New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[Far East Hammer]

"When I heard Alec Dane hit the gong, I knew that something had gone wrong. Gameshows had started Purists then smarted So Take Your Pick! you fucking dong I just went through a fucking typhoon Having said which I'm really no loon"

[joe blob]

"A gardener, while tending his plot, Considered that he knew a lot, He showed off, you see, Cos he'd been on TV, A contestant on the Golden Shot. When I heard Alec Dane hit the gong, I knew that something had gone wrong."

[Mike Oxsaw]

"It's said that the poet John Keats Liked sniffing girls bicycle seats. But the ones he liked best, More than all of the rest, Were those that had thin rubber pleats. A gardener, while tending his plot, Considered that he knew a lot"

[joe blob]

"There was a young lass called Lottie Who used a sex toy in her botty Which pushed and vibrated, Lit up and gyrated. It was given her by Tony Cottee. It's said that the poet John Keats Liked sniffing girls bicycle seats."

[Helmut Shown]

"A paedo gang member called Ali, Lured a young girl to an alley When he whipped off her knickers Watched by two vicars And a priest called Father O'Malley There was a young lass called Lottie Who used a sex toy in her botty"

[Helmut Shown]

"A paedo gang member called Ali, Lured a young girl to an alley When he whipped off her knickers Watched by two vicars And a priest called Father O'Malley There was a young lass called Lottie Who used a sex toy in her botty"

[Helmut Shown]

"A paedo gang member called Ali, Lured a young girl to an alley When he whipped off her knickers Watched by two vicars And a priest called Father O'Malley There was a young last called Lottie Who used a sex toy in her botty"

[joe blob]

"A sheep running scared from her shepherd Who's got a reputation I've heard Away she did pelt When he loosened his belt But 'twas just for a Richard the Third. A paedo gang member called Ali, Lured a young girl to an alley"

[Far East Hammer]

The athletes are feeling the strain Of running in the pissing rain But they don't have shopping Bags drenched through and sopping So I can't pity them in the main A sheep running scared from her shepherd Who's got a reputation I've heard

[Helmut Shown]

"This thread has run many a month Of rhymes this is the hundred and one-th Concise and crisp Replied the man with a lisp ""What are you some kind of cunth"" The athletes are feeling the strain Of running in the pissing rain"

[Son of Sam]

Tiddington Irons tips are hot They win more often than not But his memory is iffy it takes just a jiffy To put the two lines for the next one he forgot This thread has run many a month Of rhymes this is the hundred and one-th Good luck with this one

[tiddingtoniron]

"There was a young girl called Maria, Spread a new strain of gonorrhea Up the bum was she laid That`s where it was made And blended with her diahorrea"

[joe blob]

"A transvestite went out for a mince Hoping to find a handsome prince, Not quite in the plan He picked up a dustman, His walk has been odd ever since. There was a young girl called Maria, Spread a new strain of gonorrhea"

[Helmut Shown]

A curry propelled rapid motion Is winding it's way to the ocean My bowels are haywire And my ring is on fire Pass me the calamine lotion A transvestite went out for a mince Hoping to find a handsome prince

[Helmut Shown]

A curry propelled rapid motion Is winding it's way to the ocean My bowels are haywire And my ring is on fire Pass me the calamine lotion A transvestite went out for a mince Hoping to find a handsome prince

[Helmut Shown]

A curry propelled rapid motion Is winding it's way to the ocean My bowels are haywire And my ring is on fire Pass me the calamine lotion A transvestite went out for a mince Hoping to find a handsome prince

[Mike Oxsaw]

"There was a young man from Iran, Was arse-fucked by a dirty old man.. The randy shiite Was a sunni's delight Who takes cock whenever he can A curry propelled rapid motion Is winding it's way to the ocean"

[joe blob]

"I really thought it'd be silent But i farted a noisy torrent A problem, I think, These first two lines stink, This use of bad rhymes is abhorrent. There was a young man from Iran, Was arse-fucked by a dirty old man.."

[joe blob]

"I really thought it'd be silent But i farted a noisy torrent A problem, I think, These first two lines stink, This use of bad rhymes is abhorrent. There was a young man from Iran, Was arse-fucked by a dirty old man.."

[Far East Hammer]

"A lady, whilst doing her chores, Was scrubbing the step, on all fours. The postman said phwoar! Please show me some more Got thumped so hard he no longer jaws I really thought it'd be silent But i farted a noisy torrent"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"A Scotsman wearing a kilt Ran down the road at full tilt He'll not reach the end For, at the next bend He'll give up, then wither and wilt. A lady, whilst doing her chores, Was scrubbing the step, on all fours."

[Helmut Shown]

A nude sunbather got burnt down there Having shaved off all his pubic hair With no bushy hedge Burnt his meat and two veg He's now under hospital care A Scotsman wearing a kilt Ran down the road at full tilt

[Far East Hammer]

"There was a young man from Bude, Penned a Limerick rather rude Though really quite polite As compared to this site Where let's face it, we're all quite lewd A nude sunbather got burnt down there Having shaved off all his pubic hair"

[joe blob]

"I found this thread down on page three There's plenty of tits there to see. All manner of shite, From cunts left or right, Far too much drivel for me. There was a young man from Bude, Penned a Limerick rather rude"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"In the harem, the new eunoch viewed, Lovely young Arab girls in the nude But due to his lack His knob remained slack Which stopped him from acting quite rude I found this thread down on page three There's plenty of tits there to see."