New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[cup of tea]

There was a young man from Odessa. Decided to be a cross dresser Sparkly tops he would wear And a bow in his hair Now goes by the name of big Tessa Big Dave six foot tall from Leeds Went out with a girl special needs

[arsene york-hunt]

"Putin seems to be in a strop As the bombs on Ukraine start to drop. Others have to fight For this despotic shite, About time he was given the chop. There was a young man from Odessa. Decided to be a cross dresser"

[cup of tea]

What chance that we keep Declan Rice when Sulli says 100 mill would be nice The lying little cսnt Sure has some front Even ¬£50m would probably entice Putin seems to be in a strop As the bombs on Ukraine start to drop

[Dowies Love Child]

Conte wants out of the lane Must want to fuck off to Spain I can't say I'm surprised that Levy's so despised along with that twat Harry Kane. What chance that we keep Declan Rice when Sulli says 100 mill would be nice

[cup of tea]

"A shop worker called Mrs. Jenner, From the till, she half inched a tenner. to pay for her rent In her 3 bed in Kent That she shared with theate ayrton senna Conte wants out of the lane Must want to fuck off to Spain"

[arsene york-hunt]

"Cowdenbeath are the team that I follow If they go down it's nothing but sorrow, This Scottish fitba' The standard is poor, And the ticket price I have to borrow. A shop worker called Mrs. Jenner, From the till, she half inched a tenner."

[cup of tea]

Now Putin who's a boorish kind of bloke Invaded Ukraine as a bit of a joke With missiles and planes He'll hope to make gains At least he is not fucking woke Cowdenbeath are the team that I follow If they go down there will be nothing but sorrow

[cup of tea]

Now Putin who's a boorish kind of bloke Invaded Ukraine as a bit of a joke With missiles and planes He'll hope to make gains At least he is not fucking woke Cowdenbeath are the team that I follow If they go down there will be nothing but sorrow

[Alwaysaniron]

"This site really needs a witch hunt Inspire, it is hoped, by a cսnt. So if your fancy is tickled Then we'll all pick on Pickled A cսnt with quite enough front. Now Putin who's a boorish kind of bloke Invaded Ukraine as a bit of a joke"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"To a brothel in old Timbuctoo Went a trav'ller a really old jew, His choice for a shag, Was a wrinkled fat hag, Well versed in the things she must do. This site really needs a witch hunt, Inspired, it is hoped, by a cսnt."

[arsene york-hunt]

"Before restrictions were repealed It didnt count for the well heeled So toffs hale and hearty Enjoyed a good party Saying bollocks to the Covid shield. To a brothel in old Timbuctoo Went a trav'ller a really old jew,"

[Helmut Shown]

Will Putin invade the Ukraine The man is not suitably sane This tinpot dictator This human rights violater Has nothing but shit for a brain Before restrictions were repealed It didnt count for the well heeled

[cup of tea]

A lot of the match they will miss As they keep getting up for a piss Ten lagers will do it Plus curry you'll poo it On a train all the way back to Diss Will Putin invade the Ukraine The man is not suitably sane

[Helmut Shown]

Our performance drops quite a bit When playing those teams who are shit. Our hopes have all faded Our players are jaded And some not fit for the kit A lot of the match they will miss As they keep getting up for a piss

[arsene york-hunt]

"Or slide down the table has started, Again we are left broken hearted. Yet another false dawn, Better off watching porn, 'Til the Dildo Boys have departed. Our performance drops quite a bit When playing those teams who are shit."

[arsene york-hunt]

"Or slide down the table has started, Again we are left broken hearted. Yet another false dawn, Better off watching porn, 'Til the Dildo Boys have departed. Our performance drops quite a bit When playing those teams who are shit."

[Mike Oxsaw]

"Moysie you're having a laugh When the ball is stuck in our half In the air, on the ground, We just pass it around And don't really have the right staff. Or slide down the table has started, Again we are left broken hearted."

[Helmut Shown]

"On SKY we must turn off the sound, As ex-victims players abound, Complaints go unheeded Subtitles are needed Sounds like a cat being drowned Moysie you're having a laugh When the ball is stuck in our half"

[arsene york-hunt]

"Our squad punches above its weight Realistically just top eight, It could not be clearer If we get much nearer Bent refs will determine our fate. On SKY we must turn off the sound, As ex-victims players abound,"

[,]

What West Ham will turn up this week A shitshower with little technique Or Our very effective Hard working collective That Moyes has to sometimes tweak. Our squad punches above its weight Realistically just top eight

[Helmut Shown]

This storm talk needs to be binned Alas I can't hear any wind Oh half a mo Its beginning to blow Red warning they may not rescind What West Ham will turn up this week? A shitshower with little technique?

[cup of tea]

Some said before Trump was in power Whores gave him a golden shower their pussies they frigged All over his wig The juice produced a large flower This storm talk needs to be binned Alas I can't hear any wind

[Helmut Shown]

I once had piles that were so bad Still hurt even when sat on a pad With my finger I'd ream With some Anusol cream The pain is just driving me mad Some said before Trump was in power Whores gave him a golden shower

[cup of tea]

"My girlfriend don't love me no more, I think she now works as a whore From Penzance to Wick She'll suck any dick Whilst screaming and crying for more I once had piles that were so bad Still hurt even when sat on a pad"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"Whilst wandering through town of Welling My balls started sweating and swelling It could have been worse Has I strolled around Hurst But that's for another day's telling. My girlfriend don't love me no more, I think she now works as a whore"