New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[,]

"Now Mandy Rice-Davis is dead, To whom shall I turn to for head? perhaps I'll employ a real lady boy like some bloke on this Board does instead."

[,]

"Now Mandy Rice-Davis is dead, To whom shall I turn to for head? perhaps I'll employ a real lady boy like some bloke on this Board does instead."

[Joke Whole]

"A great pleasure in my recollection, Is when I could could get an erection My helmet whould shine, And the girls, they would whine, As I fucked them in every direction. Now Mandy Rice-Davis is dead, To whom shall I turn to for head?"

[Saul Bollox]

"I'm not as young as I used to be These days I can hardly even see, But the problem I hate ..is my fucking prostate, It makes me have to sit to pee. A great pleasure in my recollection, Is when I could could get an erection"

[Far East Hammer]

All the boys from the old ICF They're now bald and wrinkled and deaf Now when meeting a mate They discuss their prostate And stupid calls by the ref I'm not as young as I used to be These days I can hardly even see

[Hello Mrs. Jones]

"A fairground based pikey once said ""These dodgems quite do in my head"". And when on the dipper I'm done like a kipper I think I'd be better off dead All the boys from the old ICF They're now bald and wrinkled and deaf"

[Joke Whole]

"A Brummie bird instead of custard Smothered her crumble in hot mustard. She had to save face, So she ate it with grace, E'en though the girl ended up flustered. A fairground based pikey once said ""These dodgems quite do in my head""."

[Far East Hammer]

"I woke up and in just a jiffy, I noticed I had a big stiffy. And my bum was sore Michael Barrymore And this corpse looked quite iffy A Brummie bird instead of custard Smothered her crumble in hot mustard"

[Saul Bollox]

"Not really wanting to pester But I need 2 tickets for Leicester I'm so desperate to go And if lucky I'll show, ..up in a bright green sou'wester. I woke up and in just a jiffy, I noticed I had a big stiffy."

[Hello Mrs. Jones]

"A waiter from The Star of Bengal, Got involved in a nasty pub brawl. They glassed Mr. Singh But here is the thing Did they leave him a tip? No fuck all No really wanting to pester But I need 2 tickets for Leicester"

[inconsistant fc]

"A tall lanky brass from the East, Had a snatch that was riddled with yeast. But boy, she could ski, 'Cos between you and me, She was top notch when on the piste. A waiter from The Star of Bengal, Got involved in a nasty pub brawl."

[Hello Mrs. Jones]

I met a girl from Guadeloupe. Who was mustard on the hula hoop As it swung round her middle It made her go piddle And sometimes it made her go poop A tell lanky brass from the East Had a snatch that was riddled with yeast

[Saul Bollox]

*hoop

[Saul Bollox]

I've always wanted to go to Djibouti They say the woman are fruity But no labia nor clit Which makes for a tight fit. All removed as an islamic duty. I met a girl from Guadeloupe. Who was mustard on the hula hool

[Saul Bollox]

Joke Whole 6:49 Thu Dec 18 Joke Whole 5:18 Thu Dec 18 Hahahahaha!

[Nuclear Noodle]

"I look at the sky and I wonder Will I end up there, or go under? Whether heaven or hell Makes no sense to dwell So i'll drink 10 pints and just chunder I've always wanted to go to Djibouti They say the woman are fruity"

[Joke Whole]

"There once was a man from Tashkent Who looked for a boy he could rent. He buggered him hard. With the help of some lard. And considered it money well spent. I look at the sky and I wonder Will I end up there, or go under?"

[Saul Bollox]

"Tis one week until Xmas day Wearing Xmas jumpers that make you look gay, I'm told that this year Looking just like a queer, Fits in Well at the Bridge Boxing Day. There once was a man from Tashkent Who looked for a boy he could rent"

[Nuclear Noodle]

In the WHO poll there must be a jester 'cos he thinks we'll be beaten by Leicester But come what may I am sorry to say No goals and we'll start a mid winter fester Tis one week until Xmas day Wearing Xmas jumpers that make you look gay

[,]

stable lad.

[,]

"I was once told by Frankie Dettori, That he liked to watch films that are gory. viewed of course from atop a horse sat behind the stale lad Rory. In the WHO poll there must be a jester 'cos he thinks we'll be beaten by Leicester"

[Saul Bollox]

"I once bumped into Lester Piggot Paid no tax, but he was no bigot When in his prison cell They buggered him well. Then stopped up his arse with a spigot. I was once told by Frankie Dettori, That he liked to watch films that are gory."

[Saul Bollox]

"I once bumped into Lester Piggot Paid no tax, but he was no bigot When in his prison cell They buggered him well. Then stopped up his arse with a spigot. I was once told by Frankie Dettori, That he liked to watch films that are gory."

[Bouncing Ludo]

"The world, it has gone round the bend As religion based nutters ascend to a glorious ending with virgins attending Now I wonder how it can all end I once bumped into Lester Piggot Paid no tax, but he was no bigot"

[Joke Whole]

"A stunner from the Cote D'Ivoire Serviced blokes in the back of a car. For some chicken 'n' rice She'd do the act twice Then take the food home to her pa. The world, it has gone round the bend As religion based nutters ascend"