New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[Mike Oxsaw]

"There was a young lady called Alice Who slipped her boyfriend Cialis But, she'd bought cheap, on-line So all was not fine And now he supports Crystal Palace Whilst playing a game of ""kiss-chase"", The young dyke just whipped out her mace"

[Saul Bollox]

*but

[Saul Bollox]

*but

[Saul Bollox]

"There was a nice fellow named Tim Who snorted a can full of Vim, Then this gormless bloke Cleaned his sink with his coke, That's why he's called Tim Nice bur Dim. There was a young lady called Alice Who slipped her boyfriend Cialis"

[The Stoat]

There was a young man from Beirut Came home as pissed as a newt He asked his nice chick To grab hold of his prick While inserting his anus with fruit There was a nice fellow named Tim Who snorted a can full of Vim

[Helmut Shown]

There was a young man from dover Who felt always obliged to bend over Feigning tying his lace A fart in your face And didn't smell much of clover There was a young man from Beirut Came home as pissed as a newt

[grasshopper]

A young thought he was cool By walking round flashing his tool The ladies felt sorry for him Because it was smaller than a micro-sim But atleast it is was bigger than tim's There was a young man from dover Who felt always obliged to bend over

[Helmut Shown]

"A young man who came from Southall Worked as a human cannon ball But the bang was much louder This time, too much powder He landed next day in Nepal A young thought he was cool By walking round flashing his tool"

[les marteaux]

"A well known London designer Went out wearing purple eye liner, A TV producer Who tried to seduce ""her"" Found a cock and not a vagina. A young man who came from Southall Worked as a human cannon ball."

[Helmut Shown]

"I once met a girl in Verona, Who turned out a right little moaner When she took the seed Of a randy old Swede She whined at the sight of his boner A well known London designer Went out wearing purple eye liner"

[les marteaux]

"A maiden, not long turned sixteen, Decided to play ""flick-a-bean"" While fing'ring her chasm, Had her first orgasm, Using a damp tea-cloth to clean I once met a girl in Verona, Who turned out a right little moaner"

[les marteaux]

"A maiden, not long turned sixteen, Decided to play ""flick-a-bean"" While fing'ring her chasm, Had her first orgasm, Using a damp tea-cloth to clean I once met a girl in Verona, Who turned out a right little moaner"

[les marteaux]

"A maiden, not long turned sixteen, Decided to play ""flick-a-bean"" While fing'ring her chasm, Had her first orgasm, Using a damp tea-cloth to clean I once met a girl in Verona, Who turned out a right little moaner"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"There was a young man called McCain Did a fart in an underground train But everyone knew; A straight follow-through As proved by the massive brown stain. A maiden, not long turned sixteen, Decided to play ""flick-a-bean"""

[Saul Bollox]

"It was said Una Stubbs bared her arse On a coffee table made out of glass Looking up was Brad Pitt, As she started to shit. He usually paid a young brass. There was a young man called McCain Did a fart in an underground train"

[Saul Bollox]

"It was said Una Stubbs bared her arse On a coffee table made out of glass Looking up was Brad Pitt, As she started to shit. He usually paid a young brass. There was a young man called McCain Did a fart in an underground train"

[Saul Bollox]

"4,000"

[Helmut Shown]

"I really couldn't help but stare At the stripper's mass of pubic hair Poking out of the ""wood"" Was her clit with its hood And fish permeating the air It was said Una Stubbs bared her arse On a coffee table made out of glass"

[Far East Hammer]

Venetian maestro Veronese Adorned a girl's minge with daisy He denied it in court The teen in question thought Her memory was strangely hazy I really couldn't help but stare At the stripper's mass of pubic hair

[HairyHammer]

Venetian maestro Veronese Adorned a girl's minge with daisy

[HairyHammer]

A model who posed for El Greco When you spoke near her crotch it would echo A small dick was a miss So some lovers would fist Though two fists would make her Falsetto A boy smoking weed for a laugh Suddenly spotted a pink Giraffe

[Saul Bollox]

"A model who posed for El Greco When you spoke near her crotch it would echo, Old Domenikos, Could not give a toss Except when it scared his pet gecko. Venetian maestro Veronese Adorned a girl's minge with daisy"

[Helmut Shown]

"When she took her skimpy thong down, The string bit had turned a dark brown The thing it was parting Had been constantly farting And had soiled the inside of her gown A model who posed for El Greco When you spoke near her crotch it would echo"

[les marteaux]

"He's avoided relegation once more And Cupped his ears to the haters galore, He fails to excite, And some say it;s shite, But the only thing counting's the score. When she took her skimpy thong down, The string bit had turned a dark brown"

[HairyHammer]

Naked in the street and confused All the passers by he abused He was squirting hot cream Then awoke from the dream With his penis erect and quite bruised. He's avoided relegation once more And Cupped his ears to the haters galore