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New Limerick Thread
Posted: 30 Aug 2014, 19:44
by les marteaux
Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Feb 2016, 17:07
by HairyHammer
Saul Bollox 12.19 HEEE HAAWW.
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Feb 2016, 15:52
by Saul Bollox
"For Sunday, I like me roast dinner Beef, Yorkshires & spuds: what a winner! But it is not for me, My wife's German you see, And when asked says ""Ich bin ein Berliner!"" She stood there eating a Snickers A short dress and no Alan Wickers."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Feb 2016, 13:36
by Mike Oxsaw
"I bought 2 spare tickets for Stoke But the price that I paid was a joke They were in the wrong end So I had to pretend That I was a cսnt of a bloke. For Sunday, I like me roast dinner Beef, Yorkshires & spuds: what a winner!"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Feb 2016, 13:36
by Mike Oxsaw
"I bought 2 spare tickets for Stoke But the price that I paid was a joke They were in the wrong end So I had to pretend That I was a cսnt of a bloke. For Sunday, I like me roast dinner Beef, Yorkshires & spuds: what a winner!"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Feb 2016, 12:58
by cosmo smallpiece
"Now please chaps don't be such big tools, Just follow the Limerick rule It's quite simple you see You can't follow? Dear me I bet you were brilliant at school I bought 2 spare tickets for Stoke But the price that I paid was a joke"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Feb 2016, 12:19
by Saul Bollox
"How pathetic I am on a Limerick thread Being fussy about a Limerick, and showing the red, And your second line Also far from fine As fourteen syllables exceeds the amount required to give the correct rhythm, it has to be said. Now please chaps don't be such big tools, Just follow the Limerick rule"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Feb 2016, 09:10
by HairyHammer
"Fat Sam was never the Messiah Think he was? Then you're a tosser The second line Is a Limerick crime Doesn't rhyme with the first, so who's the tosser ?. How pathetic I am on a Limerick thread Being fussy about a Limerick, and showing the red,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Feb 2016, 04:59
by Far East Hammer
"Dimitri Payet's the Messiah, Who say's he's not's a fucking liar Not a naughty boy Brings us pride and joy Fills the team's belly with fire Fat Sam was never the Messiah Think he was? Then you're a tosser"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Feb 2016, 01:57
by Saul Bollox
"Boris Johnson and Trump we could see As two leaders of lands that are free, It would be an affront, Each one a fat cսnt, Neither would get a vote from me. Dimitri Payet's the Messiah, Who say's he's not's a fucking liar"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 23 Feb 2016, 20:14
by HairyHammer
"One day when the weather was damp I got dressed in the nudist camp A nudist I'm not For the penis iv'e got Would fit well on a postage stamp. Boris Johnson and Trump we could see As two leaders of lands that are free,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 23 Feb 2016, 13:52
by Saul Bollox
"A busker whilst roaming the tube Did pick up a strange looking cube It was a disgrace Porn pics on each face Of a gay man applying his lube. One day when the weather was damp, I got dressed in the nudist camp."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 23 Feb 2016, 12:26
by Mike Oxsaw
"A drunk Priest in his local high street Was trying without luck to send a Tweet, Sent a pic of his cock To the whole of his flock Howzat! True heavenly meat! A busker whilst roaming the tube Did pick up a strange looking cube"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 23 Feb 2016, 11:21
by HairyHammer
"There was an old maid from Sudbury Who still hadn't lost her cherry, So ugly fat and rough No Brit man would touch her muff 'Sod this' she thought, I'm off to France on a ferry. A drunk Priest in his local high street Was trying without luck to send a Tweet,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 23 Feb 2016, 04:07
by Far East Hammer
There was a man from Timbuctoo Used to squat on the seat in the loo. Until one day It did give way And he ended up losing a shoe There was an old maid from Sudbury Who still hadn't lost her cherry
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Feb 2016, 21:57
by Saul Bollox
"In a boarding house in Torbay They catered solely for the gay, The decor was all pink, And to remove the stink, Was air freshener of rose bouquet. There was a man from Timbuctoo Used to squat on the seat in the loo."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Feb 2016, 21:27
by Helmut Shown
A publican living in Devon thought that Newton Abbot was heaven By a fortunate twist His punters all pissed And this before half past seven In a boarding house in Torbay They catered solely for the gay
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Feb 2016, 20:42
by ,
There was a young girl from Nepal Once bit off her lover's left ball. it unsettled his gut to be minus one nut he did not like it at all A publican living in Devon thought that Newton Abbot was heaven
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Feb 2016, 20:36
by Saul Bollox
There was a backpacker called Ellie Got the shits while passing through Delhi Viiscosity like cum Squirted out of her bum And it's said that it was rather smelly. There was a young girl from Nepal Once bit off her lover's left ball.
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Feb 2016, 18:09
by Helmut Shown
"There was a young man called Rob, Paid a score to get a blow job. But his Indian whore Had curry before And it burnt the tip of his knob There was a backpacker called Ellie Got the shits while passing through Delhi"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Feb 2016, 16:56
by Saul Bollox
"A woman, not long off the blob, Was given a difficult job, She was give two large For full body massage. To the well known film star Lee J. Cobb. There was a young man called Rob, Paid a score to get a blow job."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Feb 2016, 16:22
by Mike Oxsaw
"A little boy walked in on his mother Who was screwing his fathers brother, I'd like to join in, He said with a grin We obviously know one another. A woman, not long off the blob, Was given a difficult job,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Feb 2016, 14:45
by HairyHammer
"There once was a chap called Bert Spent his time as an online pervert, Disgusting, fat and Obscene Always covering the laptop screen With his never ending, thick gooey squirt. A little boy walked in on his mother Who was screwing his fathers brother,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Feb 2016, 14:07
by Saul Bollox
"Oh Payet I'm so addicted to you A midfield Maestro in Claret and blue, A star I've been looking, For since Trevor Brooking, Lets hope those spurs cunts you will screw. There once was a chap called Bert. Spent his time as an online pervert."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 21 Feb 2016, 22:32
by HairyHammer
"With movement and skill quite sublime The ball hit the net for the fifth time, I jumped in the air Though not with much flair, Tore my trousers in two, what a crime. Oh Payet I'm so addicted to you A midfield Maestro in Claret and blue,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 21 Feb 2016, 22:32
by HairyHammer
"With movement and skill quite sublime The ball hit the net for the fifth time, I jumped in the air Though not with much flair, Tore my trousers in two, what a crime. Oh Payet I'm so addicted to you A midfield Maestro in Claret and blue,"