Page 344 of 361

New Limerick Thread

Posted: 30 Aug 2014, 19:44
by les marteaux
Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 24 Nov 2014, 23:27
by les marteaux
"Try again A man ate Pedigree Chum It had a bad effect on his bum. He was going insane, Cause his fucking Great Dane Kept licking his arse 'til he cum. A ladyboy from near Bankok, Said from westham online they all flock"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 24 Nov 2014, 23:24
by les marteaux
"A man ate Pedigree Chum It had a bad effect on his bum. He was going insane, Cause he fucking Great Dane Kept licking his arse until he cum"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 24 Nov 2014, 23:23
by Helmut Shown
"Shit! I picked up a Doris last night, To be honest, a bit of a sight. Behind closed doors As he pulled down her drawers Her botty was covered in shite A man ate Pedigree Chum It had a bad effect on his bum"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 24 Nov 2014, 23:20
by Helmut Shown
There once was a crack-whore from Belize Whose tits hung down to her knees For some petty cash She'd show you her gash But for oral and anal big fees A man ate Pedigree Chum It had a bad effect on his bum

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 24 Nov 2014, 23:18
by les marteaux
"There once was a crack-whore from Belize Whose tits hung down to her knees To great depths she had sunk, And her vagina stunk, 'Twas a magnet for spiders and fleas. I picked up a Doris last night, To be honest, a bit of a sight."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 24 Nov 2014, 21:35
by easthambull
"There once was a Hammer from Bucks, Of life he thought, ""This really sucks"", The wife's shit in bed my Pit-bull is dead So now I just don't give two fucks There once was a crack-whore from Belize Whose tits hung down to her knees"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 24 Nov 2014, 18:57
by Joke Whole
"There once was a man from Montrose, Picked a massive bogey from his nose. It weighed half a ton And blocked out the sun, But where it went, nobody knows. There once was a Hammer from Bucks, Of life he thought, ""This really sucks"","

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 23 Nov 2014, 23:41
by les marteaux
"A woman who once lived in France, Took lessons to learn how to dance, But Craig Reville-Hall, Said ""She's good for fuck all, Her chasis she needs to enhance"". There once was a man from Montrose, Picked a massive bogey from his nose."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 23 Nov 2014, 21:10
by Tippys Cafe
"A man from the Isles of Porta Vista, Got a blow up doll and then kissed 'er The packet said 'Keegan' 'Michelle?' He kept thinkin' Instead he got Kevin with blisters A woman who once lived in France, Took lessons to learn how to dance,"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 23 Nov 2014, 20:48
by les marteaux
"There was an old man from Corfu Who shat pebbles instead of poo poo Put in shapes quite obscene He then painted them green. And sold one to my Aunty Pru. An man from the Isles of Porta Vista, Got a blow up doll and then kissed 'er"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 23 Nov 2014, 19:18
by Lily Hammer
"That cսnt BFS fucked-up again ""Injuries"" was his cunty refrain But enough of that Back to the twat with the furry pubic main There was an old man from Corfu Who shat pebbles instead of poo poo"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 23 Nov 2014, 19:07
by easthambull
"The sight of a girl's hairy minge Is said to make some posters cringe So am I alone of being quite prone To to a split-arse sporting a fringe? That cսnt BFS fucked-up again ""Injuries"" was his cunty refrain"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 23 Nov 2014, 12:47
by Joke Whole
"A old man who comes from near Diss, Liked ladies drawers smelling of piss On sniffing urine The old git would pine Of the one time he went with a ""miss"" The sight of a girl's hairy minge Is said to make some posters cringe"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 22 Nov 2014, 15:38
by Saul Bollox
"A Scotsman from old Aberdeen Was said to be very mean All of his cash, Up his kilt he would stash, Where I would not say was too clean. A old man who comes from near Diss, Liked ladies drawers smelling of piss"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 22 Nov 2014, 09:54
by Helmut Shown
"In bed with Lucy Verasamy, Then awoke and thought I'm going barmy I was tied to the bed She was sat on my head It tasted a bit like pastrami A Scotsman from old Aberdeen Was said to be very mean"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 22 Nov 2014, 05:30
by Saul Bollox
"Why does most ITV tosh Always involve Joe Swash A nonentity Like most that we see And of which all channels are awash. In bed with Lucy Verasamy, Then awoke and thought I'm going barmy"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 22 Nov 2014, 00:47
by Helmut Shown
"To a cinema in Carolina, A pervert had taken a minor For the price of some sweets He got all his treats Whilst watching a film by Rob Reiner Why does most ITV tosh Always involve Joe Swash"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 21 Nov 2014, 23:06
by les marteaux
"There was an old girl from Iran Was promiscuous for a gran But the Islamic court Had a quite diff'rent thought, Now she doesn't need her pension plan. To a cinema in Carolna, A pervert had taken a minor."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 21 Nov 2014, 22:49
by Helmut Shown
A young lady from Northern Algiers Had piss flaps like elephants ears When she went for a slash The spray from her gash Made quite a pattern it appears There was an old girl from Iran Was promiscuous for a gran

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 21 Nov 2014, 22:42
by Helmut Shown
(nt)

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 21 Nov 2014, 22:42
by Helmut Shown
(nt)

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 21 Nov 2014, 19:50
by tiddingtoniron
"There was a young man from Daytona, Had a bad itch on his glans corona. Each time it swelled The poor bugger yelled And scratched his embarrassing boner A young lady from Northern Algiers Had piss flaps like elephants ears"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 21 Nov 2014, 17:27
by Saul Bollox
"So Downing has got himself crocked Playing for England, what a great shock So this leads the way, For Nolan to play, Are we again the laughing stock? There was a young man from Daytona, Had a bad itch on his glans corona."

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 21 Nov 2014, 08:57
by easthambull
"Someone thought ""Yoo-Kay I Pee"" ""Is it the party for me?"" For this shit-cunt scrote It's a protest vote When the election comes around, I'll see. So Downing has got himself crocked Playing for England, what a great shock"

Re: New Limerick Thread

Posted: 21 Nov 2014, 02:47
by Far East Hammer
"Everyone from Liverpool's a prick, A neutron bomb may do the trick But they'd nick the timer And flog off the primer Leaving it without a big kick Someone thought ""Yoo-Kay I Pee"" ""Is it the party for me?"""