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New Limerick Thread
Posted: 30 Aug 2014, 19:44
by les marteaux
Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Feb 2016, 22:49
by Saul Bollox
"A man who was very tight Once threw a punch in a fight, Pointed out by some milf, And nicked by the filth, Ended up in a cell for the night. The hatred for spurs on this site, In my eyes it is only right."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Feb 2016, 22:15
by HairyHammer
"A girl flashed her tits and then said "" For twenty-five quid I give head"" I said ""not even for free"", ""I prefer slippers and tea"" , ""And my missus would shoot me dead"". A man who was very tight Once threw a punch in a fight,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Feb 2016, 20:35
by Mike Oxsaw
"A football team called Millwall Are famous for winning fuck all. Let's hope that this trend It never will end And back into the slime they will crawl A girl flashed her tits and then said ""For twenty-five quid I give head"""
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Feb 2016, 19:47
by Saul Bollox
"I'm a bit slow on this Limerick Thread Whilst others are faster Instead, Don't let spirits fall Happens to us all' Don't let it go to your head. A football team called Millwall Are famous for winning fuck all."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Feb 2016, 19:41
by Saul Bollox
Helmut Shown 5:01 Wed Feb 17 Great stuff - Well remembered.
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Feb 2016, 17:32
by HairyHammer
"I've just bought a box with Kodi To fuck over Murdoch, you see He has us all by the balls With his media haul A right wing midget, who id sling to the sea. I'm a bit slow on this Limerick Thread Whilst others are faster Instead,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Feb 2016, 17:09
by HairyHammer
"There once was a young bloke called danny Asked his bird "" Can I smell your fanny?"" Perturbed She obliged With a sniff he then died ""Not again ! "" she shrieked, "" How uncanny"". A fat cat started to sweat When he saw at the door stood his vet,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Feb 2016, 17:01
by Helmut Shown
"There once was a young bloke called Danny Asked his bird ""Can I smell your fanny?"" She said ""certainly not You ignorant twot"" ""Must be your feet then, uncanny!"" I've just bought a box with Kodi To fuck over Murdoch, you see"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Feb 2016, 13:20
by Saul Bollox
"He thought he'd pulled in Camber Sands Then he noticed the ""bird's"" big hands, Twas a tranny called Gilda Who worked as a builder, And complains no-one understands. There once was a young bloke called Danny Asked his bird ""Can I smell your fanny?"""
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Feb 2016, 08:57
by Far East Hammer
"I once had a date with a tart And thinking ""Now, how do I start?"" I felt a bit silly When I whipped out my willy But then let rip a great fart He thought he'd pulled in Camber Sands Then he noticed the ""bird's"" big hands"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Feb 2016, 07:29
by Mike Oxsaw
"My missus gets quite angry with me I leave the seat up after a pee. ""It's what all men do"" ""When using the loo"" ""'s genetic and breeding...prob'ly"". I once had a date with a tart And thinking ""Now, how do I start?"""
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 17 Feb 2016, 07:15
by Far East Hammer
It's a long way to Tipperary The girls there are ugly and hairy Thank your lucky stars You're far from their bars Which are all in all quite scary My missus gets quite angry with me I leave the seat up after a pee
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 16 Feb 2016, 21:40
by Saul Bollox
"An atheist who got very sick In his ass was bitten by a tic, And you know what's rum. When he scratches his bum He gets quite turned on, the gay prick. It's a long way to Tipperary The girls there are ugly and hairy"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 16 Feb 2016, 18:32
by HairyHammer
"If a millionaire gave a large sum Would you insert your cock in his bum No way Hosay I can honestly say I would rather be potless in a slum An atheist who got very sick In his ass was bitten by a tic,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 16 Feb 2016, 17:59
by joe blob
"How many of the T*tt*nh*m scabs Spend their day driving taxi cabs, Or practicing mohels, Without lotions or gels Infecting the babies with crabs. if a millionaire gave a large sum. Would you insert your cock in his bum?"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 16 Feb 2016, 17:42
by Helmut Shown
"A cat with a suspicious smile Loved watching some Jeremy Kyle, A toothless harridan Effing at her man Definitely a Millwall profile How many of the T*tt*nh*m scabs Spend their day driving taxi cabs"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 16 Feb 2016, 17:42
by Helmut Shown
"A cat with a suspicious smile Loved watching some Jeremy Kyle, A toothless harridan Effing at her man Definitely a Millwall profile How many of the T*tt*nh*m scabs Spend their day driving taxi cabs"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 16 Feb 2016, 15:24
by HairyHammer
"An alien from Jupiter Got done by a bloke up his shitter, Or so the bloke thought As his penis got caught, That Hole smirked the alien, is for chopping litter. A cat with a suspicious smile Loved watching some Jeremy Kyle,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 16 Feb 2016, 13:54
by Saul Bollox
"A visitor, just down from Mars Did a whistle-stop tour of some bars Got pissed as a newt Threw up on his space suit Ended up in the street on his arse. An alien from Jupiter Got done by a bloke up his shitter."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 16 Feb 2016, 13:21
by Mike Oxsaw
"There was a man from Venezuela, Tried to tie up his wife and impale 'er. But the rope was too short So it all came to naught And now his true love is his jailer. A visitor, just down from Mars Did a whistle-stop tour of some bars"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 16 Feb 2016, 12:45
by joe blob
"A man who divorced from his wife Felt fuzzy and warm in his life, And, so I have heard, Each week a new bird. And no more trouble and strife. There was a man from Venezuela, Tried to tie up his wife and impale 'er."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 16 Feb 2016, 10:22
by HairyHammer
"I'm trying to write a new song But all of it's coming out wrong, I'm no Leonard Cohen And my voice keeps on going, So ill bang on a drum with my schlong. A man who divorced from his wife Felt fuzzy and warm in his life,"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 16 Feb 2016, 07:27
by Far East Hammer
"A West ham fan from Peru To his wife he could never be true, Caught with her sister And that girl's mister He ended up beaten black and blue And ex of mine liked it kinky Preferred my knob up her stinky"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 16 Feb 2016, 07:25
by Mike Oxsaw
"A West ham fan from Peru To his wife he could never be true, The thought of more cսnt Set him on the hunt To dip his manhood in more girl goo. I'm trying to write a new song But all of it's coming out wrong"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 16 Feb 2016, 06:17
by HairyHammer
"There was a young man from Butte, Saved up to shag a young prostitute He sold his flabby body Till his ass became shoddy, But all he could afford was some fruit. A West ham fan from Peru To his wife he could never be true,"