Page 322 of 361
New Limerick Thread
Posted: 30 Aug 2014, 19:44
by les marteaux
Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 30 Jan 2015, 17:32
by Joke Whole
"While In the waiting room of my vet's A young bloke seemed to have Tourette's, The words from his gob Played hell with my knob: We went on to rape all the pets. The packet my iPhone came in Has filled up my recycle bin"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 29 Jan 2015, 22:16
by Helmut Shown
"A guts ache was giving me pain, The it splattered the bog porcelain But it would appear that the water is clear But the rest is a fucking big stain On the way to my old workplace On the billboards was Cameron's face"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 29 Jan 2015, 22:11
by Helmut Shown
"A guts ache was giving me pain, The it splattered the bog porcelain But it would appear that the water is clear But the rest is a fucking big stain On the way to my old workplace On the billboards was Cameron's face"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 29 Jan 2015, 22:11
by Helmut Shown
"A guts ache was giving me pain, The it splattered the bog porcelain But it would appear that the water is clear But the rest is a fucking big stain On the way to my old workplace On the billboards was Cameron's face"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 29 Jan 2015, 21:53
by Saul Bollox
"A man sat watching TV Would not get up for a wee He moved just a bit When he wanted a shit, But it all gushed onto the setee. A guts ache was giving me pain, The it splattered the bog porcelaine"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 29 Jan 2015, 21:06
by Helmut Shown
While In the waiting room of my vet's A young bloke seemed to have Tourette's the receptionist took the brunt As he called her a cսnt And frightened all the other pets A man sat watching TV Would not get up for a wee
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 29 Jan 2015, 18:47
by Saul Bollox
Some posters on here are euphoric Quoting their Daily Mail rhetoric These right wing loonies Are so easy to please But may as well be speaking Doric. While In the waiting room of my vet's A young bloke seemed to have Tourette's
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 29 Jan 2015, 18:16
by Helmut Shown
I once had a neighbour called Bert He'd brown stains on the tail of his shirt When he got off the loo Diamond patterns in poo With his string vest straining the dirt Some posters on here are euphoric Quoting their Daily Mail rhetoric
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 28 Jan 2015, 19:14
by Saul Bollox
"A man claimed that once in a week At porn he would timidly peek But his wife caught him out, and gave him a clout, Now he just watches Jonathan Creek. I once had a neighbour called Bert He'd brown stains on the tail of his shirt"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 28 Jan 2015, 18:10
by Joke Whole
An Indian girl from Darjeeling Used a butt plug to increase the feeling But having some doubt She whipped the thing out And the shit-storm reached up to the ceiling. A man claimed that once in a week At porn he would timidly peek
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 28 Jan 2015, 13:11
by Helmut Shown
There was a young girl from Hanoi Taking it from behind gave her joy Until one young man With a devious plan Stuck it in her bum to annoy An Indian girl from Darjeeling Used a butt plug to increase the feeling
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 26 Jan 2015, 16:02
by Saul Bollox
The cup games this weekend were great... So far - but what of OUR fate? We'll win one -zero Our scorer? Sakho Easy to get right when too late. There was a young girl from Hanoi Taking it from behind gave her joy.
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 25 Jan 2015, 17:26
by Joke Whole
WHO posters in Thailand seek joy. Where they hook up with a ladyboy. Piss flaps AND a cock Will come as a shock But not if you know well the Soi The cup games this weekend were great... So far - but what of OUR fate?
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 25 Jan 2015, 15:11
by Saul Bollox
"Sorry fucked that right up There was a young girl Isabel Confused superglue with KY gel, Which she did lend, To a shirtlifter friend. Now's stuck to his bumboy's end belll. WHO posters in Thailand seek joy. Where they hook up with a ladyboy."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 25 Jan 2015, 14:55
by Saul Bollox
"There was a young girl Isabel Confused superglue with KY gel, Which she did lend, To a shirtlifter friend. Now he's stuck too his bumboy's rear end. WHO posters in Thailand seek joy. Where they hook up with a ladyboy."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Jan 2015, 19:37
by Helmut Shown
"A tramp crouching down for a crap, Had an unfortunate mishap As the turd left his arse Heading for the green grass It hit his pants with a slap There was a young girl Isabel Confused superglue with KY gel"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Jan 2015, 14:39
by Saul Bollox
"The sun, now it's risen on high Does mean that it's my time to fly Getting up has no charm So switch off the alarm And try to get some more shut-eye. A tramp crouching down for a crap, Had an unfortunate mishap"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Jan 2015, 05:07
by Joke Whole
"A peculiar man from Vermont Would only use sans serif font My letters, he'd wail Have no need of a tail Some squiggles are not what I want The sun, now it's risen on high Does mean that it's my time to fly"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Jan 2015, 03:43
by Monk~koknee
"There was a young lady called Kim Had little spots over her quim Her pure boyfriend Pat Said ""I'm not having that"" So he scoured it clean using Vim A peculiar man from Vermont Would only use sans serif font"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 24 Jan 2015, 00:44
by Helmut Shown
"There was a boy from Arkansas, Who would not listen to his Maw ""wear a condom when you have sex Or you'll end up with pus down your kecks"" Good advice, that's what mums are for There was a young lady called Kim Had little spots over her quim"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Jan 2015, 21:52
by Saul Bollox
"Whilst shagging my woman last night She gave me a terrible fright, Whilst pounding her chasm, Into blissful orgasm, She screamed the name of Mr White. There was a boy from Arkansas, Who would not listen to his Maw"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Jan 2015, 21:52
by Saul Bollox
"Whilst shagging my woman last night She gave me a terrible fright, Whilst pounding her chasm, Into blissful orgasm, She screamed the name of Mr White. There was a boy from Arkansas, Who would not listen to his Maw"
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 22 Jan 2015, 16:29
by Joke Whole
A bloke living on benefits Had a very bad dose of the shits. His very last squirt Was the one that most hurt Because it was packed full of bits. Whilst shagging my woman last night She gave me a terrible fright
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 21 Jan 2015, 23:26
by Saul Bollox
"In the changing rooms down at the gym A young girl sat stroking her quim An old janitor, Then walked in the door So she opened her lips just for him. A bloke living on benefits Had a very bad dose of the shits."
Re: New Limerick Thread
Posted: 21 Jan 2015, 23:26
by Saul Bollox
"In the changing rooms down at the gym A young girl sat stroking her quim An old janitor, Then walked in the door So she opened her lips just for him. A bloke living on benefits Had a very bad dose of the shits."