New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[les marteaux]

"The story of Richard the third To most seems a little absurd Especially the bits About birds with big tits, From which he would lick lemon curd. There once was a bloke they called Chuck, Took a long time to get up the pluck."

[Helmut Shown]

"During filming the actor Brad Pitt, Had to go off the set for a bit. Some colonic irrigation Gave him his motivation But unfortunately unable to sit The story of Richard the third To most seems a little absurd"

[les marteaux]

"Whilst quaffing her favourite tipple In her blouse there was a small ripple, A small mouse was up Inside her D cup And she couldn't jump, she was a cripple. During filming the actor Brad Pitt, Had to go off the set for a bit."

[Helmut Shown]

"There was a young man called hunt, Took a girl for a ride in a punt. Whilst punting a!ong He whipped out his schlong The girl then took a seat in the front Whilst quaffing her favourite tipple In her blouse there was a small ripple"

[les marteaux]

"A West Indian girl from St Kitts Paraded in short outfits But one day a surprise, A sight for sore eyes, She wore one that actually fits. Couldn't think of anything else that rhymes either. There was a young man called hunt, Took a girl for a ride in a punt."

[Helmut Shown]

"The actress called Samantha Janus Had a bit part in Corialanus in the big orgy scene Over a bench she would lean Very rude, so let it not detain us (Couldn't think of anything else to rhyme) A West Indian girl from St Kitts Paraded in short outfits"

[les marteaux]

"A wolf in sheeps clothing up West Went stalking young girls in a vest, Each night in his cell, He goes though anal hell, It's what you get if you're a sex pest. The acrtress called Samantha Janus Had a bit part in Corialanus"

[les marteaux]

"A wolf in sheeps clothing up West Went stalking young girls in a vest, Each night in his cell, He goes though anal hell, It's what you get if you're a sex pest. The acrtress called Samantha Janus Had a bit part in Corialanus"

[easthambull]

"The arrogant Brady, and co., Are clearly not all ""In The Know"" Those revolting pricks with gob on their lips... I'd rather Lala and Po. A wolf in sheeps clothing up West Went stalking young girls in a vest"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"Our stewards are having a job In sorting out the West Ham yob ""Sit down or you're out!"" Is what some of them shout, ""And don't give me none of your gob!"" The arrogant Brady, and co., Are clearly not all ""In The Know"""

[les marteaux]

"There was a young lady called Renee Had a face like a female Troy Deeney, The kids sing a song That she's a right mong, And she don't look great in a bikini. Our stewards are having a job In sorting out the West Ham yob"

[Helmut Shown]

"A supporter of the Hornets, Was suffering from bad tourettes Our fans were finding His effing and blinding Was something one never forgets There was a young lady called Renee Had a face like a female Troy Deeney"

[Saul Bollox]

"A Chelsea fan called Miles His sex life ruined through piles, But up Clapham Junction He purchased some unction, So buggery now is all smiles. A supporter of the Hornets, Was suffering from bad tourettes."

[Helmut Shown]

"A working girl from Zanzibar. ""Entertained"" in the back of her car The service provided Was always derided But around there, best fuck by far A Chelsea fan called Miles His sex life ruined through piles"

[Saul Bollox]

"From what I can see, he is dead. A bullet went right through his head From an upper story Of the supository. A lone gunman fired, enough said. A working girl from Zanzibar. ""Entertained"" in the back of her car."

[Mike Oxsaw]

"Hoof ball, now the national game Propounded in Allardyce's name That fat old buffoon Is calling the tune But, sure, he'll be swerving the blame From what I can see, he is dead. A bullet went right through his head"

[Helmut Shown]

"A mohel from Bialystock Sucked blood from an infant's cock But he lingered too long On the little boy's schlong Next week he'll stand in the dock Hoof ball, now the national game Propounded in Allardyce's name"

[joe blob]

"To see their name on here Some posters want, it's clear, FROM the OS to flee And go back to UP And get BFS back for next year. A mohel from Bialystock Sucked blood from an infant's cock"

[joe blob]

"To see their name on here Some posters want, it's clear, For the OS to flee And go back to UP And get BFS back for next year. A mohel from Bialystock Sucked blood from an infant's cock"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"Down in Dixie the land of cotton. They say the girls drawers are rotten It's not the old Boll Weevil Creating scents so evil It's hygiene long forgotten To see their name on here Some posters want, it's clear"

[les marteaux]

Down in Dixie the land of cotton. They say the girls drawers are rotten

[les marteaux]

I want to go out on the lash But I really just ain't got the cash For a night in the pub Then go to a club And end up with a Doris for gash.

[les marteaux]

"Will the rent boys try to play Or play rough, as is their way. Will a cսnt referee, Give a spot kick for free, Or will it be a Hammers great day. Down in Dixie the land of cotton. They say the girls drawers are rotten"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"Will the rent boys try to play Or play rough, as is their way The pressures on THEM So our little French gem Can bag us three points on the day I want to go out on the lash But I really just ain't got the cash"

[Helmut Shown]

"In a new brothel near to Kirklees They've reduced rates for OAPs Their natures more placid But their cocks are too flaccid But they try their best for to please Will the rent boys try to play Or play rough, as is their way"