New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[joe blob]

"My wife has found out what I do It wasn't all that - just a screw, Just a bit of fun, With a young novice nun, She's threat'ning to leave, silly moo.. Mohammed (Peace be unto him), Was partial to underage quim."

[Mike Oxsaw]

There's been no acceptable bids Perhaps we'll get one from the yids That's well worth a punt To be rid of the cսnt He'll fit in with all of those flids My wife has found out what I do It wasn't all that - just a screw

[Helmut Shown]

"A Spurs fan steward at the OS Was starting to suffer from bad stress After acting the clown Telling people ""Sit Down"" He relaxes at home in a dress There's been no acceptable bids Perhaps we'll get one from the yids"

[Far East Hammer]

They're having at the Payet's for tea Escargots and cuisse de grenouiille And some lard By the yard Seems Dimitri's now a fatty A Spurs fan steward at the OS Was starting to suffer from bad stress

[joe blob]

"My life's in a bit of a rut It seems that I'm dating a slut, Told me she's an actress But I'm shocked I confess, Her films include all kind of smut. They're having at the Payet's for tea Escargots and cuisse de grenouiille"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"A man who had frogs legs for lunch Felt a kick in his mouth, then had a hunch That garlic & brie Was more ""Non"" than ""Oui"" Avoiding a well deserved punch. My life's in a bit of a rut It seems that I'm dating a slut"

[HairyHammer]

"There once was a woman called Marge From her minge came a stinking discharge No one could deny it Twas as rotten as Payet And smelt just like an old fishing Barge. A man who had frogs legs for lunch Felt a kick in his mouth, then had a hunch"

[joe blob]

"The crowd has backed Slav to the hilt Now let's get our team rebuilt Abandon our fears, And in one or two years For the PL title we can tilt. There once was a woman called Marge, From her minge came a stinking discharge"

[Helmut Shown]

"So, Payet he pines for Marseilles So much, he refuses to play The moody French schmuck Just don't give a fuck Fuck him right off I say The crowd has backed Slav to the hilt Now let's get our team rebuilt"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"There's a terrible smell of poo Someone farted and then followed through And then the daft prick Was violently sick Now we've run out of straws. What to do? So, Payet he pines for Marseilles So much, he refuses to play"

[Helmut Shown]

On this site's NFL thread Are the posters soft in the head The pundits disclaim It's a silly bugger's game On the telly when you should be in bed There's a terrible smell of poo Someone farted and then followed through

[joe blob]

"The council won't empty my bin. They say it's 'cos what it's got in An old duffle coat, The bones of a goat And thirty empty bottles of gin. On this site's NFL thread Are the posters soft in the head"

[Mike Oxsaw]

It's the fee paying fan he affronts A bigger pay packet he hunts. Well...he won't get it here So the stroppy old dear Will have to fuck off for more bunce. The council won't empty my bin. They say it's 'cos what it's got in

[Helmut Shown]

"The man from La Reunion, He was a big star now he's gone It's a load of old cack That he's injured his back To guarantee the pay that he's on It's the fee paying fan he affronts A bigger pay packet he hunts"

[joe blob]

"The TEAM now is on the same sheet, And playing some football so neat, Ignore all the flack Payet can go back, To his cuisse de grenouille and horse meat. The man from La Reunion, He was a big star now he's gone"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"There was a young lass from Hong Kong In her life she did everything wrong. She married a frog Who acted the hog So much so, he got his own song. The TEAM now is on the same sheet, And playing some football so neat"

[Saul Bollox]

Its the transfer window season It gives the tapper ups a reason In the past it would seem You were loyal to your team These cunts should be strung up for treason . There was a young lass from Hong Kong In her life she did everything wrong.

[Saul Bollox]

Its the transfer window season It gives the tapper ups a reason In the past it would seem You were loyal to your team These cunts should be strung up for treason . There was a young lass from Hong Kong In her life she did everything wrong.

[Helmut Shown]

"If Antonio to Chelsea we'd go, We'd sink to a new all time low Payet wants more pay So he's ready to betray Its loyalty we want them to show Its the transfer window season It gives the tapper ups a reason"

[Helmut Shown]

"If Antonio to Chelsea we'd go, We'd sink to a new all time low Payet wants more pay So he's ready to betray Its loyalty we want them to show Its the transfer window season It gives the tapper ups a reason"

[Saul Bollox]

"Baba Venga could not tell a lie A fool with red hair would rule high But she's been seen, In High Street Wood Green Saying the End of the World is Nigh. If Antonio to Chelsea we'd go, We'd sink to a new all time low."

[HairyHammer]

Catholic priest Father Dunne Was being sucked off by a nun She knew it was wrong But his dick thick and long Was a sin she just couldn't shun. Baba Venga could not tell a lie A fool with red hair would rule high

[Saul Bollox]

"At another school in the West Riding They still give the kids a good hiding, If they can't do their sums They must expose bare bums, And get extra strokes for back sliding Catholic priest Father Dunne Was being sucked off by a nun"

[Helmut Shown]

"There was a headmaster in Wembley, Who took out his cock in assembly. The kids were in awe As it hung to the floor But the matron went faint and all trembley At another school in the West Riding They still give the kids a good hiding"

[Saul Bollox]

"Health secretary Jeremy Hunt Always wants to confront, It drives me insane As I'm racking my brain, But the only rhyme for him is cսnt. There was a headmaster in Wembley, Who took out his cock in assembly."