New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[arsene york-hunt]

"The standard of driving around here Gets worse by the day, i fear, Since the fourbys did spill, Over from Stamford Hill Canvey Island? you want to steer clear. For actors to get any jobs, It seems they must expose their knobs"

[Helmut Shown]

"Boris standing at the dispatch... Box,glimpsed Angela Raynor's snatch Despite protestations And woke allegations On her gusset was formed a moist patch The standard of driving around here Gets worse by the day, i fear"

[arsene york-hunt]

"I hate when I can't get my way 's my RIGHT I often would say, My tantrums you see, Always works for me. I know this all sounds a bit gay. Boris standing at the dispatch... Box,glimpsed Angela Raynor's snatch"

[arsene york-hunt]

"I hate when I can't get my way 's my RIGHT I often would say, My tantrums you see, Always works for me. I know this all sounds a bit gay. Boris standing at the dispatch... Box,glimpsed Angela Raynor's snatch"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"There was a young lady called Grace Would squat on her boyfriend's face. Then piss golden showers, For hours and hours, Her pee went all over the place. I hate when I can't get my way 's my RIGHT I often would say"

[Helmut Shown]

Some look down on the food bank queuing But it’s really uncomfortable viewing The government are aware But they don't fucking care The cunts don't know what they're doing There was a young lady called Grace Would squat on her boyfriend's face

[arsene york-hunt]

"Some look down on the food bank queuing But it’s really uncomfortable viewing These lazy, feckless fools, Should have worked hard in schools. Got a job with good money accruing. Boris standing at the dispatch... Box,glimpsed Angela Raynor's snatch"

[,]

I’ve just booked a ticket to Mars I’ve heard they’ve got strippers in bars Before anyone answers There are also Pole dancers Who take off their underwired bras Some look down on the food bank queuing But it’s really uncomfortable viewing

[Mike Oxsaw]

"He worked in the local food bank, And met an old codger called Frank They shared some stale bread, Then one of them said, ""The last fart I did really stank"". I've just booked a ticked to Mars. I've heard they've got strippers in bars."

[arsene york-hunt]

"As he walked along the seafront A predator out on the hunt. A mouse he did follow And ate one swallow Did not know what hit the poor cսnt. He worked in the local food bank, And met an old codger called Frank"

[Helmut Shown]

"A gay man, I think he is Welsh Had just been given, his first felch With his arse showing spillage The only gay in the village? As he sat with a resounding squelch As he walked along the seafront A predator out on the hunt"

[arsene york-hunt]

"There seems to be happening a race, About what can be changed at high pace This rhyme makes me feel thick, Far too esoteric, But I'll finish it, just in case. A gay man, I think he is Welsh Had just been given, his first felch"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"The window has been open a while But there's nothing that's making us smile But the board have saved wads, The sloth-like old sods And bought yet more bling for their pile. There seems to be happening a race, About what can be changed at high pace"

[Helmut Shown]

"A bloke who I know says his brother, Has rough anal sex with their mother In Norfolk its de rigueur Whether royalty or gravedigger If you fancy a bit of the other The window has been open a while But there's nothing that's making us smile"

[arsene york-hunt]

"He thought she was class in his heart But she lifted her leg, dropped a fart, He started to object 'Tis not what you'd expect From a lady who teaches fine art. A bloke who I know says his brother, Has rough anal sex with their mother"

[Helmut Shown]

"The money Dave saves on staff wages, Is the reason our transfers take ages While the yids get the cream We can but dream While brinkmanship Sully engages He thought she was class in his heart But she lifted her leg, dropped a fart"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"There was a young man Wood Green, Who bought a new bugg'ry machine. He set it to ""fast"", But his arse didn't last, Now he can't keep his underpants clean. The money Dave saves on staff wages, Is the reason our transfers take ages"

[arsene york-hunt]

"In Wakefield in the West Riding I hope Boris gets a good hiding. The choice is the pits The useless Labour shits, In the wings their time are biding. There was a young man Wood Green, Who bought a new bugg'ry machine."

[arsene york-hunt]

"In Wakefield in the West Riding I hope Boris gets a good hiding. The choice is the pits The useless Labour shits, In the wings their time are biding. There was a young man Wood Green, Who bought a new bugg'ry machine."

[Helmut Shown]

I don't get no help with my bills. Illegals. That's causing my ills On so many fronts The Tories are cunts Somebody pass me my pills In Wakefield in the West Riding I hope Boris gets a good hiding

[Mike Oxsaw]

"A lady from Parliament Hill Whilst shagging was violently ill. She puked with such force, It hit a golf course, A few miles just north-west of Rhyl. I don't get no help with my bills. Illegals. That's causing my ills"

[Helmut Shown]

"There was an old geezer called MIck, Had habits that make you feel sick After wild anal sex Covered in shit flecks He made her suck on his prick A lady from Parliament Hill Whilst shagging was violently ill"

[arsene york-hunt]

"There once was a man from Crewe Who found himself banned from the zoo, This perverted fool, Was flashing his tool, To young girls watching a kangaroo. There was an old geezer called MIck, Had habits that make you feel sick."

[mashed in maryland]

There was a young lady called Babs Had a serious case of the crabs She took to her cսnt A razor ever so blunt And her snatch looked like 2 smashed kebabs There once was a man from Crewe Who found himself banned from the zoo

[mashed in maryland]

There was a young lady called Babs Had a serious case of the crabs She took to her cսnt A razor ever so blunt And her snatch looked like 2 smashed kebabs There once was a man from Crewe Who found himself banned from the zoo