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New Limerick Thread

West Ham Online's Football Forum
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les marteaux
Posts: 148

New Limerick Thread

Post les marteaux »

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront
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Mike Oxsaw
Posts: 4477
Location: Flip between Belvedere & Buri Ram and anywhere else I fancy, just because I can.
Old WHO Number: 14021
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Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Mike Oxsaw »

"A Muslim on a North London street Knelt and bowed at a racist man's feet, ""Oh! Imam explain"" ""How I can best claim"" ""Those benefits week after week"" The mosque has closed down for the day I've nowhere to go now to pray"
HairyHammer
Posts: 217

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post HairyHammer »

"A young lad who ain't a Jamaican Was speaking in fluent Jafaikan As white as a sheet Extensions touching his feet, But his curried chicken could not be mistaken. A Muslim on a North London street Knelt and bowed at a racist man's feet,"
Saul Bollox
Posts: 1271

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Saul Bollox »

"Some bimbo has moved in down the road I think she is talking in code ""Like"" 4 times each sentence, Very little makes sense, With brains she has not been bestowed. A young lad who aint a Jamaican Was speaking in fluent Jafaikan"
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Mike Oxsaw
Posts: 4477
Location: Flip between Belvedere & Buri Ram and anywhere else I fancy, just because I can.
Old WHO Number: 14021
Has liked: 29 times
Been liked: 517 times

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Mike Oxsaw »

"A researcher asked a question quite vile, Who's your favourite celeb paedophile, If it HAS to be said. I think someone dead, Or who hasn't been seen for a while. Some bimbo has moved in down the road I think she is talking in code"
Saul Bollox
Posts: 1271

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Saul Bollox »

"All these celeb deaths leave me vexed Why can't Katie Hopkins be next? To keep up with this crap I've bought a new app. When the next one dies I'll get a text.. A researcher asked a question quite vile, Who's your favourite celeb paedaophile,"
Far East Hammer
Posts: 388
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Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Far East Hammer »

John Terry says he won't retire But who will buy a pariah? A publicity stunt For some right dodgy cսnt Though it would likely backfire All these celeb deaths leave me vexed Why can't Katie Hopkins be next?
Helmut Shown
Posts: 1307
Old WHO Number: 213307
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Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Helmut Shown »

"A man threw a plate at a mouse, It missed and hit his poor spouse, Sporting a black eye She pushed his face in a pie And then kicked him out of the house John Terry says he won't retire But who will buy a pariah?"
HairyHammer
Posts: 217

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post HairyHammer »

"A fat girl, a very good swimmer, Tried without success to get slimmer. Food made her so happy Though sex was more snappy So she combined them, and became a fat sinner. A man threw a plate at a mouse, It missed and hit his poor spouse,"
Saul Bollox
Posts: 1271

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Saul Bollox »

"A little man from Blackburn Could cover his face with a gurn, And then he'd get rough, While licking out muff, To complaints that his stubble did burn. A fat girl, a very good swimmer, Tried without success to get slimmer"
HairyHammer
Posts: 217

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post HairyHammer »

"There was a young man called Dave, Who found a dead whore in a cave, His Erection was strong But her fanny what a pong So he washed it, and gave her a Shave. A little man from Blackburn Could cover his face with a gurn,"
Saul Bollox
Posts: 1271

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Saul Bollox »

"A dove from Arizona Flew to London to taste some Corona, She flew into a park To pick up a lark. But was raped by a crow with a boner. Some of the above may contain biological inaccuracies. There was a young man called Dave. Who found a dead whore in a cave,"
HairyHammer
Posts: 217

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post HairyHammer »

Sorry Saul my eyes are obviously Shite.
HairyHammer
Posts: 217

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post HairyHammer »

"There was a young boy from Leeds stayed in bed all day smoking his weeds. Lazy and paranoid His brain such a void That his parents wished he were on speed. A dove from Arizona Flew to London to taste some Corona,"
HairyHammer
Posts: 217

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post HairyHammer »

"A young girl did rent out her gash To gentlemen paying in cash Gash was her toy bear Most gentlemen would despair Though confused, teddy's back door they still smashed. Some Americans are so awfully Southern Where time stands still, and nothing is Modern"
Saul Bollox
Posts: 1271

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Saul Bollox »

"A young girl did rent out her gash To gentlemen paying in cash, To further her cause, She worked without pause, Excepting to have a quick slash. There was a young boy from Leeds Stayed in bed all day smoking his weeds."
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Mike Oxsaw
Posts: 4477
Location: Flip between Belvedere & Buri Ram and anywhere else I fancy, just because I can.
Old WHO Number: 14021
Has liked: 29 times
Been liked: 517 times

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Mike Oxsaw »

"A Tottenham supporter called Solly. Pushed a stolen supermarket trolley. Down to the scrap yard And, though he tried hard, He couldn't exchange it for lolly. A young girl did rent out her gash To gentlemen paying in cash"
Saul Bollox
Posts: 1271

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Saul Bollox »

"It's not easy being from Liverpool, As my accent can sound phlegmy and cruel Curly hair and moustache, And those shell suits so gash Being a scouse is really uncool. A Tottenham supporter called Solly. Pushed a stolen supermarket trolley."
HairyHammer
Posts: 217

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post HairyHammer »

"If I were Invisible Id zoom To the girls netball changing room But I'm ugly and fat And far too old for that In reality had I dared, Id be doomed. It's not easy being from Liverpool, As my accent can sound phlegmy and cruel"
Saul Bollox
Posts: 1271

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Saul Bollox »

"That Angelique Kerber is so cute, And Just like the sweetest of fruit. I'd put her on all fours, And rip of her drawers. And give her a bloody good root. If I were invisible I'd zoom To the girls netball changing room"
HairyHammer
Posts: 217

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post HairyHammer »

"A rickshaw wallah from bombay, Picked up a prostitute one day. She had almond shaped eyes, And her butt was a prize, But to his shock, she was a man who was gay. That Angelique Kerber is so cute, And Just like the sweetest of fruits."
Saul Bollox
Posts: 1271

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Saul Bollox »

"The lunch I just had was delightful And the documentary on TV was Insightful, Then I watched that Eastenders, It's for women and benders Which I have to conclude was just frightful. A rickshaw wallah from Bombay, Picked up a prostitute one day."
Saul Bollox
Posts: 1271

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Saul Bollox »

"The lunch I just had was delightful And the documentary on TV was Insightful, Then I watched that Eastenders, It's for women and benders Which I have to conclude was just frightful. A rickshaw wallah from Bombay, Picked up a prostitute one day."
HairyHammer
Posts: 217

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post HairyHammer »

To see the game Live on TV. Sorry.
HairyHammer
Posts: 217

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post HairyHammer »

"To see the game on TV, Iv'e had to sign up to BT, It was a bit of a chore Hoping we at least get a draw Or ill turn that BT box to debris. The lunch I just had was delightful And the documentary on TV was Insightful,"
Saul Bollox
Posts: 1271

Re: New Limerick Thread

Post Saul Bollox »

Homo Obscenus Ha ha ha ha ha! Brilliant
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