circumstance Everyone on here is delighted Once again fucking up Man United"

[Saul Bollox]

"For a problem on his prostate he'd come The doctor stuck a finger up his bum He then stroked his cock, With a hand in a sock And carried on until he'd cum. There was an old man from Montrose Who blew all the snot from his nose."

[Mike Oxsaw]

"For a problem on his prostate he'd come The doctor stuck a finger up his bum The inserted digit Did cause him to fidget And then made his ring-piece all numb The doctor said ""Right! Drop your pants!"" ""And take up the requisite stance!"""

[Helmut Shown]

"I suddenly wanted a pee, Drips of urine were coming from me. Fuck this for a caper Soon be sat on newspaper Damp from bellybutton to knee For a problem on his prostate he'd come The doctor stuck a finger up his bum"

[Saul Bollox]

"One day, while out mowing the lawn, I suddenly started to yawn, I must be a berk To be doing such work I'm off back inside to watch porn. I suddenly wanted a pee, Drips of urine were coming form me."

[Mike Oxsaw]

"There was an old lady from Ryde Liked to.push foreign objects inside From peppermint rock To old badger's cock, Was nothing that she hadn't tried. One day, while out mowing the lawn, I suddenly started to yawn"

[Helmut Shown]

"An Austrian in a food market in China Was offered a chewy snack of cheesy vagina The packet front Said ""may contain cսnt But some may be arses! Beware diner!"" There was an old lady from Ryde Liked to.push foreign objects inside"

[HairyHammer]

"Some limericks on here are too clean So try to keep this thread Obscene If you don't want my fist Giving your Colon a twist Fucking swear, or get ready to scream. An Austrian in a food market in China Was offered a chewy snack of cheesy vagina"

[Saul Bollox]

"West Ham reigned supreme in the rain The Boleyn rocked for its last ever game, Playing football so pure Against fucking Manure, The Hammers will not be the same. Some limericks on here are too clean So try to keep the this tread obscene."

[HairyHammer]

"I picked up a girl I thought cute, She told me she was a prostitute She soon found out In my pockets I had nowt So she left me for a better pursuit. West Ham reigned supreme in the rain The Boleyn rocked for its last ever game"

[Saul Bollox]

"A significant chapter's closin' Time to say goodbye to the Boleyn I'd be thrilled to bits To beat those Manure shits, Bu now I am off to go bowling. I picked up a girl I thought cute, She told me she was a prostitute."

[Far East Hammer]

"There was a young man from Jaipur, Who made sculptures in horses manure But he didn't think Of the awful stink He didn't have many fans for sure A significant chapter's closin' Time to say goodbye to the Boleyn"

[Saul Bollox]

"Geordies or Mackems or both Let's hope its Fat Sam the oaf Goes down in the drop After which it's the chop, Amid effing and blinding and oaths There was a young man from Jaipur, Who made sculptures in horses manure"

[Helmut Shown]

"There once was a grumpy old git, Had a heart attack having a shit By the time help had come They had to wipe his bum With cotton wool they had in their kit Geordies or Mackems or both Let's hope its Fat Sam the oaf"

[Alfie]

"The tits of a badger Grown on a dog Bosom of a doctor Hurrying through the fog To attend a patient Tripped on a blatantly Left satsuma on the landing Fruit at night, vicious and maiming"

[Saul Bollox]

"When I took my car in for a service The mechanic was noticeably nervous, The stories were rife That he'd gone down in life He was Blue Peter's Peter Purves. There once was a grumpy old git, Had a heart attack having a shit"

[Saul Bollox]

"When I took my car in for a service The mechanic was noticeably nervous, The stories were rife Who had gone down in life He was Blue Peter's Peter Purves. There once was a grumpy old git, Had a heart attack having a shit"

[Saul Bollox]

"When I took my car in for a service The mechanic was noticeably nervous, The stories were rife Who had gone down in life He was Blue Peter's Peter Purves. There once was a grumpy old git, Had a heart attack having a shit"

[cosmo smallpiece]

"OK, here's something that I'll betcha Many Chelsea fans switched to Leicester Their allegiance had swung When the season was young And their title hopes started to fester When I took my car in for a service The mechanic was noticeably nervous"

[Far East Hammer]

"A young lad saw his mum astride His dad panting, he started to cry Seeing this is a crime Plus those lines do not rhyme This much he did soon confide OK, here's something that I'll betcha Many Chelsea fans switched to Leicester"

[HairyHammer]

"A young lad saw his mum astride His dad panting, he started to cry"