New Limerick Thread

[les marteaux]

Same as before The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront

[arsene york-hunt]

"As a referee that Peter Bankes Is treating supporters like planks, Another of them Unfit for the Prem, Should be in the National League. Your typical Newcastle louse, Now has indoor bogs in their house"

[Helmut Shown]

"I went on a blind double-date, A foursome: two birds and a mate. My hand up her skirt Caused a serious red alert As I felt ""her"" penis inflate As a referee that Peter Bankes Is treating supporters like planks"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"The bog was in use, I said ""fuck it"". And went for a shit in the bucket But the pot was in use, So I had to let loose In the pisser - it smelt quite a bit. I went on a blind double-date, A foursome: two birds and a mate."

[arsene york-hunt]

"“Fur coat and no knickers” they say In Essex it’s the natural way Tatoos and piercING Full body waxING. I could swear most of these blokes are gay. The bog was in use, I said ""fuck it"". And went for a shit in the bucket"

[Helmut Shown]

A round of applause for our Mike That last Lim'rick I really like But I’d like to know How he knows what they show He’s been looking! The dirty tyke “Fur coat and no knickers” they say In Essex it’s the natural way

[arsene york-hunt]

"A real man we all know as Frank, Was apt to dodge soap - and he stank. His workmates object, Not what you'd expect, From a soldier driving a tank. A round of applause for our Mike That last Lim'rick I really like"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"He saw on the net something rude, A jap school with girls in the nude. It left him unsated, All clunge pixilated With nothing but blurs to be viewed. A real man we all know as Frank, Was apt to dodge soap - and he stank."

[arsene york-hunt]

"At school the boy said ""Miss"" ""I want to go for a piss"" Then in just a bit, Said ""I need a shit"", His language is somewhat remiss. He saw on the net something rude, A jap school with girls in the nude.."

[Helmut Shown]

"There was a young man from Welling Who stole dirty drawers for smelling. gusset in his face stinking of plaice Guaranteed to get his knob swelling At school the boy said ""Miss"" ""I want to go for a piss"""

[arsene york-hunt]

"A serious pile of hot poo: The Tories, and their HS2 A conventional train, Does the trip without pain, In hours, a bit more than two. There was a young man from Welling Who stole dirty drawers for smelling."

[Mike Oxsaw]

"Klopp said a a typical kraut When losing just hear the cսnt shout! That worked well in the war, So...do it some more They're serial victims, no doubt. A serious pile of hot poo: The Tories, and their HS2"

[Helmut Shown]

Listening to the scouse cսnt squeals Now the fucker know how it feels Beneficiaries by far From the cunts at VAR As Salah trips on his own his heels Klopp said a a typical kraut When losing just hear the cսnt shout

[arsene york-hunt]

"There was an old man from Benfleet At a urinal pissed on his feet, Decided to sit Out came unformed shit Which went all over the seat. Listening to the scouse cսnt squeals Now the fucker know how it feels"

[arsene york-hunt]

There was an old man from Benfleet At a urinal pissed on his feet De

[Helmut Shown]

It's nice to beat them fucking blades. They've moaned about us for decades 'This time no one to blame But they'll whinge just the same As their premier league dream fades There was an old man from Benfleet At a urinal pissed on his feet

[arsene york-hunt]

"A man with a very long dick Doing oral, made the poor girl sick The thing made her gag She threw up in a bag, Then fucked off home to Hackney Wick. It's nice to beat them fucking blades. They've moaned about us for decades"

[Helmut Shown]

"An angel came down from above, And started to hand out the love. But at Westhamonline She had to decline As they all wank in a sock or a glove A man with a very long dick Doing oral, made the poor girl sick"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"A teenager was sent home from school In the classroom played with his tool. It got a bit much... All his mates had a touch While the girls all just sit there and drool. An angel came down from above, And started to hand out the love."

[Helmut Shown]

"There once was an Irish tinker Farted in the pub, a stinker The barman said “Crikey You dirty old pikey!” Not a place for the social drinker A teenager was sent home from school In the classroom played with his tool"

[arsene york-hunt]

"Another girl killed very dead, ""It's cultural enhancement"" they said It's all caused you know Two hundred years ago, By slavery and by bloodshed. There once was an Irish tinker Farted in the pub, a stinker"

[arsene york-hunt]

"Another girl killed very dead, ""It's cultural enhancement"" they said It's all caused you know Two hundred years ago, By slavery and by bloodshed. There once was an Irish tinker Farted in the pub, a stinker"

[Pee Wee]

"Another girl killed very dead, ""It's cultural enhancement"" they said Oxsaw the racist the dim boring racist as a kid he was dropped on his head Oxsaw the dim boring loon loves using the racist word coon"

[Mike Oxsaw]

"The magistrate hearing this tale, Gave the fat Scot six months in jail In Gaelic he's sing You can slip it right in Until I get out on the bail. Another girl killed very dead, ""It's cultural enhancement"" they said"

[arsene york-hunt]

"A scotsman who's rather well built Was arrested for raising his kilt, Exposing his tool By the local girls school, In court he admitted his guilt. The magistrate hearing this tale, Gave the fat Scot six months in jail"

[Helmut Shown]

"A slapper from near BirmingHAM, Used to work as a strippergram As her panties came off Her clients would scoff At the size of her big hairy clam A scotsman who's rather well built Was arrested for raising his kilt"