New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[HairySpotter]

There once was a fellow called Kevin whose presence did everyone's head in listening to stories about his bird was tough especially about her huge muff big he said? i fucking nearly fell in There once was a bloke playing blackjack who asked for the dealer to cut him some slack

[Hammer and Pickle]

On a dogging site deep in the wood sat a cab driver up to no good He was looking for a pro called Mark but had no knowledge of the park So had to make do with stroking his hood. There once was a fellow called Kevin whose presence did everyone's head in

[Mr Polite]

"An RC priest told a young lad, To drop his pants as he'd been bad Where should they go asked the boy - not to know 'over there, next to mine on the Rad' On a dogging site deep in the wood sat a cab driver up to no good"

[Saul Bollox]

"The chapel in Hampton-on-Wick Has clergy who make the world sick. But try as I might, I just cannot write, A last line not ending with prick. An RC priest told a young lad, To drop his pants as he'd been bad"

[Saul Bollox]

"The chapel in Hampton-on-Wick Has clergy who make the world sick. But try as I might, I just cannot write, A last line not ending with prick. An RC priest told a young lad, To drop his pants as he'd been bad"

[Joke Whole]

"Things now are looking quite bad, For the superstar, real name Paul Gadd. A spell in the clink Should make the cսnt think Of all the young girls he has had. The chapel in Hampton-on-Wick Has clergy who make the world sick"

[Saul Bollox]

"You haven't quite got the grasp of this yet, side effect."

[side effect]

There was a young man who was old Who when he was bought he was sold

[Saul Bollox]

"On the internet looking things up I clicked on 'Two girls one cup'.. The girls from Brazil They make you feel ill, What next? A bloke shagging a pup. Things now are looking quite bad, For the superstar, real name Paul Gadd."

[Mr Polite]

That Silvio Berlusconi Deserves an Oscar or Tony For Using his Wonga To enjoy Bunga Bunga He makes our politicians look phoney On the internet looking things up I clicked on 'Two girls one cup'..

[easthambull]

Young Adolf when he was just a boy Had a life full of wonder and joy. I don't think he did His boss was a yid Unhappy was he in their employ That Silvio Berlusconi Deserves an Oscar or Tony

[Mr Polite]

The keyboard warriors of WHO Need to find something else to do Perhaps catch someone sleazy By being Julia Wright-Trapesi? Who was sleazy? depends on your view. Young Adolf when he was just a boy Had a life full of wonder and joy..

[,]

The keyboard warriors of WHO Need to find something else to do there's one tries and tries to prove Gold's telling lies and another who's really a Blue Will Moyes be up to the task now that he's a surrogate Basque?

[easthambull]

One Saturday Night all alone Just twiddling my thumbs sat at home As time past me by I unzipped my fly . and coiffured my pubes with a comb The keyboard warriors of WHO Need to find something else to do

[Mr Polite]

One Limerick poster to date has put up his missive too late He's names Two Tonne Ted Or So Ernie said That Baker from Tiddington's great! One Saturday Night all alone Just twiddling my thumbs sat at home...

[,]

"In a brothel in downtown Hanoi, There's a choice of girls or ladyboy they're willing to please these Vietnamese give them money and they'll give you joy One Limerick poster to date has put up his missive too late"

[Saul Bollox]

tiddingtoniron 6:33 Tue Nov 11 About a day late with that one old chap

[Saul Bollox]

"There once was a lady of the night who gave me a terrible fright She looked like most whores But removing her drawers, Took out a great cock, what a sight. In a brothel in downtown Hanoi, There's a choice of girls or ladyboy"

[tiddingtoniron]

"A man looked upon his fresh shits, Which contained all sorts of strange bits. His wife, quite the perv, With vigour and verve, Smeared it all over her tits With the euros banked from Bale, The lillywhites could surely not fail........"

[HairySpotter]

There was a young man called Miles Was a martyr to a case of the piles they made him walk funny took pills to make his poo runny and ruined his night on the tiles There once was a lady of the night who gave me a terrible fright

[Helmut Shown]

There was a young lady from China Who visited North Carolina For the rednecks to prove The orientation of her groove Was just like a normal vagina There was a young man called Miles Was a martyr to a case of the piles

[Lily Hammer]

"There was a young man from Crewe Did perversion with young girls poo, Throwing turds in the air That land in his hair At which point he starts to shampoo There was a young lady from China Who visited North Carolina"

[Lily Hammer]

Dave was wanking in the bath whilst also strangling with his scarf His face turned blue His helmet did too And he thought that was good for a laugh. There was a young lady from China Who visited North Carolina

[Saul Bollox]

"Dave was wanking in the bath whilst also strangling with his scarf He was dead in a jiffy With a rigor mortised stiffy Which made the paramedic laugh.. There was a young man from Crewe Did perversion with young girls poo,"

[HairySpotter]

One day when eating fish fingers I had the urge for cunnilingus. So i went hunting a looker but settled for a hooker she did it wrong and the pain still lingers Dave was wanking in the bath whilst also strangling with his scarf