New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[arsene york-hunt]

"A poofy young man from Stranraer Would pick up sailors in a bar. Firstly, they of course, Had social intercourse, Then bumming in the back of a car. There was a young girl from Cheshunt, Who publicly would flash her cսnt"

[Helmut Shown]

So Brexit has not gone away. The losers must still have their say. We need compensation For midsold information To allow that poor Boris his sway A poofy young man from Stranraer Would pick up sailors in a bar

[Helmut Shown]

"Taking out cocks in a public place, First lines Lim'ricists often face On nearly all fronts Girls won’t flash their cunts Yet for blokes it’s quite commonplace A poofy young boy from Stranraer Would pick up sailors in a bar"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"Taking out cocks in a public place, First lines Lim'ricists often face ""You're not wiping that on"" ""Me or my loved one"" ""Now piss of, you fucking disgrace. So Brexit has not gone away. The losers must still have their say."

[arsene york-hunt]

"There was an old whore from Calcutta Lubed up her anus with butter, To be at her best For her favourite guest, Her old teacher Mr. Dutta. Taking out cocks in a public place, First lines Lim'ricists often face"

[arsene york-hunt]

"There was an old whore from Calcutta Lubed up her anus with butter, To be at her best For her favourite guest, Her old teacher Mr. Dutta. Taking out cocks in a public place, First lines Lim'ricists often face"

[Helmut Shown]

I fucked an old whore on the rag And got blood all over my bag The stuff from her gash Has given me a rash And I only wanted a shag There was an old whore from Calcutta Lubed up her anus with butter

[Helmut Shown]

I fucked an old whore on the rag And got blood all over my bag The stuff from her gash Has given me a rash And I only wanted a shag There was an old whore from Calcutta Lubed up her anus with butter

[Hello Mrs. Jones]

"i'm sure I saw Vladimir Putin, When he left a brothel in Tooting What he did to Ukraine Is evidently plain That the despicable cսnt wants shooting I fucked an old whore on the rag And got blood all over my bag"

[arsene york-hunt]

"A girl from Bromley-by-Bow Would offer all and sundry a blow With a cup of tea too, It was quite good value, At only a fiver a go. i'm sure I saw Vladimir Putin, When he left a brothel in Tooting."

[Hello Mrs. Jones]

"After a good night out on the lash On the way home he needed a slash As he peed on a wall He heard ""Evening all"" His decision was really quite rash A girl from Bromley-by-Bow Would offer all and sundry a blow"

[Helmut Shown]

"Up next we're playing some Krauts, From near Strasbourg or thereabouts Our performance was poor When we beat them before Why do I still have doubts? After a good night out on the lash On the way home he needed a slash"

[Helmut Shown]

"Up next we're playing some Krauts, From near Strasbourg or thereabouts Our performance was poor When we beat them before Why do I still have doubts? After a good night out on the lash On the way home he needed a slash"

[arsene york-hunt]

"First stop was a few at the Boleyn Then onto the ground for a win, Or a loss or a draw, Against teams that are poor, These fuckers get under your skin. Up next we're playing some Krauts, From near Strasbourg or thereabouts"

[arsene york-hunt]

"First stop was a few at the Boleyn Then onto the ground for a win, Or a loss or a draw, Against teams that are poor, These fuckers get under your skin. Up next we're playing some Krauts, From near Strasbourg or thereabouts"

[Hello Mrs. Jones]

There was an old man from Bolsover Who dreamed bending young ladies over He'd line them all up Primed ready to schtup It looked like the white cliffs of Dover First stop was a few at the Boleyn Then onto the ground for a win

[Helmut Shown]

The young bird living next door Would suck on my balls until raw I applied soothing unction To improve sexual function Now I'll give her what for There was an old man from Bolsover Who dreamed bending young ladies over

[Hello Mrs. Jones]

"There was a young girl from Whitstable, Who shat on her mum's coffee table This may appeal to those Scat freaks and weirdos And those that are mentally unstable The young bird living next door Would suck on my balls until raw"

[arsene york-hunt]

"I thought that my girlfriend, perhaps, Would let me play with her piss-flaps. I really don't know, Why she always says no, As she's let lots of other chaps. There was a young girl from Whitstable, Who shat on her mum's coffee table"

[arsene york-hunt]

"I thought that my girlfriend, perhaps, Would let me play with her piss-flaps. I really don't know, Why she always says no, As she's let lots of other chaps. There was a young girl from Whitstable, Who shat on her mum's coffee table"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"I looked on a porn site today, Two dykes were having it away, And what made them come Was fingers in bum Well, that's what the subtitles say. I thought that my girlfriend, perhaps, Would let me play with her piss-flaps."

[arsene york-hunt]

"The venerable Marquis of Beaulieu Was born with only one goolie, But when he was young, A song that he sung Was: Hang Down your Head Tom Dooley. I looked on a porn site today, Two dykes were having it away,"

[Hello Mrs. Jones]

I think that the last verse was rough The rhyming consid'rbly tough I hear your dissention But it weren't my intention They usually just come off the cuff The venerable Marquis of Beaulieu Was born with only one goolie

[Mike Oxsaw]

"I wonder to my myself sometimes Why only a few post these rhymes. Perhaps it's the verse Both short and quite terse Yet humorous, like cartoon clock chimes. I think that the last verse was rough The rhyming consid'rbly tough"

[Hello Mrs. Jones]

"An athlete, a long distance runner, It was said, he was a rear gunner But by rear gunner I mean He was an effeminate queen Known as the Back-door Plumber I wonder to my myself sometimes Why only a few post these rhymes"