New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[Helmut Shown]

Bonce !

[Helmut Shown]

"Troy Deeney is Watford's ex jailbird. When he plays us, behaves like a turd. His eyes, far apart, Nearly got the ""Sloth"" part In the Goonies, well that's what I've heard Dele Alli got hit on the bounce Some say ""good job"" the big ponce"

[arsene york-hunt]

"Kevin 'Bloody' Wilson I'll play To celebrate Crimbo my way, To be honest and blunt, Never heard of the cսnt, An icon perhaps, for the gay? Troy Deeney is Watford's ex jailbird. When he plays us, behaves like a turd."

[Mike the Hammer]

"A rambler, out walking the dale Trod down on an old rusty nail It was 3 feet in size Went in up to his thighs And left him completely impaled Kevin 'Bloody' Wilson I'll play To celebrate Crimbo my way"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"There was an old man called Barrett Who purchased a talking parrot There wasn't much talk. But plenty of squawk So he cooked it with peas and a carrot. A rambler, out walking the dale Trod down on an old rusty nail"

[Helmut Shown]

There once was a cowboy called Pat. Who sported a big Prairie Hat But those in the know Where he lived in Glasgow Thought he looked a prize twat There was an old man called Barrett Who purchased a talking parrot

[arsene york-hunt]

"A rider who fell from his horse Was heard using language quite coarse, This useless piece of shit, I'd big money on it Next time I'll invest on the Borse. There once was a cowboy called Pat. Who sported a big Prairie Hat"

[Helmut Shown]

"A young Boy Scout for his Bob-a-Job, Had to play with a pensioners knob Then the poor young kid Was given a quid To put his old bill in his gob A rider who fell from his horse Was heard using language quite coarse"

[arsene york-hunt]

"So. Snodders & Skip do a flyer, To see our sick girl, little Isla. I'll be quite direct, It's what one would expect, Next up? they're seeing Kieran Dyer .A young Boy Scout for his Bob-a-Job, Had to play with a pensioners knob"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"An armless tart from Columbo Can make you come using her toe. And wrapping her gob Round the end of your knob Can certainly make the juice flow. So. Snodders & Skip do a flyer, To see our sick girl, little Isla."

[arsene york-hunt]

"So. People turn out to be gay. Genetics or conditioned that way? It's said there are some With lusts for for just bum, And those who like fannies, who stray. An armless tart from Columbo Can make you come using her toe."

[Mike Oxsaw]

The most popular girl in school Was changing to get in the pool. But when she got wet Your house you could bet That the pervy old teachers would drool. So. People turn out to be gay. Genetics or conditioned that way?

[Helmut Shown]

Rolf Harris gave blokes half a crown To tie his Kangaroo down And a string of pearls For nubile girls Before he was ran out of town The most popular girl in school Was changing to get in the pool

[arsene york-hunt]

Rolf Harris gave blokes half a crown To tie his Kangaroo down

[arsene york-hunt]

"Andy Carroll speaks of his chagrin At the comments his injuries bring, These jokes may appal But for doing fuck all He's kept in fancy watches and bling. Rolf Harris gave bloke half a crown To tie his Kangaroo down"

[Mike the Hammer]

Jamie Oliver causes affront As a fat tongued mockney cսnt But his recipe's work So he may be a berk But he's more use than Jeremy Hunt Andy Carroll speaks of his chagrin At the comments his injuries bring

[Helmut Shown]

"Michael Jackson just loved little boys, Who got more to play with than just toys. With money, it seems You fulfil all your dreams And the lawyers that money employs Jamie Oliver causes affront As a fat tongued mockney cսnt"

[arsene york-hunt]

"He made a fortune in women's drawers Enough to open three London stores, And, as you may guess, They're a roaring success. As he staffs them with half naked whores Michael Jackson just loved little boys, Who got more to play with than just toys."

[Helmut Shown]

"Limericks on westhamonline, Football or filth are just fine But on here some pricks Talk politics And most, to the far right align He made a fortune in women's drawers Enough to open three London stores"

[arsene york-hunt]

"Fulham, now a charity case Will we lose when we play at their place? Rising to the big game. Then it's always the same, Losing to shit is our usual shame. Limericks on westhamonline, Football or filth are just fine"

[Helmut Shown]

"There once was a pervert called Ray For girls dirty drawers he would pay On EBay his bids For knickers with skids With a very pungent bouquet Fulham, now a charity case Will we lose when we play at their place?"

[Helmut Shown]

"There once was a pervert called Ray For girls dirty drawers he would pay On EBay his bids For knickers with skids With a very pungent bouquet Fulham, now a charity case Will we lose when we play at their place?"

[Helmut Shown]

"* Sorry in the last Limerick I did the last word should have read ""chuff"" .......fucking predictive text There once was a pervert called Ray For girls dirty drawers he would pay On EBay his bids For knickers with skids With a very pungent bouquet Fulham, now a charity case Will we listened we play at their place?"

[arsene york-hunt]

It would seem like Theresa May Lives to fight another day In a premiership race Would'd we get in her place Perhaps a PM who is gay. There once was a pervert called Ray For girls dirty drawers he would pay

[Helmut Shown]

"He keyed in big tits and hairy muff, On the internet he loved this stuff. But instead of fanny Was a picture of a granny With a courgette stuck up her shift It would seem like Theresa May Lives to fight another day"